AIBU getting angry at dh for pretending to give baby sip of beer?

[Mcface]

He's done it several times, holding the glass towards baby for pretend sips saying 'glug glug glug'. I find it really upsetting, although may be over reacting. He said he wasn't actually giving her beer, that I'm always nitpicking and need to get some rest. We have people with alcohol issues in our families, I just can't see the joke.

Seriously?

Unclench!

I can see both sides. But if you have alcoholics in your family OP, it is understandable this would touch a nerve. I can't bear to hear about people taking cocaine for similar reasons (and it's just gross for the human cost of a "fun" night out). So I do get it. If you've explained this to your DH, he should take your feelings on board.

Gosh I genuinely couldn't find energy to get worked up over this even with alcohol issues in the family.

Is he accurate when he says you're always nitpicking because honestly f you react like this regularly over such minor things then it doesn't sound like you trust him with her at all.

Yabvu. Motherhood is going to throw way worse at you than this. Don’t sweat the small stuff.

This is why I needed some outside perspective, as I think I have some quite significant ppd or anxiety going on skewing my judgement.

Well, it is quite childish but as he’s not actually trying to give your baby any alcohol, I think I would ignore it. He is not causing harm to your child and you can’t control every interaction he has with your her to ensure it is to your liking. So, I would say you should tell him you don’t think it’s funny, but I wouldn’t chose to have a huge fight over something like this. And then ignore it completely. There are probably things you do that annoy him too, after all.

I very much doubt your husband is planning on giving your child alcohol for a long, long time- and if you really think he would give a baby or young child alcohol I would wonder why you’re with him/have children with him.

On one hand I feel like you're overreacting, but if it is upsetting you he should be willing to stop doing it.

Even if you found it funny in the first place, it's the kinda joke that would just get annoying after a while anyway.

If it upsets you then he should stop doing it. It's not like it's something that he needs to be doing.

He should be listening to you when you explain it's upsetting

I wouldnt find it funny personally. Its a stupid joke. But its definitely not worth getting upset over or starting an argument about. I can see why you feel that way about it but its a common joke people make with babies. Maybe when you are both sober and calm and the baby is asleep try and talk to him in a non accusatory way in a non angry tone... and just say 'look i know you were just messing about and didn't mean any harm at all and im not angry with you but as I've dealt with alcohol issues in my family I just found what you did triggering and got upset. It would really mean a lot to me if you didn't make a joke about alcohol with the baby again as I'm stressed and find it upsetting'
You may get much further in preventing him from doing it again if you talk to him like that and admit to being unreasonable. He probably felt defensive in the moment because you got angry with him about what is a common stupid joke.

I would pick your battles with this one. It seems like a light-hearted joke. Try not to stress too much.

To be honest it would make me cringe and I wouldn’t find it funny but I wouldn’t say anything and I’d be hoping ignoring it would make it stop.

I think just because others wouldn't get upset about it, then it doesn't mean you shouldn't either. We all have our different triggers, and if this is yours then your dh needs to pack it up. I know of someone who gives his baby gc the foam from the top of his beer. The baby's father hates it as he says baby gets a little alcohol too, but isn't in a position to challenge.

Yeah, I think yabu and need to chill.
my DF is an alcoholic and I’m quite uptight about alcohol and drunkenness but this is clearly a joke and a pretty common one at that.

I hope you're getting support for this.

So you should get a rest not him? Nice….
I also think it’s cringe, and doing this again and again to upset you is a really dick move.

I can understand the trigger if issues in family. If you have told him and he is ignoring I would not be impressed. Not all parenting is logical.

Once is amusing. Constantly doing it isn't.

I remember at a child's party a woman with a younger child showed off the younger child's 'party trick'.

The little lad couldn't pronounce 'bucket' and said 'fuck it'.

Her and a lot of other women thought it was hysterically funny and were encouraging the child to repeat it.

I didn't find it funny at all.

I find this tacky as can be, and immature. Neither DH nor I find it remotely amusing and call out his oaf of a brother on it every time.

I think its chavvy when men do this!

Wow... honestly pick your battles...

Boring joke but nothing to get upset over.

Honestly I do think yabu. I'm a pretty uptight non drinker myself and also have alcoholic family members. But I'd see the funny side of pretending to give the baby a glug of beer.

Presuming your dh doesn't have alcohol issues himself and isn't going to hurt the baby with the glass.

I've got a bit of a twisted humour though.