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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Parking at school pick up

75 replies

IncessantNameChanger · 21/06/2023 17:05

I parked up today on my normal street for pick up. School is two miles away and I need to be home in time to be there for my sons taxi drop off. Hence, I don't often walk to pick up only dropping off.

I parked on a cul de sac. Not blocking any drive. I did not mount any kerb. I was half a foot from the kerb.

Yet the man that lived in the house, walked round my car twice with his mouth hanging open staring at my car and his kerb. I looked at him with a wtf? Expression but got no reaction. So I asked him. He went inside.

His house is 20 years old if that. The school was built in the sixties. Yet he was looking very stunned and shel shocked. A parent had parked legally and consideratly on a public road 5 metres from a school boundary line ( top of playing fluid is one house and one public footpath from his boundary line.

Can anyone tell me what I did wrong? His jaw was on the floor. A very disproportionate expression for a taxed car to park on a public road. No parking restrictions, no dropped curb, no white line, no yellow line. My car was a good two foot back from the start of his 5 car wide drive. To hit my car he would had to drive over his Bush. A builders SUV was parked behind me. But with a man in who got no reaction at all.

I have spent the day sitting by my mums coffin and I would swop this man's shock and horror for my problems in a flash. Also why no use his voice? He was starring and starring at me and the car but could not verbalise wtf I was doing wrong.

OP posts:
CheshireDing · 21/06/2023 17:25

Some people are just dicks OP. If he can’t even use his words there clearly was nothing he could say

Our old neighbour didn’t like people parking outside his house, and thought he owned the road. He asked a workman we had round one day to move his van ‘because his adult child was coming back later’ . Adult child could have parked further up the road as a one off, adult child might have come back after the workman had left. He was a dick but thankfully he sold up

People definitely park like idiots outside school but if you were parked correctly he just needs to mind his own business

Avondale89 · 21/06/2023 17:28

Bharath · 21/06/2023 17:08

He obviously thought you’re a bit of a dick for parking in front of his house, instead of in an appropriate car park.

Yea because there are loads of them all conveniently located next to schools aren’t there!

DiaNaranja · 21/06/2023 17:29

Maybe he was admiring your car?

LunchBoxPolice · 21/06/2023 17:33

If you were parked legally then he was just being a dick. You can’t control who parks on the street you live on, no matter how precious you are about it.

BungleandGeorge · 21/06/2023 17:34

If it’s a public road and near a school then it’s pretty obvious people will be parking there legally. I’m guessing it was the half a foot away from the kerb

ActDottie · 21/06/2023 17:35

Probably sick of parents parking outside his house. I refuse to ever drive my kids to school.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 21/06/2023 17:36

I expect it was because you were so far out from the kerb! If you parked six inches from the kerb where I live you’d get alot of stares.

Original poster
IncessantNameChanger · 21/06/2023 17:36

VainAbigail · 21/06/2023 17:11

He probably thought your “half a foot from the kerb” was too far from the kerb, and he probably also didn’t want you to park outside his house.

I think he thought it was too close tbh and that was his issue with me. The leafs from his Bush was touching my car. If I parked a foot away I'd be narrowing the road for two cars to pass. I think the bush is purposely overhanging his boundary to stop anyone parking near his house. So why use his words and say no one is allowed to park outside my house? There are other places I can park but it's a resident street so everywhere is someone's boundary. To not park on a residential area its a A road and white lines.

There is no car park for the school. It was built in the sixties when everyone lived right by the school but over time it's been expanded and all the other hamlet schools have been closed.

I can't get my head round the level of shock that parents will park outside your house for a school that was there when you bought it.

OP posts:
Wimpod · 21/06/2023 17:40

Clearlyy his shrubbery shouldn't be right over the pavement to the road, but did it mean that no-one could get round said bush to pass on the pavement?

I8toys · 21/06/2023 17:42

I live next to a primary school. I know that I can't easily get my car out of the driveway around pick up and drop off time but that's what happens when you live there. You adapt your behaviour to the situation. Or I park my car on the street outside my house if I need to get out. The fact that he couldn't use his words was ridiculous. Passive aggressive bullshit.

SquashPenguin · 21/06/2023 17:44

I live close to a school. I’m one of six houses on the whole road, the rest is parkland, plenty of parking along the entire road. Everyday parents cluster around the houses instead, engines running. It’s irritating at hell.

He was looking at you because he’s sick of people parking there for the school.

Wimpod · 21/06/2023 17:45

Wimpod · 21/06/2023 17:40

Clearlyy his shrubbery shouldn't be right over the pavement to the road, but did it mean that no-one could get round said bush to pass on the pavement?

How I'm imagining it, in bad drawing form:

Parking at school pick up
BrieAndChilli · 21/06/2023 17:45

If you live 2 miles from the primary school do you not get free transport? Then you can be home for both kids being dropped off??

Fighterofthenightman1 · 21/06/2023 17:49

Probably thought he could intimidate you by just staring at you because you're only a woman and he's a scary man.

Then, when you confronted him he realised he's too much of a coward to argue with a confident woman and retreated back inside to safety.

MetalFences · 21/06/2023 17:50

ActDottie · 21/06/2023 17:35

Probably sick of parents parking outside his house. I refuse to ever drive my kids to school.

That's great that you don't have another child who for one reason or another has to come home in a taxi that you don't have to be back for. 🏆

However, the OP does.

LittleBrenda · 21/06/2023 17:52

BrieAndChilli · 21/06/2023 17:45

If you live 2 miles from the primary school do you not get free transport? Then you can be home for both kids being dropped off??

That's only if the schools nearer to you don't have a place. Not if you have chosen a further away school or you have moved etc.

CornishTiger · 21/06/2023 17:53

Sorry for your loss. You will be feeling all sorts of emotions at this time.

Ignore the grumpy man. You were parked perfectly legal.

I would park there daily from now on if I do wished and just smile and wave at any staring.

Malarandras · 21/06/2023 17:55

Don’t t worry about it OP, some people - lots actually - are just really weird. If there’s no parking restrictions you’ve done nothing wrong. If he doesn’t like living near a school he can move.

LlynTegid · 21/06/2023 17:56

So you live two miles away, reasonable to drive given the family situation you refer to.

Now consider most of the other parents who drive to and from school. I'd guess a majority live within walking distance, and only a minority can park properly.

So I can get his displeasure but he should have opened his mouth and spoken to you.

JustAnotherRandom · 21/06/2023 18:00

Sorry for your loss OP. I don't get people who think they have a right to the road outside their house. I get it might be annoying (I don't have off street parking either), but it's just one of those things, like getting annoyed at traffic if you live on a busy road or finding the noise of trains irritating if you live by a station.

PhoenixReincarnated · 21/06/2023 18:07

He couldn't say anything because the OP has done nothing wrong. If there wasn't room for a pedestrian to pass then that's on him not the OP. Maybe he was just in shock because the OP was parked legally and considerately 🤷🏻‍♀️

VisionsOfSplendour · 21/06/2023 18:22

There's a lot exaggeration in your post, its normal every stuff for people to get annoyed about school parkers outside housea even if they are prefectly entitled to be there

No one knows why this particular man did what he did but assuming you weren't blocking anyone or in the way I wouldn't give it another thought

Pickingmyselfup · 21/06/2023 18:23

I have a similar issue. I park legally and considerately outside of a house most mornings if possible and don't even take her "spot" because she's often leaving around the same time as I arrive but she still glares at me. I would put it down to it being one of those mornings but it does seem directed at me when it's more than once.

Unfortunately for her I'm not going to stop parking there if there is a space free. I drive because I either have to go to work or I need to be somewhere after school and I'm not one of those who sit with their engines running for half an hour (plus I'm electric) I park, turn off the car, get out and get the kids out. Walk 2 minutes to school, drop them off and walk straight back then leave by which point she's gone anyway.

I suspect she just doesn't like me parking there for whatever reason but nothing can be said so nothing ever has been and it's not likely to be directed at me personally.

Some people do park like idiots though, drives me mad to see people parked on double yellows or on the pavement just to save a minute of walking. I once got stuck trying to park because 2 cars had parked opposite one another which wasn't immediately obvious until I started to approach. I had to reverse back to the beginning and I'm shit at it so that was fun! Never parked there again unless one side was totally free.

Carry on parking where you are if you are legal and not obstructing anyone. It's his issue if it annoys him and it's only twice a day for as long as it takes to drop your child off/pick them up. If it wasn't you it would just be someone else anyway.

WeWereInParis · 21/06/2023 18:30

My advice would be to not park in a cul de sac as the residents have often specifically chosen that type of road to not have constant traffic.

People can still park there though. You don't get to specifically choose a road that others cannot park on, unless you buy on a private road. I do not understand people who have an issue with others parking legally outside their house, I really can't imagine why it would bother anyone.

And he bought a house near a school, so your comment that he wasn't expecting cars can't be right, unless he's an idiot.

Americano75 · 21/06/2023 18:34

He was being a knob. And if this hadn't happened when you'd just lost your mother then it wouldn't have annoyed you so much, because right now in the early stages of grief, the world can go fuck itself. Especially passive aggressive old knobs also certain cunty posters on this very forum.

Look after yourself, I'm so sorry for your loss.