Daughters friend claiming dog bit her

[Changedname23]

Such a random one. DD's friend is here to stay for a few days. They are both 11. They were sent to bed at 10pm but came down at 10.30pm wanting to put on a show. I listened to them for 10 mins and was about to send them on their way when DDs friend said our dog had bitten her.

The dog was on the sofa and was licking his paws because he has an allergy (we think to grass and its been treated). There was no growl and I was sitting right beside them both. Sometimes if the dog doesn't want people in his space he will do a low growl or will mouth at you (when putting his harness on). When we nice he will give us a lick. He has never snapped or bitten anyone. He goes to doggy daycare two days a week and no behavioural issues.

Now DD has come down to say her friend keeps saying the dog has bitten her. I examined the area thoroughly and there is nothing, no red mark. Zilch.

I was right beside them and saw nothing. Not quite sure how to proceed in the morning if she keeps saying the dog has bitten her. She has a much bigger dog herself and he can do the mouthing thing too but also no biting.

Just looking for some perspective/advice

Keep them separate, and if she says it again ask her to point to where and take a couple photos close and and so you can see the location of the site. All phone photos have time stamps and edit data- I’d want proof that there isn’t a mark on her. I’d then phone her mum and tell her that she keeps saying this even though there isn’t a mark on her, no one heard or saw anything-even a yelp when this “happened” and you can’t have her in your house if she is going to keep saying this

my suspicion is that she is lying for attention-but this could be disastrous for your dog.

I'll see what she says when she gets up. I'm really upset about the whole thing. I'm glad he's at doggy daycare today and tomorrow as we are getting work done in the garden so can't even put him out there during the day. I'll bring him before she gets up so she won't see him today, or will hardly see him.

I've been thinking about this some more (sleepless night) and I'm thinking its more along the lines of he did have her hand /arm in his mouth, she did feel a tooth. However, it might not have been what we would call a normal bite. She could have put her hand down to stroke him at the exact time he opened his mouth to lick his paws. In other words, it's something and nothing.

Do what you have already planned. Ask how she is, whether any brusing came up, photo it. Mention it to her mother and that you think it was an accidental tooth against hand rather than deliberately but you are mindful enough to keep them separated.

I also agree with pp. Get your own daughter to stop doing whatever that makes your dog growl. He's told her loud and clear multiple times to stop so why hasn't she?

I agree I think there was some sort of contact but the way she bounced onto the couch I think accidental too.

My DD has ADHD and is very impulsive. I have told her time and time again to leave the dog alone when he is asleep and she mainly does but impulse takes over at times and she will go right in his face. He has never snapped just a little growl and she does more away. Its very frustrating.

Could it be that your dog was nibbling at his paws for a scratch (the allergy) and has just accidently caught her? I'm sure many of us have been nibbled by a puppy and we no it's a nibble but it doesn't leave a mark on us, maybe this is what your dog has done but the girl is referring to it as a bite as she probably sees a dog bite and nibble as the same thing 🤔 my dog nibbles herself to scratch and I've had kids in the house who have gone and stroked her right where she is nibbling and the dogs accidently caught their hand. It's never malicious and never left a mark or hurt anyone, usually a tickle and laugh if anything.

Also please be careful with your dog and daughter. I know it must be difficult due to the ADHD. My sons nan had a family dog for years, raised in a house with 4 boisterous boys and never harmed a fly. All my son did was sit next to it on the sofa one day and it jumped up and bit him On the face which required hospital treatment. Noone would have ever expected it from such a calm family dog but it happened.

Does she mean scratched rather than bite and mixed up words?
If not, it would be a brusque 'no he didn't bite you. I was there and you would certainly know about it if he had. There isn't a mark on you!'

What a lovely way to describe a child....

The jumping thing isn't ok and is giving "he's only being friendly" vibes.

Christ alive, the melodrama. Get a grip.

Update. Dog went to doggy daycare this morning before she got up. She didn't mention a thing and I sneakily looked at her wrist and nothing, not a mark. I will keep the dog away from her today but will keep an eye on her reaction when she sees him.

I wouldn’t be having this child to stay again, sounds like it’s not worth the aggro and stress.

Keep the focus on her avoiding the dog. At that age she should know how to respect sick animals. And stop telling lies.

If she’d been telling the truth, she’d be steering clear anyway.

My DD has ADHD and is very impulsive. I have told her time and time again to leave the dog alone when he is asleep and she mainly does but impulse takes over at times and she will go right in his face. He has never snapped just a little growl and she does more away. Its very frustrating.

I will admit freely I don't know enough about ADHD but could you try a different approach here? Talk about what bullying in school could be like, how it affects the one being bullied, how would she feel if others bullied her...if that goes well with her fully understanding the concept could you say that her upsetting the dog to the point he growls is her bullying the dog. It might sound a bit brutal for an 11yr old, and only you know how your DD would react to that information, but she is kinda bullying the dog. You could go even further and say if he bites her he will have to be put down. Sometimes kids need to hear the harsh realities otherwise it's "ugh, mum's having a strop again, the dog's finnnnneeee, he loves me!"

Anyway, on the problem you actually posted about (sorry!) I think you are doing the right things.

Poor Dog, I wouldn't have her round again.

Sounds like she’s attention seeking.

You handled it well , better than I would have.
She's old enough to understand what a potentially dangerous lie that was.
She wouldn't be welcome back tbh.

Agreed! The dog didn’t move or make a sound, there isn’t a mark on her skin.
she hasn’t got her “words muddled up” fgs, she’s 11, that’s secondary school age. She has clearly lied and if I were the OP I’d be worried re the implications of this.

Not a mention or sign of a bite today. I've kept the dog away as much as I possibly can and she's had no reaction to him either way, and vice versa. I'm going to give her the benefit of the doubt and assume she connected with his mouth when she jumped onto the couch. I'll keep him clear until she goes in a few days.

Ask her where the dog 'bit' her and take a photo of the place. If she complains to her mother, you have photographic evidence that it didn't happen.