To ask someone to come with me

[Beachbreak2411]

Hi!
so - I have a bit of a history of alcohol abuse and recently I’ve got so much better!!

however. Last week at work I was erroneously accused of smelling of alcohol and sent home by my manager who my boss has already said “she finds it hard to work with you” (because I won’t let her bully me or the others). I have a meeting scheduled with her and her deputy (who is also her friend and they spent quite some time together today during our shift). Who can I bring with me to this meeting who will ensure things are fair?

your union rep?

I work in hospitality.. don’t have one!

Please someone advise! This woman has bullied me for quite some time and has been trying to make me quit. I worry this is her firing me.

A colleague that you trust or someone from HR?

all the people I trust are junior staff and she is vile to them too. We have HR once a month and she’s not due for a while. I’m happy to pay someone to come, lawyer etc as she’s a bully and fed up with her doing this!

How long have you worked there? Have you received a formal invite to disciplinary meeting? If so, does it say that possible outcomes are upto and including dismissal?

https://www.unitetheunion.org/campaigns/unite-in-hospitality/

Not too late to sign up to a union and ask a rep to come, you'll find they will back down a bit if you have a solicitor or union rep present.

I don’t think the union will get involved in this issue. I was under the understanding you had to have joined before the problem occurred.

I’ve worked there2 years. No formal notification for a disciplinary but an email announcing a meeting discussing “my absence due to condition” with another staff member stated being there as a witness. They are close friends so not very unbiased!

Check out acas's website. I think they'll be able to advise

Thank you. I’ve message that link thank you!! I do not want to go into this without someone on my side. This woman is vile. I’m a bigger lady and she won’t order me uniform in my size as apparently it’s too difficult. She laughs at me that I’m always too hot (overweight and perimenopausal and run around what’s pretty much a greenhouse restaurant over the sea in full sun) she finds it funny I’m always sweating and uncomfortable

A lot of unions won't help with cases/issues already in progress so get onto acas too who can offer advice for free.

www.acas.org.uk/disciplinary-procedure-step-by-step/step-2-following-a-fair-procedure

This page shows what they should be doing if they're looking to give a discipline sanction. It'll be useful for you to read up.

In regards to asking somebody to attend with you, the below is what acas says. So you can ask them about bringing a legal rep but they don't have to allow it

Who the employee can bring with them
The employee must choose their companion from one of the following:
• a work colleague
• a workplace trade union representative who's certified or trained in acting as a companion
• an official employed by a trade union
Under discrimination law, employers must make reasonable adjustmentss_ for disabled employees. This might mean allowing someone else to attend, for example a support worker or someone with knowledge of the disability and its effects.
Employers can, but do not have to, allow companions who do not fall within the above categories. For example, some employment contracts might allow for a professional support body, partner, spouse or legal representative

Or can I tell her to just F off??

I don’t think that would be productive.

You need up establish of this is a formal disciplinary. If it isn’t a disciplinary meeting, there is no right to be accompanied, although you can ask.

A history of alcohol abuse but recently better?

What does that mean? Are you abstaining or in AA?

Were you under the influence and this is a wake up call?

There are plenty of hospitality jobs at the moment and you could leave and get another quickly but that won't help an underlying drink problem

Thank you. That was rather tongue in cheek but your advice isgoodx

Take a colleague. Deny any drinking. Be polite and calm throughout.

Thank you. I don’t know what colleague to take. It’s a pretty horrible work environment and my superiors are awful and colleagues are so bullied I wouldn’t want to jeopardise their jobs x

What is the position of the boss who made the comment about the manager? Are they someone who could be involved.

Hm. If you really want to keep the job, and definitely didn’t smell of alcohol, I’d be tempted to take an employment solicitor with you, or at least ask one for advice about how to handle this. I agree it would be unwise to attend the meeting alone.

But in the circumstances you describe it sounds to me like you need a fresh start elsewhere. Personally f you’re being bullied and lied about at work, I’d focus on trying to build a constructive dismissal case against them so you get some money out of this.

Other staff who were working that day say I didn’t smell. It’s well known tho manager hates me and it’s a bit of a running joke how she treats me

is it possible to get witness statements from the other staff?

Have you posted about this before? (I assume a prior "accusation" if this recent one was only a week ago)

It sounds familiar.

Have you ever been caught drinking at work?

Unite is the major union for hospitality workers in the UK.