Husband waking me up!

[PUER125]

I am an insomniac, rarely getting more than 3-4 hours sleep.
Yesterday, I was awake from 3am. I was reading in bed and fell back to sleep at 8:30.
I was woken up at 9:00, by my husband coming in to the bedroom.
"Oh good, you're awake" he said. "I'm just going to hoover through upstairs".
He was still hoovering at 10:00, not just floors, but curtains, skirting boards, and even the cornices.
I was not best pleased!
Later he asked if I was cross with him, and if so, why.
I told him he had woken me up. He denied this and said I was already awake.
AIBU in thinking an apology would have been nice, even if he was mistaken about having woken me?
Should I LTB, or is this a patio job given my extreme lack of sleep?

I understand the lack of sleep is frustrating but you’re being unfair. You need to communicate with your partner. When he said he was going to Hoover you should have said “I actually didn’t sleep much last night and am trying to get back to sleep, could the hoovering be left until later”.

You're expecting him to read your mind or to know how much or little you’ve slept while he’s asleep himself, which is unreasonable

I say he’s entirely in the wrong. I’d be furious if my DH woke me up by coming into the bedroom. He knows you have sleep issues, why on earth would he come in when it’s silent,,presumably you’re asleep? I absolutely wouldn’t disturb my DH if he was still in bed.

Mmmm, I have mixed feelings on this. Assuming he knows you struggle with sleep, it does seem a bit unfair. BUT... on the other hand, if he wanted to get on with the cleaning, 9am is not an unreasonable time to do that as a general rule. And he may well have woken you up by coming into the bedroom but I think I do that to DH fairly often - I'll come in quietly at a point at which he's almost ready to wake up on a Saturday when he's having a lie in, and I'm never sure if I've woken him or if he's been half awake for a while (it's 10am at this point, not 6am!). Of course, with DH, he can go back to sleep in about 3 seconds so it's not an issue and he always insists I DIDN'T wake him, but I have doubts!

You should have told him you were tired and asked him not to do the hoovering.

Bit silly to lie there seething with him for an hour instead of just communicating with him, imo.

All you had to say was, "Please don't vacuum right now, I need to sleep some more." You then, after you were up, should have had a talk about him coming into the bedroom while you're still sleeping, given the insomnia issues you deal with. Your husband isn't a mind reader.

A DH that spent an hour hoovering “not just the floors but curtains, skirting boards, and even the cornices”
You lucky girl. Hang on to him!

This. To the letter.

As I often say to DH, "you don't get a medal for being a basically OK human".

I sympathise as I don’t sleep well. But I do try to stick to ‘normal’ awake hours to not perpetuate the insomnia and to try and not mess up my body clock even further. I can’t believe you read from 3am - 8.30am. I’d have given up and got up about 6!

If I have a bad night my DH wouldn’t dream of tiptoeing around until what 11am? If he woke me at 6.30/7 I’d be annoyed but any later and that’s just normal awake hours. There’ll be cars, dogs barking etc.. For my own good I get up at 7.45 at the latest.

I’m also impressed he was doing the hoovering. So no I wouldn’t be cross at hoovering at that time.

9am on a week day is acceptable IMO.

My being awake from 3 am is a regular thing, and I would usually be up long before 8:30. Once I am awake, I am wide awake so telling him I was tired and wanted to go back to sleep was a non-starter.
He didn't have to Hoover at that time, in fact his normal routine is to watch the news over breakfast, and start to get going at about 10:00.
I did get up when he started hoovering, and started some other chores.
Him doing a good job with his vacuum brushes and crevice tool doesn't make me a lucky girl, it just means I have taught him well. I have failed at teaching him how to cook, and how to fold laundry though!