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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To take bottles and formula into hospital even though I want to breastfeed?

147 replies

Giltedged · 29/06/2023 08:10

Last time I ended up taking bottles and some formula as everyone said I should. Had a horrible birth and fainted so didn’t get skin to skin and DH gave our newborn baby some formula. I’ve no idea if that contributed in some way but failed miserably to breastfeed.

I don’t really want to buy newborn feeding bottles and formula - feels a bit like failure before I’ve begun. Equally I don’t have much confidence in my ability to breastfeed and don’t want to starve my baby! What should I do? Hmm

OP posts:
ahandmaiden · 29/06/2023 08:12

I breastfed my baby and really struggled, ended up triple feeding and burnt myself out, I too was unwell after birth. Next time I will combi feed and not put so much pressure on myself (hopefully!). It's completely your individual choice but I will take formula next time and I won't feel bad about it 😊

ChocHotolate · 29/06/2023 08:13

If you take it, you will almost certainly use it.

PurBal · 29/06/2023 08:13

I gave birth a little over a week ago and had this conversation with one of the midwives. It was her view that if you intend to breastfeed not to take formula in: they have it if it got to that stage. You can also harvest colostrum syringes to cover the eventuality that you can’t feed.

All of that said: you didn’t fail. You fed your baby and you will do the same this time.

Laiste · 29/06/2023 08:13

Do what makes you feel comfortable and reassured. Seriously.

If you feel that having a back up will put your mind at rest a bit re feeding your new baby then, honestly, you're more likely to relax about breastfeeding because it's not a make or break situation.

Flowers

I've had successes and failiors with breastfeeding my my 4. Please don't let this issue spoil your special time x Baby will be fine either way.

Nordicrain · 29/06/2023 08:14

I woudln't take anything in if you want to bf, and just see how you get on. BFing is hard work in the beginning and if there are bottles there I suspect you'd use them in the whole birth fog. In an emergency your hospital will have formula or your DH can pop out for some.

Original poster
Giltedged · 29/06/2023 08:14

ChocHotolate · 29/06/2023 08:13

If you take it, you will almost certainly use it.

I didn’t last time (and starved the poor thing!) this is my worry really!

OP posts:
Anoushkaka · 29/06/2023 08:15

A bit of topic but does the hospital not provide you with bottles and formula during your stay?

GreenMini · 29/06/2023 08:17

I will get flamed for saying this but if you have bottles and formula on hand, it's too easy to use them. Ergo, I wouldn't get them, it will encourage you to persevere. I'm not saying persevere indefinitely, just to get over that "late night, I'm so tired I could cry and my nipples are hurting" moment.....
If you do need them, there not many places in Britain where you can't find a supermarket to buy them within a few hours.

WeightInLine · 29/06/2023 08:17

Isn’t there a thing against putting feeding issues into AIBU? It’s not really the place for them and people get hella mean/upset.

inkblink · 29/06/2023 08:17

I took some in second time, after struggling to breast feed first time. It made me feel calmer knowing I had a backup. Didn't use it, ended up successfully feeding for 2 years! If it makes you feel better, take it with you.

Original poster
Giltedged · 29/06/2023 08:17

I’m not sure, possibly. But you’d have to ask and it isn’t always easy getting the attention of the staff (I’m not being critical, I know they are busy.)

It’s so hard. I think because psychologically it feels like once I buy formula and bottles I’m admitting to myself I’m going to fail to breastfeed. But then I’m also sort of expecting to fail to breastfeed!

OP posts:
Original poster
Giltedged · 29/06/2023 08:18

It wasn’t like that for me though @GreenMini , I think I’d have been OK with that. It was just we couldn’t do it at all, he wasn’t able to latch on and so wasn’t getting any milk. I feel so bad, he must have been really hungry.

OP posts:
Usernamenotavailab · 29/06/2023 08:19

I didn’t take it.

figured if the worst happened dh could bring me some in. Plenty of late opening supermarkets around.

as it happened i breastfed successfully. I still had midwives offer me formula every few hours “feeding again? Do you want formula? Give yourself a break”. Became really annoying. One saw me breastfeeding then gave me a massive row for not bringing formula, as how did I know I’d be able to breastfeed?

Laiste · 29/06/2023 08:20

Maybe ask yourself why you are putting breastfeeding on such a pedestal in your mind OP?

Your baby will be fed either way. Kindly :)

It shouldn't be causing this much anxiety. The fact that it is for you is what makes me feel you might be better taking a back up. OR have it at home for DH to bring in if it all goes (excuse the pun) tits up! That way you have the back up but it's not right under your nose, iyswim?

Original poster
Giltedged · 29/06/2023 08:20

WeightInLine · 29/06/2023 08:17

Isn’t there a thing against putting feeding issues into AIBU? It’s not really the place for them and people get hella mean/upset.

I don’t know, not that I am aware of. But the thing is that if you put it in infant feeding you tend to attract extreme views on both sides, where more nuance is needed.

I do understand it’s contentious though, it’s something that I am finding difficult to even think about.

OP posts:
Laiste · 29/06/2023 08:22

Usernamenotavailab · 29/06/2023 08:19

I didn’t take it.

figured if the worst happened dh could bring me some in. Plenty of late opening supermarkets around.

as it happened i breastfed successfully. I still had midwives offer me formula every few hours “feeding again? Do you want formula? Give yourself a break”. Became really annoying. One saw me breastfeeding then gave me a massive row for not bringing formula, as how did I know I’d be able to breastfeed?

Gosh! When and where was this!?

beetsbearsbattlestargalactica · 29/06/2023 08:22

I didn't buy any formula or any bottles as I was told that if I had them I'd use them.

There was a time in hospital that she wouldn't feed and the midwife expressed some of my colostrum into a syringe to give to her which worked well! Other than that she was a fantastic feeder, didn't have any chapped/cracked nipples I was very lucky!

HRTQueen · 29/06/2023 08:23

You are not going to fail

feeding your baby is what is most important

maybe take them so you yourself know they are their if you are really struggling

we all know breastfeeding can be hard but not breastfeeding or only breastfeeding isn’t failing please don’t be so hard on yourself some of us couldn’t, some mix fed and I bet we all now wonder why we fretted so much over things didn’t work out quite are we planned

Totallyconfusedperson · 29/06/2023 08:23

I didn’t. I had horrible complications after my second so had to have CT scans and couldn’t breastfeed. Hospital has ready made formula available and you can cup feed a newborn

beetsbearsbattlestargalactica · 29/06/2023 08:23

Also my midwife said to me to express some colostrum to take into the hospital so if they need it- like when you fainted they can give that to the baby instead.

I took some and they froze it then just expressed some fresh x

Original poster
Giltedged · 29/06/2023 08:26

Stupid question but how do you express colostrum and how/where do you store it?

OP posts:
HelloUtrecht · 29/06/2023 08:27

I took some in just in case and ended up not using it. Better to have it and not need it, rather than need it and not have it.

Nordicrain · 29/06/2023 08:28

Usernamenotavailab · 29/06/2023 08:19

I didn’t take it.

figured if the worst happened dh could bring me some in. Plenty of late opening supermarkets around.

as it happened i breastfed successfully. I still had midwives offer me formula every few hours “feeding again? Do you want formula? Give yourself a break”. Became really annoying. One saw me breastfeeding then gave me a massive row for not bringing formula, as how did I know I’d be able to breastfeed?

My DD was given formula in hospital against my will - well I was told if I didn't consent they would ask the doctor to consent - In hindsight completely unnecessarily. My BFing support wasa midwife grabbing my breast and stuffing it in DD's bruised mouth and when that, surprisingly, didn't work stormed off saying she didn't have time for this.

Hospitals don't really support Bfing in RL. Despite all the "breast is best" stuff that's out there.

MaxwellCat · 29/06/2023 08:28

I've had 4 children and never took any in

Original poster
Giltedged · 29/06/2023 08:29

That was my experience too @Nordicrain Sad

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