Aibu to be bloody annoyed with the school here?

[jmscp]

DD5 (who's in foundation) has just merrily come out with a revelation at bedtime (obviously when else!?😂) that she has something in her book bag to show us that she'd forgotten about.

Intrigued I went and investigated and have found about 25 berry seeds.

Went back up and me and DP quizzed her on where they where from. She said they are from the playground and she's been putting them in her mouth and or peeling them and collecting the seeds.

Obviously I don't know what sort of berries they are or if they are likely to be harmful but even regardless of that am I right to be bloody annoyed nobody has noticed her ;

1. Doing it in the first place or
2. Then placing all of the sodding seeds in her book-bag and asking her where she had gotten them from?

As not to drip feed she's under watch of SENCO for suspected ADHD as she's highly impulsive and lacks sense for danger, so tbh I thought they might of been a little bit more interested in keeping and eye on her!

She's been told not to eat wild berries etc by us before and all that jazz but as per the above she forgets and just follows the impulse.

So am I just being totally over the top or am I well within my rights to be really annoyed and telling them so on Monday?

TIA. 🫠

I’m a bIt surprised a school yard has wild berries growing in it.

Do you need to try and identify them in case they are poisonous ? Can she tell you what colour the actual berries are?

I wouldn’t be furious with school no. They cannot possibly watch her every second unless she is on 1:1 cover which would indicate very high risk/ need and as a flip side would severely restricted her ability to play freely.

I would however mention it urgently so they can clear the berries and know she might need reassessment

I assume she doesn't have a one to one LSA? Sencos are usually too busy to watch each child individually. By all means go in all guns blazing but you will be that parent and if your child is in reception, you still habe 6 years to go. I wouldn't piss the staff off just yet.

Really? In a class of 30 all coming back in at the same time, all with something to say about something that happened over break, loads asking for the toilet, or asking for water bottles, or crying because they are too hot, or upset because they didn’t get to play the game they wanted because so and so wanted to play another game, or upset because they didn’t get the toy they wanted, or telling on another child because they did something wrong, some have left a jumper outside so asking to go out and get it, etc etc etc At the same time you are trying to settle them on the carpet and start the next input or sort out snacks. You really think you can’t miss a child putting seeds in their book bag when so many of them are putting jumpers or pictures or sun cream or sun hats or sunglasses in their book bags?

YABU. She’s not literally under the watch of the SENDCO. Go and volunteer in a reception classroom for a day and tell me you would notice such things.

I just thought it was surprising that a child could put something in their tray, then their book bag, over a period of time and nobody sees ? Not even another child who goes and tells on them. Evidently I'm unreasonable but I was surprised , yes !

Schools are supposed to be free of plants with dangerous berries, so let them know and get them identified.

Do you have any pictures of the seeds or berries? Maybe we could help identify them. I'm wondering if they might be rosehips from how you describe them.

It's not realistic that children can have adult eyes on them at all times in school, just as at home. Children can pick things up in a moment.

I imagine it's pretty easy to hide seeds so wouldn't be worrying they're not keeping an eye on her.
I would just tell the school about it so they know to look out for it. Simple way to go about it

I'm not stupid - I know being under watch of the SENCO doesn't mean she's physically followed around & "watched" by the SENCO.

And to the the poster who said I should read with my child, we do every day. The seeds where in the small zipped up pocket where she keeps her suncream. Not the actual main compartment of bag.

Thanks for the helpful replies.

As a SENDCo myself, a lot of people (parents, as well as those in the school) don't seem to understand that this is a strategic leadership role and that the day to day management of the SEND provision is by other school staff, eg teachers/TAs etc. Your child is not literally under the watch of the SENDCo and that is not what is outlined in the SEND Code of Practice. I think it would be OTT to go in guns blazing on this. Letting the school know would be a good idea so they can provide closer monitoring of this and adjust provision. Please work with the school rather than seeing them as having a battle with - it is much easier to find solutions and work in unison with that method. I hope your daughter is okay.

If you’re able to ‘lol’ at this, no you don’t go marching in to the school.

... just a thought - could they be from a break time fruit? DCs school gave free fruit at break time - could your DC have had cherries or something a few days running? So not actually picked at school but given at school?

I'd probably expect them to notice in a preschool setting, but not in a school with higher ratios, unless they had a 1 to 1

There are currently five children in our primary pf 215 pupils who need 1:1 supervision to keep themselves/others safe. Not one of them comes with additional funding for this as they would have done a decade ago.

With the best will in the world, schools simply cannot supervise every child to the level needed with current funding and recruitment issues. By all means flag it up with the school but, unless you have previously warned them about this specific scenario, there is every likelihood that she will not have been watched to check she wasn’t collecting berries.

I would let the school know and ask your DD to show her teacher or another member of staff where they came from just to make sure they aren't poisonous.

I don't have ADHD but I remember my friends and I daring each other to eat rowan berries when we were about 6. We thought they were poisonous because they were red, so obviously we weren't the brightest bulbs on the Christmas tree to eat something we thought could kill us. Thank God it wasn't the berries from the yew trees in the school garden or we would have been in serious trouble.

It probably wouldn't hurt the school to mention in a school assembly that eating random berries, seeds, and mushrooms when you don't know exactly what they are is a bad idea.

@jmscp If they were in the zip section of her book bag, could she just have been gathering over a period of time?

Yes, you are being OTT.
However, tell the teacher/TA what she’ been doing, so they can check on her regularly. Show them the berries/seeds so they can locate the source.
Check her book bag and other possessions as soon as she’s collected. Check thoroughly. Reinforce safety ru,es with her continuously.
Has she got pockets in her uniform? Get rid of them, or sew them up so it’s easier to spot if she’s got something in her hands.
You only have to monitor one five year old. School staff are dealing with 30+.