To expect partner to put food away?

[KnackeredAF]

Pretty self explanatory.

I do 95% of the cooking. Last night as I was dishing up I put the leftovers in containers for lunch today. Leftovers contained rice.

I did some other jobs e.g. clearing up, bins out and then went for a bath.

I went straight into our room after the bath as baby had woken up and needed a feed (breastfed).

I woke up at 5am this morning and thought “shit hope partner is put the food away”. He hadn’t. He’d put the lids on and left them out all night.

I said this morning that he can take the food if he wants but it’s a bit dodgy as it was out all night, and that he could have put the food away as I’d clearly forgotten.

He now thinks I’m an arse.

AIBU?

Just for next time: you can put (small portions of) hot food straight in the fridge, you don't have to wait for it to cool to room temperature first. Better to get it chilled down quickly, in fact.

Thanks all for your responses.

I’m definitely carrying more of the mental load, because I always have done in our relationship (my love language is clearly acts of service) and at the moment there’s the age old story of him working, whilst I’m on maternity leave so the household tasks fall to me…

I’ve talked through this with my sister over the last few days and she’s provided some really helpful insights.

He’s a wonderful father who loves and dotes on his son when he can (works long hours). I love him very much, but sometimes it can be hard to work out whether I have 1 or 2 children 😂

Have a good day everyone ☺️

This is one of those fights that comes down to the fact you've got a baby and you're knackered.

He now thinks I’m an arse.

He's an arse.

I would start to address the balance now – otherwise what happens when you go back to work? It’s all too easy to fall into the pattern on maternity leave where you become the expert on the baby and the expert on running the house, but that doesn’t shift when you start work again. And then the feeling of having two children stops being “😂” and quickly becomes “😬” and “🤬”. A wonderful father doesn’t leave the mother of his children feeling as though she has to parent him too, or shoulder most of the burden.

I am surpirsed you are surprised at your husband's incompetence. They are all f'ing uslesss at the domestics, and as mothers we have to train our sons in domesticity as a courtesy to their future partners

They're not all useless. My MIL (who is wonderful) did train her sons up and frankly my OH is better at the domestic stuff than I am. Doesn't necessarily enjoy it any more than I do (ie not at all) but he does it.

He'd have put the stuff in the fridge or at least have asked. But then he'd probably also have cooked it (my cooking is... uninspired) and I'd have asked before putting it somewhere because I wouldn't have been sure whether it was going in fridge or freezer.

Judge rudy
You sir are the arse!!!if cooked rice is not cooled and chilled properly it can cause stomach upsets. It wouldn't have taken the ladies partner ten seconds to put the bloody stuff away!!! She's feeding their child!!!!!!

Bloody hell, did someone just resurrect a 4 month old thread to go on about how much better than them their husband is at domestic stuff 🤣

If you mean me, I didn't realise it was an old thread 😅