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Original poster

Party is it wrong to have invited work friends?

22 replies

Cheeseandwineisprettyfine · 11/07/2023 00:13

I have a special birthday upcoming, and after not wishing to celebrate (been finding life tough), I decided last minute to hold a party at home. (At home as dd is SEN and new places/loud environments without a break out is too much for her), I sent out a txt invite to friends, family and some work friends including my own team… today my boss bluntly asked me why I would want to spend my birthday with my colleagues, I was already feeling a little nervous about hosting a birthday celebration, and now I feel like it’s a odd thing to do? Is it? I just wanted to have a gathering and to have a little celebration of my birthday , and have tonight contemplating cancelling.

OP posts:
Hellodarknessmyoldpal · 11/07/2023 00:18

Do you consider your colleagues friends? I would invite mine if i were having a party. Your boss sounds quite rude. Enjoy your party 🥳

Whattheactualwhatnow · 11/07/2023 00:19

Maybe your boss was making a joke? If you are friends with people at work then no problem inviting them to your birthday do.

ChaChaRealSmooth · 11/07/2023 00:19

I’d invite one person from my team as they are genuinely my friend and we socialise outside of work, the rest I wouldn’t as they are firmly just colleagues. Your boss was being rude.

have a great party!

Hawkins0001 · 11/07/2023 00:26

@Cheeseandwineisprettyfine why not, besides when they get more loose lips, then secrets start to spill, in theory

Thisismeyeah · 11/07/2023 00:27

I take it you want them there as you asked them. If they come great, if not just party without them and dont ask again.

Dont cancel

WandaWonder · 11/07/2023 00:45

Whattheactualwhatnow · 11/07/2023 00:19

Maybe your boss was making a joke? If you are friends with people at work then no problem inviting them to your birthday do.

I would take it as this rather than add somw back story that is probably not accurate

My bosses are human who joke like we do about bosses

TiaraBoo · 11/07/2023 01:00

You see these people everyday, of course you’ll make friends with some of them! It’s normal!
I invited some work colleagues to my wedding and birthday parties.
Maybe your boss doesn’t want to be friends with colleagues, that’s fine too, but weird they can’t see other people are different.

EBearhug · 11/07/2023 01:46

I've been on holiday with people from work before, and not only have they celebrated my birthday with me, one of them had his wife bake me a cake once (no one had made me a birthday cake since I was a child.)

Equally, I know others who have nothing to do with colleagues outside of the office, but if you want to, it's fine.

Muckysmucky · 11/07/2023 01:50

You can invite who you like to a party!

Have any of them accepted?

Glitterblue · 11/07/2023 01:51

We both had quite a few of our respective work colleagues at our wedding and I've made some really close friends through work so I'd say it's totally normal. You spend so much time with these people, you're bound to get on well with some of them.

DaisyQuakeJohnson · 11/07/2023 01:56

I've always been friends with colleagues. We've attended each other's parties, weddings, etc. Enjoy your party. I'm sure your boss was just joking.

Original poster
Cheeseandwineisprettyfine · 11/07/2023 06:58

yes, a few have accepted, like I said it was a last minute decision..
we often have socials in and out of the office.

i don’t want to cancel, before I had my Dd on last special birthdays/events I held parties at venues but now that’s not fair on her so why it’s at home.
it was a odd comment, she did ask if she should bring anything! 😂
maybe I read it wrong.

OP posts:
Ladybug14 · 11/07/2023 07:22

I like my work colleagues but I wouldn't see them as friends, so I wouldn't have invited them ..... but I think, if your colleagues are also friends, then inviting them is entirely reasonable

Mommasgotabrandnewbag · 11/07/2023 07:25

Did the boss get an invite?

MasterBeth · 11/07/2023 07:29

You are being unreasonable to consider cancelling because of a stupid comment by your boss. Invite who you want.

MRex · 11/07/2023 07:30

Cheeseandwineisprettyfine · 11/07/2023 06:58

yes, a few have accepted, like I said it was a last minute decision..
we often have socials in and out of the office.

i don’t want to cancel, before I had my Dd on last special birthdays/events I held parties at venues but now that’s not fair on her so why it’s at home.
it was a odd comment, she did ask if she should bring anything! 😂
maybe I read it wrong.

It was clearly a joke, your boss is even coming along. Put it out of your mind, except that you need to consider sense-checking if you find you often take jokes literally.

ChildrenOfRuin · 11/07/2023 07:31

Of course it’s fine to invite work friends.

Many people make friends with work colleagues.

Original poster
Cheeseandwineisprettyfine · 11/07/2023 07:36

Mommasgotabrandnewbag · 11/07/2023 07:25

Did the boss get an invite?

Yes! Of course. We all have other social times together

OP posts:
Original poster
Cheeseandwineisprettyfine · 11/07/2023 07:37

MRex · 11/07/2023 07:30

It was clearly a joke, your boss is even coming along. Put it out of your mind, except that you need to consider sense-checking if you find you often take jokes literally.

Show quote history

Thanks for your feedback, yep you could be right sense checking may be needed. Got a lot going on and thought it would be a nice idea to bring together people.

OP posts:
Willmafrockfit · 11/07/2023 07:43

have a great party
just a mis firing joke by the sound of it

mondaytosunday · 11/07/2023 08:44

Maybe your boss doesn't have any friends at work so can't imagine socialising with them? I'd have said 'yes of course they are my friends'. As I assume your boss wasn't invited maybe they are miffed!
My work friends WERE my friends for most of my adult life. I had drinks with one last night - we are both over 60 and haven't worked together for over 30 years.

LakeTiticaca · 11/07/2023 09:16

Most of the people I call friends are either current or former colleagues. Even job I have had there has always been official/unofficial parties and staff nights out . Its never occurred to me as being strange!!
Your boss probably meant it as a joke .
I've hosted a few parties at my house over the years and always get massive anxiety about it, but everyone always turned up and had a great time!!

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