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Original poster

Can a 4 month old baby play alone?

55 replies

Sistersisterrr · 20/06/2023 18:45

I am at home with my 4 month old baby and feel like I’m constantly on the go and trying to entertain them and exhausted. We do walks, classes etc - all naps are contact (trying to move to the cot) and play time on a mat / mobile.

When my husband is in charge he makes it look easier - baby in bouncer facing away from the tv or a cloth over the mobile so the baby can’t see the screen and he chills and watches cricket / football. He says our baby needs to learn to be independent.

Is that lazy or would it be OK if I did it too? I don’t just mean for 10 minutes while I do a load of washing but to watch a full tv show? I’d feel so guilty but not sure if I am being OTT.

OP posts:
NuffSaidSam · 20/06/2023 19:11

They don't need to played with constantly at this age. In fact it's necessary for their development that they're not constantly entertained. They need time to explore on their own terms.

I don't think you're being OTT facing the baby away from the TV though. I think that's the best option. The baby should be facing you.

I don't really understand the phone issue? Surely if your DH is looking at his phone the baby can only see the back of the phone anyway?! The screen is facing your DH. You probably don't need to put your baby in a tent lest he see the back of a phone. That is slightly mad!

GoodChat · 20/06/2023 19:12

A 4 month old is fine seeing football on the tv while in their bouncer OP, don't worry.

That little tent for the play mat is cool though. You could make that a little sensory den.

Cucucucu · 20/06/2023 19:13

Off course tye baby can play on his own , baby gyms , tummy time , they find they hands entertaining . As long as they are supervised at all times .

gogohmm · 20/06/2023 19:15

What do you think you get siblings do! My friend is on her 3rd, most chilled out baby ever because he's just left (safely whilst she get on with life, certainly no entertaining or contact naps. I only had two and my second was definitely more chill than the first

violetcuriosity · 20/06/2023 19:15

They can have screen time. YouTube Miss Rachel and have 15 mins to blow dry your hair and do your makeup.

You're welcome.

🤣

mindutopia · 20/06/2023 19:17

😂My first literally watched daytime tv allll day for a few months, because I was literally sat on the tv feeding her all day for a few months. She watched a lot of Jeremy Kyle in that time. She is perfectly clever.

SouthLondonMum22 · 20/06/2023 19:21

Babies don't need constant entertainment.

Mine is 6 months and his play time at home is between practicing sitting up on the floor with cushions with toys, having a bounce in the jumperoo, tummy time to practice crawling and gasps watching cocomelon.

I play with him occasionally but not constantly.

MaverickSnoopy · 20/06/2023 19:21

It's actually really important for babies to have time to develop their independence. At that age we used to do things together, but I'd also have little areas set up for them that they could explore on their own (with me present, just not right next to them).

LittleMousewithcloggson · 20/06/2023 19:28

Mine watched cartoons from that age -
loved the colours!
Also watched football and other sports
It never did her any harm
She used to spend time on her front and back on her play mat by herself (adult in room) usually bashing the hanging toys with her hands or trying to eat her feet
Good for them to spend time by themselves

Fandabedodgy · 20/06/2023 19:32

It's perfectly fine for a content baby to be in a bouncy chair. play mat, playpen etc whilst you chill, watch tv, catch up on your phone or get things done.

The world will also keep turning if baby catches sight of a tv program.

The cloth etc is totally unnecessary and a bit weird.

headcheffer · 20/06/2023 19:47

mindutopia · 20/06/2023 19:05

Honestly, I'm not sure I really 'played with' mine at all at 4 months. If not sleeping or eating or in the car or being held, they sat in the bouncer watching me load the dishwasher.

This. Enjoy your downtime OP Grin

Wittow · 20/06/2023 20:27

I'm more perturbed by you calling your baby they. Is it non binary already?

caringcarer · 20/06/2023 20:59

My DD used to like sitting in her bouncy chair watching the washing machine at that age. I'd be working in the kitchen and she didn't like being left in the lounge alone so I took her into the kitchen with me and she was very happy watching coloured washing going around.

caringcarer · 20/06/2023 20:59

I did talk to my babies a lot though.

IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads · 20/06/2023 21:39

Baby DS and I watched a lot of Homes Under the Hammer. 3 years later baby DD saw the repeats.

user1472831787898898865 · 20/06/2023 21:49

I purposely tried to leave my baby to entertain herself independently from early on (it didn't work very well as she would constantly shout for attention). If your four month old is happy to just chill, then let them be!
Mine didn't really start playing independently until eight months, and being able to have fifteen minutes to sit back with just an eye on her felt amazing.

Curtains70 · 20/06/2023 21:59

God, I used to sit and cuddle mine in bed and watch Breaking Bad 🤣

Aquamarine1029 · 20/06/2023 22:06

Pop the baby in a bouncer and put one of those bird videos on the telly on YouTube where they have the camera watching a bird feeder. Either that or a fish video. The baby will love it and you'll get at least a few minutes of breathing room.

Back in the stone ages when my son was a baby, I had a VHS tape of an aquarium. He LOVED it and it worked a treat so I could get things done.

GoodChat · 20/06/2023 22:06

Wittow · 20/06/2023 20:27

I'm more perturbed by you calling your baby they. Is it non binary already?

She just wants to remain as anonymous as possible

shivawn · 20/06/2023 22:14

GoodChat · 20/06/2023 22:06

She just wants to remain as anonymous as possible

Show quote history

She's massively overthinking things if so. There's nothing outing about her posts other than the fact she has a 4 month old and a husband.

GoodChat · 20/06/2023 22:15

@shivawn no but as soon as she starts posting anything else people will start jumping on any small thing she changes to keep her anonymity

SchoolShenanigans · 20/06/2023 22:17

I watched an insane amount of TV when my babies were 4 months. At that age they barely play with a rattle let alone want constant stimulation. As long as baby gets cuddles, smiles and kisses and the odd game of peekaboo, I think it'll be absolutely fine.

Enjoy the adult programmes while you can, that'll change in a year's time!

JayJayj · 20/06/2023 22:23

You definitely can. Do you have a baby gym? Every morning from about 6 weeks I would lay my baby down on the gym to look at the toys hanging whilst I had a cup of tea and breakfast.
my LG is 8 months now and I still put her to play by herself while I have my morning cup of tea. I get to wake up ready for the rest of the day of playing and entertaining

EilonwyWithRedGoldHair · 20/06/2023 22:30

DS loved the cricket at that age, he was generally a happy baby, but if he had wound himself up, cricket would soothe him and calm him down again.

LadyJ2023 · 20/06/2023 22:37

Oh course they can play alone for short periods. We have 3 under 2 and they learnt to play early and no problems. Same for my 3 month niece she lays on her play mat, or in bouncer etc while mum does housework and keeps looking in. Best to have a little independent baby than a whinging one who always needs attention for entertainment I think