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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Returning to the workforce after mat leave

7 replies

londongirlinaus · 01/07/2023 16:28

Hi,

We are due with our second child later this year. We are very fortunate to already have our first in a daycare that we love and it is likely that we will get spots for our second too.

I currently work 4 days in a role that I really enjoy but with the costs of daycare my partner and I find ourself in a bit of a debate about my return to work after mat leave.

My partner works full time in a job which financially means I don’t have to work and from an economical point of view would save us $15,000 ish a year if I didn’t return to the work force until our eldest starts school in a couple of years. Whilst he realises, our income is joint we will essentially being paying $300 extra a week for me to work.

I realise, some would be very fortunate to be able to be a stay at home Mum whilst their children are small but this is just not me. Whilst I am in a job that will never earn a 3 figure salary I have always envisaged working in some capacity but I will never break even it seems with childcare even if I went back 2 days and we will still be paying more in fees for me to actually go to work. I seem to just be on a losing streak here despite mentioning my own career, super, mental health etc.

Any advice would be much appreciated. Thanks.

OP posts:
swanling · 01/07/2023 16:31

Why are you paying childcare costs on your own?

Pension? It's not just lost contributions but lost growth on those contributions, which by retirement age will be significant.

Don't base life altering decisions on flawed maths.

pinguins · 01/07/2023 16:32

Hi OP I'm in a similar boat. 2 in daycare and I'm working 4 days a week. My childcare costs £200 more than I earn each month. The reason I'm working is because I will be a couple of years further along with my career and have those extra years of work experience in this role, meaning I will be 2 years closer to payrises/promotions/getting a better paying job/moving into management.
I don't know if that helps you but I'm trying to think long term.

pinguins · 01/07/2023 16:35

Why are you paying childcare costs on your own?
If she stays home childcare is an expense they will not have as a couple. 🙄

TeaKitten · 01/07/2023 16:36

Why would you be paying £300 a week extra for you to work? That would mean your childcare is £300 a week MORE expensive than a full time salary, that doesn’t make sense.

Does he earn more than you?

londongirlinaus · 01/07/2023 16:38

Correct! Thank you! This is his view….

OP posts:
lawke · 01/07/2023 16:39

If work is part of your identity, you should should continue regardless of the financial costs. There is a value in providing your children with access to early years education and social contact at nursery, and your own social contact and sense of self-worth even if the costs of nursery are higher than your salary. I have had my dds in nursery since they were 12m whether I was working, doing unpaid internships, or study. Never earned enough to cover the full childcare cost but it was worth it as they had a brilliant time and I got to fulfil my needs.

Rewis · 01/07/2023 16:49

Can you afford the cost of £300/week extra?
I am slightly confused how childcare costs your entire full time job salary and £1000+/month. But if you want to go back to work and you'll get pension and benefits and ca afford the extra cost then it might be worth it just for your own mental health and career development.

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