Have any lone parents got the perfect work/life balance?

[theresalwaysguineapigcurry]

Work full time with two primary aged kids and feel like I'm constantly chasing my tail. Got home from work at 7 and then there's washing, washing up, homework. I rarely eat tea as I cannot stop to cook.
If I cut my hours (which I can't afford anyway) I think I'd be equally stressed as these things are pretty much daily tasks.
Weekends are just as full on apart from Sunday when they're with their dad and sometimes I catch up, but rarely. Sometimes I go out or see friends and would feel miserable sacrificing this to stay in and do housework.
Help!

I work 3 days a week spread over 4 to facilitate school runs. DS2 has additional needs and has to be dropped off/collected despite being in secondary school. There is no childcare available for my younger DC either (childminders fully booked with waiting lists and none pick up from his school anyway and no after school club) so I don't have the option of outsourcing this. So I can't do full time as I wouldn't have the flexibility I need. I am always chasing my tail. I have the kids 100% and I don't get enough sleep (autism = sleep thief). I'd love to be able to work less but we need the money.

@NeedSleepNow
It sounds like you are trying really hard...
You probably know this but the 14yr old can't have the same routine as the 6yr old so plan around that. The older one has the 'privilege' of staying up a little later so perhaps they can take on some more responsibility. The littlest one needs a bedtime story but the oldest won't so you'll need a routine that will work for you in their different ways.

Also, after school activities every day? That is definitely going to leave you with no time to be on top of things.
Someone upthread mentioned something about not doing it all. I second that. You can't do it as though they had 2 parents and a nanny at home. Will it be possible to reduce the after school things so that they can spend time just resting and catching up on life while you do the same?

It certainly isn't easy.

3 days a week here with teens. Never had overnight help. DD has MH issues so I still need to support her, I hope I can work full time when she finishes school.
Life was easier when they were primary age, routines all went out of the window with teens. 3 different meals a day too thanks to allergies and beige food requirements.
I don't think there's ever a one size suits all routine for lone parents. We can plan all we want but it doesn't suit every child.

@insideoutsider we have after school activities 3 nights a week, Fridays is the latest finish which I don't mind too much if everyone is a bit later to bed that night. No activities at weekends thankfully!

My oldest obviously gets himself sorted for bed each night, but he has a habit of getting up a lot to go to the loo, get a drink etc. I think the problem is that he doesn't get that tired in the evenings and wants to get up and have a chat! My 6 and 10 year old go to bed at the same time each night. I did try getting the youngest to bed first, then my daughter after but that made bedtime even longer so they both go up at the same time and I read them a story together and then youngest goes to sleep and 10 year old reads for bit to herself.

I also try to help my teenager with homework in the week as his confidence has really taken a hit since starting secondary school and he worries that he can't do the work a will get it wrong. Usually with a lot of reassurance he is then fine, but this takes a lot of time in the evenings too.

For me it is definitely not possible to be everything to everyone all of the time and have a pristine house, cook from scratch every night and have time to myself!