Family court- first dispute resolution hearing- wrong to be so worried?

[Familycourt123]

So probably not really an AIBU but posting here for traffic. ExP has applied to court for visitation to our DD. We have the first dispute resolution hearing in a couple of weeks and I'm scared! I think the main reason is because I don't know what to expect, I've looked everywhere online and can't find much. Does anyone have any experience of how this works, i.e. are we spoken to separate or together. I'm stressing so much even though I know I'm not doing anything wrong.

I think it's the whole 'court/judge' thing that's freaking me out. I've never been in a court not ever stepped inside one so I don't know if that's scaring me. Can I go in with notes? Im worried I'll miss something that I need to say.

I was worried sick but it was honestly easier than I expected. I asked for a separate waiting area as my ex had been abusive (verbally) and I was scared of him. Not having to sit together helped.
I had representation which also helped, as my barrister and cafcass (court social worker) spoke to my ex and me separately and tried to reach an agreement between us before we even went into the hearing. Unfortunately that wasn't possible in our case as my ex was an addict and had turned up to court smelling of alcohol and so the actual hearing was very short as it became clear cafcass would need to do a s7 safeguarding report and this involved them talking in depth to both of us and our DC (individually) at a later date. Another hearing date was set for a few months later.
Just try and remain calm and factual and don't agree to arrangements you aren't happy with especially if you have any safeguarding concerns.
I was lucky enough to have been able to pay for a barrister after a critical illness payout but you honestly don't need one. There is such a thing as a Mckenzie Friend which is someone you can take in to accompany you, but they don't speak for you
I also found a few videos online of how the hearings usually go
Good luck

sorry, didn't answer your questions, yes you can take notes in, and yes you'll be in the room together but it is v informal and not like a court room on TV. Also we were never in front of a judge, it was a legal advisor first and then two magistrates for our final hearing. Our first hearing was in person and the the rest were done on the phone as this was in 2020.

childlawadvice.org.uk/information-pages/hearings-in-the-family-court/

Honestly it is not going to be bad. Unless something dreadful has happened you'll likely be before the magistrates and it's relatively informal. Just remember to be clear about what you want and if you are fighting against something, your reasons need to be super child focused. Focus on the important stuff and don't sweat the little things as otherwise you come across as picky and narky.
Even if you end up before a Judge, majority of them are fine.

Thank you both so much x