Am I being pathetic?

[strawberryshortcakex]

For the past three days my back left side ribs have been hurting. It feels like something being squeezed every time I breath and when I move my back I'm in agony. The first two days the pain has not been so bad however yesterday afternoon the pain has been agonising to the point I was up untill 3 am this morning crying in pain.

I have asked my partner if he would be able to take the day of today to help me with our son and so that I can go to the doctors. We don't have a car and my son refuses to sit in his pram and to walk so I have to carry him most places. My partner told me that I am being pathetic, that I am not on my death bed, he can't take the day of work for something so small as he his adamant that I have pulled a muscle. He has said that I am acting like a little bitch and I need to grow up. Ive asked him if he can at-least help me clean up before he goes to work usually he gets picked up around 10am. I need his help as I am finding it really hard to move and especially bending down. He told me that he's sick of me and this relationship how unhappy he is and how he's sick of going to work and then having to help me when he's home. I'm really fed up now and I really just needed his help as I am in pain I feel like he doesn't seem to believe me but I have no reason to even lie.

Have you taken any painkillers for your back/rib pain? Start with that, paracetamol and ibuprofen as directed on the packet. You may feel a bit stronger if you are not in so much pain.

The real issue here is your partner, you are in an abusive relationship. If packing his bags is what it takes to get rid of him then I'd do it.

What is your housing situation? Do you own or rent and whose name is on the paperwork? If you own or rent in your name only then pack his bags and change the locks. Have friends on standby to help you and be ready to call the police if he doesn't leave quietly. His threats to harm himself are pure manipulation, ignore.

Of you do want to follow through on ending the relationship then you could post on the relationships board where there are plenty of posters who can give you advice on practical matters and the support to get through it.

You cannot continue to live with such an awful man, you really do deserve better.

Then you will need to add door chains and a ring camera and tell him you if he pulls that stunt again you will report his friend to the police.

His best friend is a lock smith when I left and went to my mums house his friend unlocked my door for him to get into my house.

I'm pretty sure that's a criminal offence on the part of him and his friend.

OP, this man is abusive, which I assume you already know.

Why are you still having sex with him 2/3 times a week when he repeatedly tells you he doesn't love you and is going to find someone else?

Reading all your posts there is nothing good about this person or your relationship. It's like you are looking after 2 children!
Apologies for asking if dc was his; it was the fact all your posts say 'my son' not 'our son' - very telling 🙁

100% tell him to leave
Do you have any trusted friends that can help you pack his stuff?
Whose name is on the mortgage/rental agreement?

Please call Women's Aid to help you through the process
And go to an urgent care centre today

Please call women’s aid, the hv , the dr or police. This is abuse. Men like this never get better. Soon your son will start copying the way his dad behaves towards you and will grow to become like him. Don’t let it happen, you need to to protect your son from this. Abuse affects the children too. It’s your job to protect your son by protecting yourself and leave him.

Could well be gallstones, tell that c*nt where the door is! Id shock him with no plan and kick him out with immediate effect with no plan in place for him.

He's an absolute waste of space. I'd definitely be packing his bags because it's not like you'd be missing much!
Tell your GP everything.

You need a GP appt as a matter of urgency.
Just put the baby in the pram. He will survive.

Then you need to get away from this guy.

Either start by telling the GP you are being abused or make contact with Women’s Aid.

Ignore any threats to kill himself, they are just a way to keep you from leaving.

What a cock knocker!!!! Get rid of him and involve police if you have to. You don't want your son growing up seeing this is how we treat mummy. Good luck

OP, he won't kill himself. They all say that. Or set it up so you find them "just in time". It's a horrible manipulation tactic to panic you so you immediately jump to their "rescue".

I’m not judging on the child/pram situation. One of mine was a nightmare in the pram, absolutely horrendous to take anywhere for more than an hour from the moment he learned to move around himself.

Your partner is abusive and that’s the pain issue here. You need to get away or call the police if he breaks back in again. This is no way to live.

As for the pain, it could be pleurisy. It’s horrendously painful, feels like someone is cracking your ribs from inside you. If it is, it needs treatment otherwise you could end up in a much worse condition.

Kick him out. Let him message you that he’s going to kill himself. Then send those messages to his family saying you’re seriously concerned for his MH and that either you or they need to call an ambulance/the police straight away. If it’s all just another abusive act it will soon put a stop to it.

He is absolutely horrific. You need to leave him immediately.
Call women's aid. Find an exit route. You don't have to live like this.
And put your toddler in the pram to get to the doctor

Jesus woman what is this man bringing to your life?

Barely in work.
Has sex with you (when it sounds like you don't want it - that's rape by the way) 2-3 times a week but is clearly angling to cheat if he isn't already cheating.
Doesn't work with you when it comes to parenting your child.
Gets his friend to illegally access your home.

Go to the doctors. Your son goes in the pram whether he screams bloody murder or not. When you're feeling able, chuck all your 'partners' crap in a bin bag and leave it outside, under shelter if you're feeling nice. Get a friend or family member - preferably big and male - to come and help you change the locks and add chains.

You and your son deserve better than this. Tell him you're setting him free to go and find someone who will have sex with him as much as he wants.

This sounds a lot like pleurisy - I've had it twice, and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. Get yourself an appointment with the GP asap.

Do you have any family nearby who can help you?

How are you OP?