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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To feel used

4 replies

1to10andstartagain · 29/06/2023 16:34

So firstly I'm in hospital recovering from an operation so feeling a bit fed up .

Had visitors and lovely messages and feeling the love . But obv lots of time to think .

I was friendly with another mum friend of my Dd aged 15 .let's call her V. Girls not particularly friendly anymore , no fall outs but just drifted . We were couple friends with another couple for many years ,camping trips , days out ,holidays etc .

When Vs mum died suddenly her Dd came to our house one night after school for years to help with after school
/ work commitments. No problem . We were friends and I was ok with this .

Girls then went to different schools .

The friendship between us has drifted too although my husband and her husband still get together regularly, drinks , walks , weekend breaks etc .

I give her daughter a lift to sports practice one night a week she brings my Dd home though I don't need her too it was arranged by husbands and I drive out of my way while she drives past our house . I also have a younger to take to different clubs that night so it's a tight squeeze. I'm not dependent on help to drop back .

Anyway I'm feeling pretty hurt because I've heard nothing from her , no good luck nothing !
Last night sports coach cancelled because of injury . She sent a message saying hope he got better soon ,wishing speedy recovery etc

I've been in hospital 2 bloody weeks and nothing .

I've told my husband that he shouldn't volunteer me to help until checking it's not going to muck things up .
And I'm tempted to say that I feel used by helping this couple when I don't even get a text saying get well soon .

My husband works away in the week so he can't do clubs etc .

Am I being too sensitive

OP posts:
19lottie82 · 29/06/2023 17:07

It would have been nice for her to text you but as you said, you’re not really friends anymore?

Your DH arranged the lift share with her DH. If you don’t want to do it anymore then don’t.

ComeTheFckOnBridget · 29/06/2023 17:12

Yanbu but also probably taking it to heart too much. Heard of the post op blues?

1to10andstartagain · 29/06/2023 17:14

Def know I've got post op blues
And too much time to think
Yes we not close friends anymore but if someone helps me out I always make a point of being appreciative.

OP posts:
ComeTheFckOnBridget · 29/06/2023 17:44

You both have different standards, which probably contributed to why you're not friends anymore.

It's OK to feel hurt but don't dwell, end the picking up routine when you're home. That's it, job done. Now what you need is something to distract yourself. Have headphones? Time to find something light & funny to watch before a post-op nap.

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