A few details changed to try not to be outing. It’s a bit long but I’ll try my best to be concise! I’m feeling a bit irritated at my DPs best friend from uni (I’ve no plans to say anything to him, more looking to vent and to see if I’m overreacting!)
DPs best friend of about 7 years got married this week. Very short engagement as couple in a hurry to live together (from a different culture where they were not allowed to live together before marriage).
DP has been heavily involved in the planning as well as helping friend pick out suits etc. Has had lots of phone calls and meet ups for advice from planning to engagement to the wedding itself etc.
In conversations between them and also some with me too he would always say that dp was coming to ‘The Wedding’ (and very apologietic to me as they really limited numbers and did not invite friends partners unless married, I didn’t mind as we have a young baby).
The only reason DP was not the best man (or equivalent of in their culture) is because friend has a brother and friend told him this several times.
As a result DP spent a lot of money (about £600!) on a fancy suit thinking that he was attending both the ceremony and celebration as essentially part of the wedding party (I suppose like a groomsman). He also got them quite a lavish gift.
The invite gave an address (which didn’t indicate if it was a place of worship or a party venue, it was just a street address!) and again said invited to ‘the wedding of x and y’ and have no indication that the ceremony and celebration were separate or that he wasn’t attending the ceremony. The only hint was that the time was very late in the day but we put that down to a cultural or personal preference thing.
Anyway, he shows up to the venue, cost an arm and a leg to get there as it’s quite far away from home. Turns out the ceremony happened earlier in the day. Then ropes dp into helping setup as all of grooms family and other friends were late. Then the celebrations couldn’t begin properly without the bride who was two hours late and who, as part of their tradition had to go round to every guest and be blessed (this is the word dp used, not sure how accurate that is though) - which meant it was supposed to be at 6, didn’t start until 8, but didn’t start properly until 9 and they only had the venue until 10.30!
AIBU to think my partner has been (however unintentionally) led on somewhat?
YABU your partner should have clarified.
YANBU the groom seems like a bit of a cf.