I split with my ex at the start of the year but promised that I would stay involved with my mother in law. She is a lovely lady and not totally blind to her son's faults.
Her son is generally cooperative but he gets drunk and moody and sends me semi abusive messages. More about wanting to know what I've been up to when I don't reply to him or if want him to look after the kids for a night he will sort of hang it over my head/ not fully confirm. I tend to block him until the days before contact, he can call the kids directly if he wants.
Despite me initially trying to keep MiL involved, contact has slipped. She sees the children every weekend with her son. However she keeps asking to see me too, go on day trips etc. I don't mind but now I only have one day with the children I like to see my family and friends, or do housework or have a lazy day. So I try for once a month. As for Sundays, due to her son's resentment of me ending the relationship, I will not subject myself to going with them on a day trip. I did it once. It makes me too anxious and I'm a worse parent because of it.
She also keeps using our time together to try to convince me to give it another chance. She says that he's changed (he hasn't) that he's sad (undoubtedly true but no intention of making things better for himself) and that I don't understand depression.
I don't want to end things with her but I feel that I need to take back some control. I also feel that she is telling my ex that I'm open to reconciliation, which I definitely am not. I worry that by me still being involved, I am sending a message that things aren't over, and that we're still a family.
I've already stopped messaging her so much, which she commented on. She asked me outright why we don't see each other more and I didn't know what to say but I find myself less and less inclined to be available when she keeps bringing up her son and the ending of the relationship.
I'm sure some of you have been in similar awkward situations.