Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wish my neighbour would keep their garden nicer

47 replies

GesticulatesWildly · 01/07/2023 18:53

We both moved into our houses within 6 months of each other, about four years ago. They are council properties, and we both rent. They are a nice family generally, and we help each other out in a neighbourly way. They both work but both have flexible hours. I honestly like them, but oh my god, their garden. There are huge piles of bin bags, old bikes, a rotting sofa, broken toys and dog poo everywhere.

They have three young DC who don't get to play out because it's clearly not safe or clean. They cut the grass they can get to every so often but there are huge stabby thorny things that come through the gaps in the fence into my garden which requires weekly culling on my part so that my kids don't hurt themselves on them. Their grass is currently about a metre tall and is also coming through the fence which irrationally incenses me.

My garden isn't posh, but it's safe and clean for my DC and I do make the effort to keep it nice. I'm looking into putting some sort of mesh situation up on my side of our shared fence so I can stop getting so annoyed about it but it frustrates me that I should have to spend money because they can't be bothered, and it upsets me that their kids can't play out (I have invited them round to play at ours loads over the years and they're always pleased to come).

It's also part of the tenancy agreement to keep your garden tidy but if I ring the council to complain, they'll know it was me and it would destroy what is a nice neighbourly relationship. I'd offer to do it for them, but I don't have time (3 DC, 1 FT job 0 partner).

AIBU to be annoyed about this? WWYD?

OP posts:
Beginningless · 01/07/2023 18:57

YWBU to do anything about this. It’s up to you if you want to get annoyed, your right to feel how you feel, but I think your energy would be better spent elsewhere.

stephaniezanoni · 01/07/2023 18:57

I'd put up some sort of fence so I didn't have to see it. Annoying but you can't force them to tidy the garden and as you said if you get on then going to council will make it awkward.

Mommasgotabrandnewbag · 01/07/2023 18:57

Well that sounds horrible. Especially the dog crap. It must stink out in your garden in summer. I'd make a complaint if it were me, but I don't give a shit about neighbourly relationships.

DiscoDragon · 01/07/2023 19:13

The dog crap is horrible I agree, but as to the other stuff perhaps with their jobs and family gardening just isn't a priority.

I don't have the time or energy to keep on top of my garden, it's hard enough keeping on top of all the things I've got to do inside of my house every day! I don't have any grass to cut but my borders are full of weeds and the fuchsia bush is taking over the decking. If my neighbours don't like it they are quite welomce to stop looking into my garden.

Original poster
GesticulatesWildly · 01/07/2023 19:19

DiscoDragon · 01/07/2023 19:13

The dog crap is horrible I agree, but as to the other stuff perhaps with their jobs and family gardening just isn't a priority.

I don't have the time or energy to keep on top of my garden, it's hard enough keeping on top of all the things I've got to do inside of my house every day! I don't have any grass to cut but my borders are full of weeds and the fuchsia bush is taking over the decking. If my neighbours don't like it they are quite welomce to stop looking into my garden.

Yes, I've thought about that a lot and tried to be understanding that it's just not a priority for them (or they basically lack time). It's more that I have to go round checking my own garden every few days for thorny stabby things coming through the fence and am going to have to spend money on mesh to stop them from doing so. I don't make a habit of looking in their garden other than to despair

OP posts:
bridgetreilly · 01/07/2023 19:31

If the thorny stabby things are plants, mesh won’t stop them. Save your money.

mumda · 01/07/2023 19:33

Environmental health are your friend.

Catspyjamas17 · 01/07/2023 19:37

Sounds like they have got a bit overwhelmed with it and don't know where to start. I might ask if they wanted to borrow my strimmer, if I could fit it tactfully into conversation.

CindersAgain · 01/07/2023 19:39

If the spiky things are weeds, say thistles, then if you weed kill the top then the whole thing dies.

Original poster
GesticulatesWildly · 01/07/2023 19:40

bridgetreilly · 01/07/2023 19:31

If the thorny stabby things are plants, mesh won’t stop them. Save your money.

Oh really? They are deffo weeds. Any idea what I could use to keep the buggers from coming through the fence?

OP posts:
Original poster
GesticulatesWildly · 01/07/2023 19:42

CindersAgain · 01/07/2023 19:39

If the spiky things are weeds, say thistles, then if you weed kill the top then the whole thing dies.

I wonder if I can stealth-spray them with weed killer through the night

OP posts:
Reugny · 01/07/2023 19:43

Weed killer.

And as PP report the dog poo to environmental health. Though you could wait until after a hot day so it is less obvious it is you.

Original poster
GesticulatesWildly · 01/07/2023 19:44

I've tried that @Catspyjamas17 they just say they can't be arsed 🤦🏼‍♀️ I admire their candour, if nothing else

OP posts:
Badbudgeter · 01/07/2023 19:44

GesticulatesWildly · 01/07/2023 19:40

Oh really? They are deffo weeds. Any idea what I could use to keep the buggers from coming through the fence?

Show quote history

I’d get rolls of bamboo stuff that sits tightly together so it’s a physical barrier . Also because I give no shots I’d get tall bamboo So you can’t see their garden. If they ask it’s to prevent the weeds / Thorns growing over the top.

usererror99 · 01/07/2023 19:49

If you rent not own - ie a potential neighbour dispute you'd have to declare on selling - report them they sound disgusting and lazy

Trollfeet · 01/07/2023 19:49

I had council tenants living next door to me and reported because they had built a mountain of dog shit that I could smell at the back of my house with the windows shut!

I did mention it to my neighbours before I reported it and they told me they would clear it in 3 weeks. I reported it the same day and it was clear 2 days later.

Starlightstarbright2 · 01/07/2023 19:54

Have you thought of mentioning the thistle type thing . I had to do this with my neighbour with a nettle plant it was sorted in 2 minutes

Unicorn34 · 01/07/2023 20:00

Please be careful with the weed killer if they have a dog

FofB · 01/07/2023 20:03

You can buy a weed killer gel that you paint onto the leaves and it carries it down into the roots and kills the plant.

JMSA · 01/07/2023 20:06

Offer to do it, and that will hopefully mortify them into taking action.
Your offer need never materialise if they don't.

JonahAndTheSnail · 01/07/2023 22:34

YANBU. Life has got on top of me the past couple of years, so my garden's not the best kept, but I prioritise not letting weeds grow through to the neighbours. I couldn't imagine not picking up dog poo each day. Next door has a mountain of abandoned junk at the bottom of their garden, which backs onto mine. It's now so overgrown that the weeds hang over the 6 foot fence and are pushing it over. There's also rats nesting in it and last summer when they attempted to cut the hedges, I ended up with rats in my house for a few weeks which was fun!

DdraigGoch · 01/07/2023 23:15

CindersAgain · 01/07/2023 19:39

If the spiky things are weeds, say thistles, then if you weed kill the top then the whole thing dies.

Not with the weedkillers you can buy these days. You can't get glyphosate any more and the new stuff is hopeless.

LunaTheCat · 01/07/2023 23:28

Poor you.
I think things like keeping long grass under control and not leaving rubbish in garden are part of a social contract in people who live very close together.. most of UK 🤣.
I would be direct and ask nicely and if no response I would report … is keeping garden part of your council tenancy agreement?

MrsMikeDrop · 01/07/2023 23:34

I think you should say something about the dog poo

Alphabet1spaghetti2 · 01/07/2023 23:39

@GesticulatesWildly I sympathise. We live next door to a similar garden, which they are having a good go at turning into steptoes yard. Unfortunately we do have to cross it to take bins etc out, down a shared alley, which is the only place their dogs pee and poo - and it’s not been cleared up since January…grim is the only word to describe it.
We did try and help them last year by clearing the garden etc but they’ve not bothered to keep it up. They both work from home and are in good health and in their 20s. Their parents seem to think we should keep doing it for them and are cross we aren’t! We are in our 60s and both work nights…… some people are just cfs.

Swipe left for the next trending thread