Nursery Mum

[Fab973]

So I had a very awkward thing happen at sons nursery. Another Mum came up to me (we were at a softplay) with a mutual friend and she said my som had been making her daughter so unhappy she didn’t want to go to nursery, she also said my son hit at her child.

i was totally horrified and that day asked the school teachers about it and to tell me if there was any hint of unacceptable behaviour from DS that I could address. They said it was completely untrue and my son is extremely friendly, popular and kind to other children. They also brought the other Mum in and set her straight.

The other Mum is totally ignoring me now if we see eachother at pick up or drop off or the park. How would you handle this from now on? We will be seeing eachother for the next 7 years in school settings. I am really annoyed she didn’t have the wit to fact check with the school before telling me my child is a bully

Every class has a loony Mum.
Ignore.
She'll quickly rub up the other parents and forget about you

Hope so 😬

They said it was completely untrue and my son is extremely friendly, popular and kind to other children.

How can they say this?

They can't watch every child all the time, so there could be a little truth somewhere along the line, even if it was just a quick spat between the kids, but enough to make the little girl not want to go to nursery?

It'll be something and nothing I'm sure OP, but perhaps try to put yourself in this woman's shoes. It's not nice when your child tells you something like that.

I'd see if it blows over and avoid her for now.

And branding her a 'loony' isn't fair either.

At the end of the day she's just trying to do the best for her DD, whose told her she's being hit by another child and she's so unhappy she doesn't want to go to nursery.

She should've gone straight to the teachers about it and not OP, but that doesn't make her a 'loony'.

I just start a conversation. Talk about something coming up at nursery/summer plans the weather. You dont have to mention what been and gone. Sometimes little kids come home with stories sbout whats gone on and to them its massive “little timmy knocked me over , i cried i dont like him i was sad all day long” when in reality it was an accident, little timmy helped her up and off they went playing. To us parents we think the worst but it was something and nothing 🤷🏻‍♀️

The way she doorstepped OP is really unacceptable though. I’d say she’s malicious but if posters think she’s a loony that’s fine, no one is saying it to the malicious mum’s face. Her doing ‘her best’ shouldn’t mean slagging off another child.

Bizarre on her side. She sounds like she was very stressed and upset and it all came out wrong. She is prob embarrassed at her behaviour.

Id be the bigger person and empathise with her because it IS hard to see your child upset and feel helpless. maybe ask if she got tp the bottom of it and make it clear you arent harbouring any bad feeling.
Its worth considering that Her DD might also have been practising lying 🤥

Are you reading a different thread to me?

Firstly, no-one was 'doorstepped'. The mum ran into the OP at soft play.

Secondly, no-one slagged off the OP's child. The mother said the OP's son had been 'making her daughter so unhappy, she didn't want to go to nursery and that he had hit her.'

So who was being 'slagged off'?

Thanks for the input all.

I did put myself in her shoes and it wasn’t so much what she said but where and how she said it. Then when I said I was going to speak to the school about it she said “no no don’t be silly” which made it even more weird. If it was me in her shoes and my child was being made to feel so upset they didn’t want to attend school A) I would be speaking to the teacher first but B) if the parent of said child offered to go to the school themselves I would be delighted.

the whole thing was just so off. And it was a few weeks ago and I found out she had spoken to a couple of other Mums about it too.

i don’t regret my actions at all it is just hard knowing in September we will have to be seeing eachother regularly and we saw eachother out a couple of times and she totally blanks me

I found school tricky when I was in it myself but I didn’t imagine I would be feeling that was again as an adult