Teenagers and bed

[TheFoz]

Looking for others perspectives. Three young teens in the house, one mine, two dh’s. Mine is sensible and will clean up after themselves (usually) when they make food. Will generally watch TV or be in their room.

Dh’s will be gaming or on the phone. Up and down the stairs, sometimes arguing. Making food in kitchen and not clearing up after themselves.

I’m kept awake with the noise of them, dh wears earplugs so their behaviour doesn’t effect him.

What’s fair here? What is a good cut off time for gaming and phone? Baring in mind they game all day long.

A bit more detail is needed as age dependant really, are they 13 or 19?

Either age they should be more considerate but cut off times age appropriate

They are 13-15.

13 is very young to be allowed to game when parents have gone to bed IMO. I have a 15-year-old and at weekends and in the school holidays I let him stay up a bit, but he has to be in bed by midnight. That's a new rule though and until about six months ago he had to be in bed by 11. During the week/term time his bedtime is still 11.

My 15 year olds devices all turn off at 9.30pm. He goes to be at 10pm. I occasionally let him stay up half an hour later if no school the next day.

No screens after 9 pm seems reasonable to me for a 15 y o. For a 13 y o I would remove screens at 8.

There needs to be quiet in the house when someone is sleeping so maybe from ten or maybe earlier if the 13 yo is going to bed earlier.

I'd also put time limits on kitchen use. No need for preparing food late into the evening.

What did you agree on before blending given that you parent very different?

After 10.30 I expect them to be quiet and will get up and say so if they’re noisy.
Personally I think no screen after 9pm for a 15 year old is quite harsh; my 15 year old doesn’t go to bed until 11ish but i do expect any mess in the kitchen to be sorted out by them

My kitchen closes at 9 so unless it is a pot noodle or a snack mine dont go in. After 10.30pm all should be in rooms not gaming as both have school but later rules for the weekend