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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not cut the hedge

32 replies

Ineedsleepandcoffee · 15/07/2023 16:01

I have a hedge at the front of my garden. I came home the other day to find my neighbour has cut the side bordering his garden but also about a metres length at the front, which is clearly our hedge and makes the rest of the hedge look far worse than it did before. I was intending to cut the hedge when I got a chance but I have a lot of other constraints on my time and quite often there is a car parked on the pavement blocking the hedge so it is past due to be cut. This week my 5yo has been in hospital having emergency surgery. She is home today and cuddled up with daddy so I could go and do it now but then it looks like I have been shamed into it, so that makes me feel like I want to just leave it as it is.
So what would you do
Yabu - just cut it
Yanbu- do it when you feel like it and it is convenient and not when you feel shamed into it.

OP posts:
TheInterceptor · 15/07/2023 16:02

Tell him about the week you've had, and ask if he'd be so kind as to do your side?

ForeverFriendsAndPierrot · 15/07/2023 16:03

Who cares what people think? Shamed?

If it's encroaching on the pavement area then just cut it

readsalotgirl63 · 15/07/2023 16:04

Neighbour is out of order to cut your hedge. He is entitled to cut it on "his" side only.
I would politely tell him that he is not to cut it

Original poster
Ineedsleepandcoffee · 15/07/2023 16:08

I should say it is not causing any problems to any pedestrians being overgrown as the cars parking there prevent anyone walking on the pavement there anyway. Not that there are pedestrians really.

OP posts:
DustyLee123 · 15/07/2023 16:09

I’d leave it just to be an arse.

10HailMarys · 15/07/2023 16:10

It’s your hedge! Do what you want with it. Your neighbour is of course entitled to cut his side, but your side is your own business. He shouldn’t have cut the front.

I’m not cutting ours at the moment because there are two families of birds nesting in it.

TeaKitten · 15/07/2023 16:12

Ineedsleepandcoffee · 15/07/2023 16:08

I should say it is not causing any problems to any pedestrians being overgrown as the cars parking there prevent anyone walking on the pavement there anyway. Not that there are pedestrians really.

Do people not get out of the cars? These are pedestrians. Your hedge is overgrown in your words, just cut it.

Littlefish · 15/07/2023 16:14

I would cut it, but I would also either speak to or send a note to the neighbour telling them to stick to cutting their own part of the hedge in future and not yours.

megletthesecond · 15/07/2023 16:17

It's nesting season. I'd leave it for a few weeks.

SoupDragon · 15/07/2023 16:18

Does the extra metre improve visibility for him pulling off his drive or something like that? i mean, he shouldn't really do it but he might have thought "they usually trim it so it won't matter if I just do this not..."

as to whether you should cut it, cut it when you want to. Don't waste time thinking about whether or not you've been "shamed" into it.

Anewuser · 15/07/2023 16:23

Your child’s been in hospital so spend your time with them and don’t worry about the hedge. It’s called priorities.

Even though it’s been cut, give it a few weeks and it’ll be overgrown again, due to this weather.

Cut it when you’re ready and on your terms. I really wouldn’t worry that he’s cut the front, he’s just saved you a job. No one cares if you haven’t cut your side.

theGooHasGone · 15/07/2023 16:25

It's fairly simple, clearly the neighbour was fed up with waiting for you to do it so just went and did it. The fact that you didn't do it but still care about it "looking like you were shamed into it" speaks volumes. Cut it if you want to, don't if you don't!

senua · 15/07/2023 16:33

I was intending to cut the hedge when I got a chance but I have a lot of other constraints on my time and quite often there is a car parked on the pavement blocking the hedge
So many excuses. You finally have a chance and ... you invent another excuse!

Just go and do it. You'll feel better once it's done.Smile

Jongleterre · 15/07/2023 16:38

Cut it. Once it's done it will look lovely and it's something that needs doing and is done and out of the way.

Silvered · 15/07/2023 16:50

Hope there are no birds nesting in there.

It's your hedge. As long as it's not causing a nuisance at the front then cut it when you're ready.

Original poster
Ineedsleepandcoffee · 15/07/2023 16:55

TeaKitten · 15/07/2023 16:12

Do people not get out of the cars? These are pedestrians. Your hedge is overgrown in your words, just cut it.

Show quote history

No as the driver side is clear at the road side

OP posts:
Original poster
Ineedsleepandcoffee · 15/07/2023 16:57

The question is a bit pointless at the moment anyway as I've gone out and there is a car parked over it, so can only do the inner side

OP posts:
Iwasafool · 15/07/2023 16:58

Silvered · 15/07/2023 16:50

Hope there are no birds nesting in there.

It's your hedge. As long as it's not causing a nuisance at the front then cut it when you're ready.

My hedge needs cutting but there is a bird nesting in there so it has to wait. The hedge looks scruffy but it is lovely watching the birds going in and out and I can't wait to see the babies.

Silvered · 15/07/2023 17:02

Iwasafool · 15/07/2023 16:58

My hedge needs cutting but there is a bird nesting in there so it has to wait. The hedge looks scruffy but it is lovely watching the birds going in and out and I can't wait to see the babies.

Show quote history

Both of mine do as well. I tend to do them late September when the second flush of nesting is out of the way. I can hear cheeping coming from one of them currently, but not sure what's in there - and I don't want to look to closely for fear of scaring Mum off!

Original poster
Ineedsleepandcoffee · 15/07/2023 17:02

SoupDragon · 15/07/2023 16:18

Does the extra metre improve visibility for him pulling off his drive or something like that? i mean, he shouldn't really do it but he might have thought "they usually trim it so it won't matter if I just do this not..."

as to whether you should cut it, cut it when you want to. Don't waste time thinking about whether or not you've been "shamed" into it.

It doesn't effect visibility, looking at it again I can see why he has done it as lines up with the bit that borders his driveway. I'm sure there was no malice in it and I don't like to look messy so I will do it once I get a chance when there isn't a car in the way.

OP posts:
TeaKitten · 15/07/2023 17:03

Ineedsleepandcoffee · 15/07/2023 16:55

No as the driver side is clear at the road side

Show quote history

So they never have passengers?

Original poster
Ineedsleepandcoffee · 15/07/2023 17:03

Iwasafool · 15/07/2023 16:58

My hedge needs cutting but there is a bird nesting in there so it has to wait. The hedge looks scruffy but it is lovely watching the birds going in and out and I can't wait to see the babies.

Show quote history

I will of course check for birds first and if there is any nesting it can stay messy.

OP posts:
Original poster
Ineedsleepandcoffee · 15/07/2023 17:04

TeaKitten · 15/07/2023 17:03

So they never have passengers?

Show quote history

Generally not and if they did they would let them out before parking or maybe not block a pavement themselves.

OP posts:
TeaKitten · 15/07/2023 17:07

Ineedsleepandcoffee · 15/07/2023 17:04

Generally not and if they did they would let them out before parking or maybe not block a pavement themselves.

Show quote history

So you don’t actually no then. Anyway glad to see you’ve realised you were BU with thinking the neighbour was shaming you.

KnittedCardi · 15/07/2023 17:12

DH had to cut the front off our neighbours as he can't see past it safely to turn out of the drive. Perhaps this is a problem for your neighbour too?

Our neighbour doesn't mind at all.

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