Do you clean as you go along?

[Boymamabee22]

One big tidy at the end of the day or as you go along?

Husband and I can't agree on the best way to tidy. I think it's better to clean as you go (also stops me getting overwhelmed) but DH thinks it's ridiculous to clean every mug after we've finished with it or put stuff away that we're going to use again later. Says I'm a million miles per hour and I need to slow down. To be fair, I do actually have ADHD and cleaning as I go alone (albeit sometimes obsessively) is the only way I avoid getting overwhelmed by mess. Also, I lose stuff all the time and it's worse when the house is a mess. DH has a photographic memory and knows where everything is, despite how messy he is.

I've tried being more relaxed about the house these past few days and now our house is a total tip and I'm frozen on the sofa feeling overwhelmed and about to have a meltdown. Toys, dishes, and laundry everywhere. No food in the fridge and I can't even focus on what we need.

Hi @Boymamabee22 - I don’t have any tips re cleaning/tidying but if you’re feeling overwhelmed can you go and sit in the garden and make a list of what needs to be done ? And then go back in and tackle one thing at a time ? Good luck

I'm more like you but in practice I can't keep on top of it all so our place isn't as tidy as I would like.

I do find mess overwhelming though and it's tough when others around you don't get it

Tidying is done as we go along. Whole household agrees (husband & adult children, sadly dog not so much). Kitchen sides & hob are wiped down after each use and kitchen table is wiped after meals. We have a cleaner once a week too which really helps.

I do it as I go. I’d rather the jobs didn’t build up. Just find it easier

We are a middle ground. Let a few cups collect in the sink and do the dishes maybe four times a day. Let some toys get spread about if they're going to be used again later. Would swill a basin or sink with water after using if it had visible bits or hair in it, but wouldn't actually clean it with spray every time.
Both you and your husband sound extreme to me!

Cleaning ?! What's that? 😲

I tend to prefer one big clean rather than as I go. Neither of you are being unreasonable - as long as both of you are pulling your weight it's best not to argue about how / when it gets done!

I like to clean as I go and expect others in the house to do the same. Partly because at the end of the day I usually cook so someone else cleans up and I don’t think it is fair to leave everyone’s mess for one person to clean.

I tidy and clean as I go. Can't stand messy worktops and cluttered sinks. My partner is the opposite then once in a while gets a bee in his bonnet about tidying up and wants to blitz the place which I hate.

Another minute here and there to wipe things down and put away means you don't need to allocate a whole day to industrial clean!

I've hated chaos all my life and do my best to avoid the need for it. Don't put things down, put them away. 😊

If cleaning as you go makes you less stressed then do that.

The only time it becomes an issue is if you expect someone else to do the same or if you spend so much time cleaning that you neglect other parts of your life that you usually enjoy.

Somewhere in the middle.

Some stuff and some times I do it as I go. Other times and other stuff, I do it during a specific cleaning session.

No way I'd be cleaning every mug after use, though. It would sit on the side until the next dishwasher load.

It's the same conversation in our house and it's why I don't work from home any days!

My DH a has always been remote and he's "end of day" I wake up and feel itchy and hate being home when it's mucky.

My ideal would be do everything as I go along or get up spend 10 minutes giving the place a fresher up, put stuff away, bins out wipe work tops and set off the robot. Then relax and work.

My DH is all day, crumbs, grill, stuff left out, dog bowls on the floor, cushions all wonky and squished.. dog fluff everywhere, not major major muck but just lived in.

So end of the day he cleans.. but then he makes a drama out of it.

He refuses to change so I just work in my office and can be totally unaware if the mess.

Yes, this is us too. Stuff that can be put away and will stay away, I'll generally do at the time, but stuff that's going to reappear or can be done in a more efficient sweep at end of day I do then. Particularly with kids I think cleaning up absolutely everything as you go is more work than it needs to be, as it inevitably ends up coming out again and you end up just making work for yourself.

I tidy as I go although I’ll leave a mug or cup out if I know I’ll use it later. It’s the only way I can keep on top of things otherwise I feel stressed

Clean as you go. Tidy and re-set lounge before bed.

Keep floor spaces clean too by vacuuming regularly. Makes a big difference even when surfaces get cluttered.

I don’t wash up every time but we’re not a huge household so breakfast dishes get stacked in a bowl & washed up with lunchtime snack plates. Saves water. I only use dishwasher occasionally.

Do what a PP has advised. Step out into your outside space, deep breaths, make a list and do what seems most important to you, first.
You’ll be fine. Nobody’s going to judge you.
You can only do your best and that’s absolutely fine.