I've always really struggled with warming to MIL. She's a person with no boundaries and doesn't care if she upsets someone. I always feel anxious going to her house.
I don't know what it is, but DD (11 months) has never been settled with her and cries hysterically every time MIL holds her. MIL has taken this very personally and always bangs on about how DD "doesn't like" her.
She now seems to have become obsessed with the idea that she can't give DD back to me when she's crying as she needs to "get used to her" and to hand her back straight away would be "spoiling" her. She literally refuses to give me my own child back. It is now at the point where I have to actually take DD from her. I've raised this with DH several times but he seems to take his mum's side saying that she "needs to learn" to be comfortable with MIL. I think this is ridiculous. If my child wants to come to me then she should be able to.
Yesterday was the last straw. MIL was holding DD and as usual, the crying began. It got worse and worse until DD was completely hysterical, panting heavily and screaming. She was holding her arms out for me and MIL said "no you can't go to mummy, you see her everyday". At this point I took DD from her and left shortly after.
When explaining the situation to DH, I said I do not want to go back to MIL's house again until she can assure me that she will give DD back to me if she wants me. DH thinks I'm being dramatic and is now saying that DD has an insecure attachment and echoed his mum's statement that I'm "spoiling her". Am I being dramatic for not wanting to go back there?
Just want to add, DD goes to most people. I don't know what it is about MIL that makes her so upset.