Teaching my 1yo to use the stairs

[DownWithBreadsticks]

My husband and I cannot agree on this. He thinks I’ve made a major error, I think it’s sensible.

I have a 1yo. They crawl at lightning speed and cruise around happily but they’re not walking yet.

I have taught 1yo to climb stairs. I’m always always right behind them. They do it well. We’re working on climbing down.

Husband says that this is madness and stairs should always be met with a firm “no”. He thinks I’m inviting disaster.

I think that they’re always obsessed with stairs and it’s best to teach them properly. We do have stair gates.

I have done this with all 3, but my husband didn’t WFH with 1 & 2, so he wasn’t around as much to see. (I’m not a SAHM, but I work compressed hours to have a day at home with youngest on Fridays)

I have googled it, but I can’t find any definitive advice about stair-teaching.

What’s the MN consensus?

YABU: Stairs are so dangerous. WTF were you thinking encouraging a 1yo to climb them?
YANBU: Stairs need to be learned and the sooner the better.

I didn't realise this was something you might not do. DD2 is 13 months and has been climbing the stairs since just before she was 1. I didn't set out to teach her, but I didn't think it was something to prevent when I'm right there behind her.

When does your husband think they should go up the stairs? Because even once they can walk, they still crawl up the stairs for a while because they can't easily step up that far for each step without using their hands anyway. Does he not want them taught until they can properly walk up?

I don't think you need to teach as they learn themselves, but if you wantvto, teach them how to go down first.

I don't recall ever teaching mine to climb stairs, once he could crawl properly he was able to crawl up the stairs, I never thought much of it. Around 14 months he stopped crawling up stairs and started walking up and down them which I'm less keen on. He's 20 months now and I still hold his hand walking up and down but he's never had any stumbles.

Perhaps “teaching” was the wrong word to use. I have positively encouraged my baby to navigate the stairs safely whilst under my direct supervision.

My husband thinks this is irresponsible but I do not agree.

Always teach them to come down before you teach them to go up. That way there’s less likelihood of them falling.

I used to work in a nursery where the baby room was upstairs, all of the babies from about a year were taught how to safely climb up and down them, I've done it with both of mine at home too.

YANBU to let him or her climb under supervision. YABU to use that weird and awkward they/them form of writing.

DS is 13 months and an expert stair climber even though he hasn't yet mastered walking!

I don't think it really matters either way tbh. They'll learn to navigate stairs fine when they're older so I don't think you NEED to be doing this now but equally there's no harm in it. I guess it will be strengthening his muscles and coordination tbh. I think I started doing this occasionally with both my kids from being about 18m old. But eldest didn't walk until 16m and was a bum shuffler not a crawler. And youngest is 20m and only recently learned to walk as he has joint hypermobility and out toes really heavily.

We didn't have stairs in our house when my boys were babies, but my friend did, she taught all three of hers to crawl up them and come down them on their belly. My kids just copied her kids and all of them went up and down with no falling. She never had gates, I wondered about that at first until she showed me how they boys moved up and down.
When they got a little bigger they crawled up came down on their bottoms, one step at a time.

Did same with my Son and my 14mth old has been climbing them since about 11mths, we gave a gate at the top and bottom so it's only when supervised but they have to learn

We've never had stairgates. Mostly because our first house had 4 sets of stairs so gating would have been ridiculous and the house we had my second in has 2 non standard stair cases so we couldn't fit them. I taught mine as soon as they could crawl how to come down them. We have had 1 accident which was on day 2 in our new house which had a much steeper staircase and my youngest went down faster than they anticipated but no falls. I think it can work really well if you actively train.

Yes we taught stairs. Stair gates at top and bottom though so no unsupervised access!

If they are ready then they are old enough.

following them holding your arm out is the right thing to do.

Ask your Hb to ignore their age but explain why he does not agree with the child using the stairs.

We got DC to learn going up and down on bum. Seemed the safest way.

I did this with our kids, on their bum first and then when they were confident enough they usually started walking up and down them.

I taught my DC to use the stairs around the age of 1.

They crawled up and I taught then to bump down on their bum one stair at a time - cue a few years later and the bum method is still their preferred method of decent

I taught dd how to climb up down stairs at that age and I had stair gates for no unsupervised access.

The problem with your dh’s view of discouraging your baby from climbing the stairs with a firm no is that it could create anxiety around using the stairs in the future when he thinks they’re old enough. Then you could have an issue with your toddler being unwilling to use the stairs.

We had stairgates top and bottom, DD was taught to walk up holding on to the banister from 1 and bump down on her bum coming back down. Always with an adult behind/in front as necessary.

Blimey, your DH would hate me. DD2 has been a master at stairs since she could crawl. She now (age almost 2) refuses to let me anywhere near her when she’s going up or down - shouts STAY THERE MUMMY.

Ignore him and carry on as you are.

YANBU

We only used stair gates overnight, during the day all 3 of mine just went up and down safely!

At what point does your husband think they can use stairs?!

He's an idiot. Child will have to learn at some point and doing so safely as you have done is fine. My 1 year old was crawling up the stairs once she had mastered crawling and I taught her how to come down safely. We use stair gates and she was supervised. Once she confidently started walking she could navigate the stairs by walking up and down them.

We've taught our one year old the stairs, I would rather him know how to get up and down safely rather than falling.
Yes we have stairgates and he's never alone but you just never 100% know if somebody else is looking after them how close behind them they will be.
We've also taught him how to get inside and outside of the back door over the step.

Best advice ever from MiL was to teach him how to get down the stairs early.

We popped him halfway up and gently tugged his feet so he slid down slowly on his tummy. Obviously he paused at each step as knees and tummy catch on each step, so it automatically teaches control as they slide down.

Anytime he started to crawl up, he instinctively knew how to safely slide down because he learned that first.

Husband is wrong. Of course you teach dc how to climb up and down stairs.