to ask for help about how to handle this?

[hmmoa]

Two years into a relationship (we had recently moved in together) I became pregnant unplanned. We had talked about having a family in future and moving in together was the next step in our relationship on the way to engagement, kids etc (or so I thought). We had been using condoms as I had been taking the pill but had horrific hospitalised food poisoning so was advised to double up contraception. However I became pregnant and it was a shock to us both. After some chats we decided to proceed and he said he would never want to push a woman into a termination and that he was excited about being a dad. When I was around 7 months gone, he started saying he wasn’t sure he could be a dad etc and I was obviously devastated. I moved out and DD is now 2 and he’s never met her.

I found out last weekend that he has told everyone we know that the reason he doesn’t see DD is that I tricked him into the pregnancy!! After everything he put me through he’s now suggesting I am capable of something so awful? I am so so so angry about it and can’t understand how he could be so vile? How do I deal with this?! I will never be able to know exactly who he has said this to but surely this is defamation?

What a turd. You can’t stop him saying it but you know the truth. You are both better off with out him, what a loser.

The prick is trying to make himself look like less of a deadbeat, he might be slinging mud on you but nobody with anything between their ears will think higher of him for being no contact with his child because of his little creative writing exercise. What a loser.

As Backstreets said this is about him trying to convince people he is not a shitty dad. He, very much, is a piss poor excuse for a father, and the fact he is saying these things just furher demonstrates he is a vile person.

I'm assuming he didn't tell you this, but it was someone else who told you what he has been saying ?
My advice, is when people are telling you what he is saying, don't get angry.
Say something like:
"what a vile man he is. Just when I think he can't sink any lower, he comes out with this shit. He is not worth my time. Thank fuck he is out of my life and I dont have to deal with him anymore"

Nobody who loves you and knows you will believe it. Anyone who does believe him, they are not worth your time.

What a prick.

If anyone mentioned it to me I'd just say "I guess he tells himself that to ease his guilt."

Agree. That's better than my suggestion.

Something similar happened to my friend.

Her DP’s mum told the darling manchild that ‘she’ (my pal) must have tricked him into getting her pregnant so she could trap him into staying and paying for her to sit at home with the baby…..

The old cow said it so much that he actually believed it. Prick.

It was all untrue. It was just an unplanned pregnancy because he didn’t put a condom on, not a trap.

My friend was a hard working professional woman who didn’t need to trap someone for money! Not that she got much. She got half his debt as they got married and he paid for nowt, they divorced and he stopped paying his half of all joint debt so she was liable. She’s still in debt.

Id be wondering if it was the MIL this time too persuading ger little innocent daddykins that it’s all ‘her’ fault ….