I’ve been with my DH for 8 years and married for almost 5. He’s a devout Christian man who has always supported me and our two young children.
Almost 3 years ago he started a new job and built a good friendship with a group of co-workers. One of these is a female. I don’t have an issue with it, as I also have male friends.
I feel over the years they have gotten close. They talk a while over the phone during working hours, sometimes text outside of work but rarely. They also regularly meet for lunch. I’ve never met her but I trust my husband and he’s never given me a reason to doubt him.
Recently, I became curious and saw messages on his phone between him and this woman. There were sexual innuendos disguised as “food”. This is the only message I saw where he responded back playfully to her innuendoes and I absolutely lost it.
I checked all their messages and lots seemed deleted. I checked his work laptop and there is mild flirting and again, sexual jokes/ innuendos. Calls lasting over an hour!!! He meets her for lunch and spends evenings catching with work. Their lunches have been lasting hours.
I went ape shit on him and he says I’m being extra and that she is just a friend who is also married and loves her husband. He explained that she is sexually open and likes to make rude jokes, which apparently he often dismisses. But the last joke seemed to interest him and he couldn’t argue it.
Is there more to this??? I don’t trust a word he is saying to me and I feel he has played down how close he is to this female. I’m absolutely broken hearted.