AIBU - do you check your child's phone? What age?

[Curiouscucumber]

My DS is 11, in year 6 and we have had a fair amount of phone drama on group chats. I'm surprised by the number of parents who never check their child's phone. I certainly don't check daily. Do check frequently when there is drama but try to step away. What do you think to checking phone, how often and until what age? I don't know but I assumed until maybe 15? There is lots to learn on social media etiquette, cyber bullying, etc. If you don't ever check, why not? Anyone taken their child off group chat apps?

Mine never got a phone till yr7
Phone was checked regularly
They were not allowed whatsapp or Snapchat at that age.
Phones left downstairs and overnight

Oh god you’ll get all kinds of weirdos who still check their 15 year olds phones on here.

My son is 11 and we gave him my old phone a few weeks ago to get him used to having a phone. We'll get him a better one before Senior School starts. He's one a few WhatsApp chats, which I do check every now and then - maybe every 2/3 days. Nothing too dodgy on it yet, thankfully! Me checking it was a condition of him having the phone. He's pretty sensible and isn't totally addicted to his phone, which is good!

I checked my sons phone until he was 13

my younger son is quite sensible and I don’t think would dream of joining any WhatsApp groups

I think by 14/15 even if you're religiously checking they're tech savvy enough to hide what they don't want you to find. I'd keep an eye on conversations for now but always stress the importance of being able to come to you for anything they find, send/ get sent

I check my kids phones, when they got them the rule was that they were left in my room overnight, they have to get permission to add apps (a notification goes to my husbands phone to approve) and I can check it any time I like. So far I’ve deleted TikTok and had a few conversations about bad language! I mainly do it because my kids have no street smarts and can be a bit naive. I’ll stop when I think it’s appropriate, probably after some time at upper school because I think that’s when a lot of kids mature a bit.

My son is 12 and in Y7, and he only has a phone on the condition that it is subject to regular checks

He knows that if I ever find anything vaguely nasty on there (Whatsapp groups with kids being cruel about others etc...) then he will have any group chats banned, and if caught again then his phone will be taken away.

The checking will remain in place until the end of Y9. I guess once in Y10 I will have to trust him to make the right decision, but he will be aware of consequences if I find anything of the contrary!