AIBU to give up my secure job and take a leap of faith?

[MyTruthIsOut]

I work in the NHS, in a skilled field and I fucking hate it. I don’t usually swear which shows how much anger fills me when I think about my place of work.

To be clearer, I absolutely love my specific job role and the service I provide but the NHS is broken and the department I work in seems to be crumbling to the floor.

Many staff are unhappy and rates of stress-related sickness are at an all-time high and staff retention levels are at an all-time low. The whole environment is so toxic. There was once a time where I would cry in my car on the way to work because I couldn’t face the day ahead, and I certainly wasn’t the only one 😢

I have been in my current role for 2 years but I’m now broken. The unrealistic expectations of me and my service (alongside all the other shitty things that come hand in hand with working for the NHS) have destroyed me.

Me and DH have spoken endlessly about how unhappy I am and he can see the physical and emotional affect that work is having on me and he said he would completely support me if I felt I wanted to leave. I’m currently off sick and initially the idea of leaving my career broke my heart, but as the weeks are passing I now feel very strongly that I don’t want to go back there as I just cannot face it. It’s a broken system full of emotionally broken staff.

Thankfully due to the specific nature of my role there is the option to work on a self-employed basis but it would mean starting from scratch : a one year Uni course to obtain specific qualifications, followed by all the difficulties that arise with starting up a business…..which I don’t have a clue about!

As dreadful as being an NHS nurse is, at least I know I have a stable job and a good pension, whereas leaving it all behind to try and set up my own business will have to be a massive leap of faith.

I’ve been a nurse in the NHS for 17 years and it’s all I know, but it is so unbearable that I can’t bear the thought of going anywhere near my place of employment again.

Had anyone else taken a leap of faith like this and just started all over from scratch again?!

And I would really appreciate all honest replies about the difficulties and realities of starting up your own business.

Thank you.

After 17 years in the NHS I have reached the end. The deterioration in the quality of care that can be provided (down to staffing alone) is shocking and stress and anxiety amongst staff is so high that the whole environment is demoralising. I just don’t want to be there anymore.

I don’t even feel sad at the thought of losing my nursing registration. I could go back and do the odd Bank shift to retain my qualification but to be honest, I don’t want to step foot inside that place ever again.

So I’ve got to wait out my notice and then my training starts to begin the process of becoming self employed. Its going to cost about £2k in total and it will be a year until I can start practising (due to course completion and exam dates) and then I’m going to give it my everything.

Me and DH have sat down and crunched out the numbers as to how we cut back to make up for 12 months of me not bringing any money in, and we feel like this is my chance to do what I’ve been scared to do for years. I’ve fully got his support and w hi Kat my job is causing me to feel at an all time low it’s the perfect opportunity to just go for it!

I told one of my distant Managers last Wednesday that it was my intention to leave and he said he’d let my two direct managers know that afternoon so they could phone me and discuss it further, and I didn’t hear from either of them and still haven’t.

In the NHS we are all “just a number and we can all be replaced” (I’ve actually heard senior management say that about nurses) so I don’t owe them anything.

Hi OP, I just wanted t check in on how you are getting on? I’ve also been broken by working in the NHS and am trying to get out permanently.

Can I ask what you are training in?

Best of luck with it all.