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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

So are these school shoes or trainers

422 replies

Shoesortrainers · 24/06/2023 07:04

School have published their amended policy from Sept. This style is showed as unacceptable as they apparently trainers.

Er no they are school shoes and they
are the ONLY ones that fit my wide footed , high instep child. Believe me we’ve tried and tried over the years. They are just like me unfortunately. Plus sensory issues too.

School shoes must also be black and of polishable leather (they are!)

School refusing to budge. In fact the teacher dealing with uniform is being very rude and obstructive.

So Mumsnet are these shoes or trainers.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
12
WomanFromTheNorth · 24/06/2023 07:35

Why don't schools spend more time worrying about what constitutes good teaching and learning rather than obsessing over school fucking uniform. The whole system needs an overhaul and all the drongo SLTs need weeding out. This is one of the reasons I don't teach anymore.

Oliotya · 24/06/2023 07:36

UndercoverCop · 24/06/2023 07:31

I would expect them at primary school but not secondary.
Primary school shoes are like trainer shoe hybrids to get little feet used to wearing proper shoes. By secondary I would expect proper shoes, which seems to be what the picture from the school shows.

The bottom pair in this picture would be comfortable

What is a "proper shoe"? And why exactly do children need to be wearing "proper shoes"?

PimpMyFridge · 24/06/2023 07:37

Our school provide pictured if examples of what they mean when they describe the shoes you can/can't have. These would be in the no category.
But if you have sensory issues I'd speak to the senco lead as they could be classed as reasonable adjustment.

Original poster
Shoesortrainers · 24/06/2023 07:37

UndercoverCop · 24/06/2023 07:31

I would expect them at primary school but not secondary.
Primary school shoes are like trainer shoe hybrids to get little feet used to wearing proper shoes. By secondary I would expect proper shoes, which seems to be what the picture from the school shows.

The bottom pair in this picture would be comfortable

Tried similar. She couldn’t get her feet in.

We have tried many retailers over the years. Look at Clarks H fitting size 6. Most of the styles are like the school I’ve shown with only 1 other style. Laces but also don’t look like they fit ( we will try them)

She can’t do laces yet either. She’s bright but struggles with co ordination and will get so anxiety and physically sick with worry on PE days.

OP posts:
CoffeeLover90 · 24/06/2023 07:37

Shoesortrainers · 24/06/2023 07:17

I’m not sure if this image will show up.

I agree the shoes you linked are shoes. But from this image it looks like they're saying no shoes with laces are straps. In that case, the shoes wouldn't be suitable.
Uniform rules are a bit crazy, imo. Specific brand of trousers, no names on pe trainers, no straps on shoes, no 'extreme' hairstyle (which in my area has been short back and sides)

ChildrenOfRuin · 24/06/2023 07:38

Have you tried talking to the SENCO to see if you can get him a uniform pass for the shoes on the grounds that it’d be a reasonable adjustment for his sensory issues?

I’ve got a DC with SEN at secondary school, and his SENCO will do that if a pupil with SEN struggles with an aspect of the uniform.

SeeingSpots · 24/06/2023 07:38

UndercoverCop · 24/06/2023 07:31

I would expect them at primary school but not secondary.
Primary school shoes are like trainer shoe hybrids to get little feet used to wearing proper shoes. By secondary I would expect proper shoes, which seems to be what the picture from the school shows.

The bottom pair in this picture would be comfortable

But this argument only works for the boys at this school. Not one of the girls shoes is a 'proper shoe' as you so bizarrely term it.

LostAtTheCrossRoad · 24/06/2023 07:38

OP try the men's Kerton Lace instead - it's a rounded toe box which is a generally roomier fit, and comes in a wide H fit (when we've got stock). The open Derby lacing style should give enough room over the instep. It starts in a size 6 too.

Daffodilwoman · 24/06/2023 07:38

They look like shoes to me.
I used to work on a school when it became an academy the rules about what staff could and could not wear were batshit.
Scorching hit and we were banned from wearing sandals and anything without a sleeve. Amongst other rules such as not being allowed to have dyed hair. I left.

coffeecupsandwaxmelts · 24/06/2023 07:38

The school aren't saying they can't be worn because they're trainers though.

They're saying they're not an accepted style of school shoe - two totally different things.

UndercoverCop · 24/06/2023 07:39

@Oliotya an adult shoe/formal office wear shoe that's what the school policy asks for.
I work in court regularly and have never seen an adult male in the shoes shown in the bottom row of that picture.
This school clearly has a strict uniform code, not all do, but this is what they want. It's not really about whether individual parents agree with it, those are the rules for attending there, if you don't like them find a school with a more relaxed dress code.

Original poster
Shoesortrainers · 24/06/2023 07:39

WomanFromTheNorth · 24/06/2023 07:35

Why don't schools spend more time worrying about what constitutes good teaching and learning rather than obsessing over school fucking uniform. The whole system needs an overhaul and all the drongo SLTs need weeding out. This is one of the reasons I don't teach anymore.

I’m planning on asking this teacher - a man in his early 30s - why he came into teaching and asking if looking down at shoes every day was what he invisaged when he signed up. Maybe look at the kids faces and check if they are happy instead and ready to engage in the school day. Give them a smile not a frown. It’s bloody sad!

OP posts:
HaveYouHeardOfARoadAtlas · 24/06/2023 07:41

I couldn’t tie laces till I was 14 or 15. I have dyspraxia though this wasn’t diagnosed at the time. Along with my undiagnosed dyslexia, asd and adhd! Chances are your dc with the sensory issues and laces struggle may have some sort of undiagnosed issue. But I get what you are saying about no support and no chance of a diagnosis.

Original poster
Shoesortrainers · 24/06/2023 07:41

LostAtTheCrossRoad · 24/06/2023 07:38

OP try the men's Kerton Lace instead - it's a rounded toe box which is a generally roomier fit, and comes in a wide H fit (when we've got stock). The open Derby lacing style should give enough room over the instep. It starts in a size 6 too.

Thank you. I have noted this style.

OP posts:
SeeingSpots · 24/06/2023 07:42

Shoesortrainers · 24/06/2023 07:37

Tried similar. She couldn’t get her feet in.

We have tried many retailers over the years. Look at Clarks H fitting size 6. Most of the styles are like the school I’ve shown with only 1 other style. Laces but also don’t look like they fit ( we will try them)

She can’t do laces yet either. She’s bright but struggles with co ordination and will get so anxiety and physically sick with worry on PE days.

Show quote history

Apologies I presumed earlier your child was a boy. As I said earlier if she was a girl which I now know she is from your update I'd be definitely pushing this further. The shoe choices for girls are bloody ridiculous and I would be pushing for her to be allowed to wear properly fitted shoes which will keep her feet dry and which are suitable for UK weather.

Patchworksack · 24/06/2023 07:43

Get her elastic laces for PE. My middle one has issues with coordination and although he can now tie laces at 13 (slowly and painfully) the elastic ones make life much easier for PE changing.

Testina · 24/06/2023 07:43

Notwithstanding that the rule is ridiculous…
And notwithstanding that they’re not trainers…

The school info you printed is not the school calling those trainers. The info is clearly about “formal” shoes.

I absolutely think these should be accepted - but don’t waste your time arguing over whether they’re trainers or not. The argument is whether they are formal enough - focus on that.

Lysianthus · 24/06/2023 07:44

Absolutely a school shoe. Email Clark's and tell them what the school say, and ask for their view to show the school.

Whinge · 24/06/2023 07:45

This school clearly has a strict uniform code... if you don't like them find a school with a more relaxed dress code.

The OP did that, the current school didn't have a problem with the shoes when her child joined, this is an ammended policy.

ChildrenOfRuin · 24/06/2023 07:45

She can’t do laces yet either. She’s bright but struggles with co ordination and will get so anxiety and physically sick with worry on PE days.

Theres a variety of different types of elastic laces available that get rid of the need to tie shoelaces, so it might be an idea to try some of those, if she’s not allowed to wear trainers with Velcro for PE?

LolaSmiles · 24/06/2023 07:46

Notwithstanding that the rule is ridiculous…
And notwithstanding that they’re not trainers…

The school info you printed isnotthe school calling those trainers. The info is clearly about “formal” shoes.

I absolutely think these should be accepted - but don’t waste your time arguing over whether they’re trainers or not. The argument is whether they are formal enough - focus on that.
Agree with all of this.
School aren't saying they're trainers. They're correctly saying that they are not formal shoes.

I'd focus try to find a pair, possibly from the men's range rather than school range, that's similar to OP's original one but with laces.

Testina · 24/06/2023 07:46

@UndercoverCop “those are the rules for attending there, if you don't like them find a school with a more relaxed dress code.”

That’s not a helpful point to many. In my area, you won’t get into anything but your catchment or have to drive your child an hour into city traffic to a failing school. And then even that failing school, like your catchment and ones in between, all have a similar shoe rule to this.

EatYourVegetables · 24/06/2023 07:48

The boys’ shoes on that picture from the school are awful, but the girls’ ones are the really offensive ones. Please tell me which ONE pair would be suitable to wear in December?? Bonkers school.

TheUsualChaos · 24/06/2023 07:48

Definitely shoes. DS wears a v similar style and they have been perfect for foundation stage. I'm getting the same again for next year. They are leather so can polish them up to look smart but comfortable and allow him to be active. Do schools not want children to be comfortable and independent? 🤷‍♀️

LaJolieMuse · 24/06/2023 07:48

One of the few good things about Scottish schools is that their uniform policies are not absolutely batshit.

They are school shoes.