Could I be autistic?

[HabitualCreature]

I have NC and shamelessly posting in AIBU for traffic and company.

Unfortunately, I am sick and can't sleep which has led to me thinking a lot about this. I believe I may be autistic.

Reasons why I think I could be autistic;

• I hate meeting new people, group gatherings and I'm generally an introvert. I get riddled with anxiety with the thought of having to meet new people.

• I am a creature of habit and I absolutely hate when my routine/plans change. I find it stressful and upsetting to go with the flow. I like plenty of notice before I have visitors to the house or before I make plans with anyone.

• I have a very strong sense of justice and find it hard to let things go when I feel like I or someone I love have been wronged.

• I am a very black and white person, no grey in the middle.

• I find it hard to empathise with others and I'm generally quite selfish and find compromise hard.

• I think I stim. I often catch myself rubbing my feet together or stretching my toes repeatedly. I also prefer to sleep with something in my hand e.g. a piece of tissue although I can sleep without.

• I am often quite blunt which can come across as rude and I find it hard sometimes to keep my opinions to myself if it's something I feel passionately about.

Reasons why I don't think I'm autistic;

• I can be quite impulsive and make 'quick decisions' about life choices.

• Although I hate socialising, most people I talk to believe that I am a very confident person (although I don't think I am, it's an act).

• I don't have any obsessions or get particularly fixated on something.

• Despite hating change and finding it upsetting, I'm actually very adaptable and good at problem solving.

• I can make eye contact with people when conversing although sometimes this makes me feel uncomfortable.

I'm just curious to know the opinions of others and I know that strangers on the Internet can't diagnose me.

I may consider getting assessed in the future but for now, it is not an option.

I have no idea but you sound exactly like me and I don’t have autism!
the way I see it, is if a diagnosis won’t change anything then what is the point in it?
my friends daughter has autism, she lives in a home, cannot talk, screams, head bangs all day. She is extremely low functioning, so obviously her diagnosis was absolutely needed.
but If it’s just a case of being a little more introverted and rigid or whatever, then really it’s no big deal either way.

I have most but not all of those traits and I also wondered if I was possibly autistic. I have deduced that I'm just an introvert (albeit a confident one) and that's ok!

Being around extroverts, people I don't know and generally people out with the small circle of friends I am comfortable with exhaust me. All these years of thinking I was the odd one out amongst my (extrovert) friends but really, I just wasn't around 'my people'. So I limit these and spend time with the ones that make me feel comfortable!

Agree with this. Autism presents on a spectrum and if you are autistic, you sound pretty low on the spectrum /pretty high functioning.
Introverted and extroverted traits are also present on a spectrum so it's possible that your personality is just high up the introversion scale. Traits like having strong sense of justice are associated with introversion (but plenty of extraverts have this too. So much comes down to the individual and their background as well as inherited traits.

If it's not causing you real problems in life I wouldn't bother seeking a diagnosis. Why label yourself?

Both of my children and I have autism. It doesn’t really sound like you’re autistic from your post. The lack of strong interests, sensory issues etc being big points. It sounds like you could maybe just have a bit of social anxiety and maybe mild OCD.

I just wanted to add, seeking a diagnosis in adulthood isn’t about ‘labelling yourself’. It’s about understanding yourself, why you’ve had struggles etc. It’s like getting an answer to a whole bunch of questions you’ve asked yourself throughout your life.

And even though the terms ‘low functioning’ and ‘high functioning’ are very common, they’re not very accurate. Yes, some people have more impairments than others and will need more help. But just because someone seems like they’re coping fine, seem ‘high functioning’, on the outside - doesn’t mean they aren’t massively struggling to keep control.

You sound pretty average in terms of what you've described. To a degree, no one loves change and most people would prefer to keep things on their own terms if possible.

Humm, I'd suggest you don't know much about autism as many of the things on your 'why I don't list' are manifestations of autism. You also only list negative things.

The best advice I was ever given was, 'Implement tools and mechanisms design to support people with autism. Either they won't change your life and you will forget about doing them, or they will transform your life and it will be better. You still might not be autistic but who cares, your life either stays the same or gets better. There is no downside'

Were you late talking, potty training?
Did have a good friend in early childhood?
Did you ever get upset on shopping trips or at other peoples houses and have to go home?
What did you eat as a child?
Did you sleep well as a child?

Have a look at the diagnostic criteria and see if you think you fit. Traits have little bearing when it comes to diagnosis.

My autistic child makes eye contact.

Autism is a developmental disorder, so your early development will be telling.

I'm autistic (diagnosed in my twenties).

I have to say that nothing on your list makes me think that you have autism. You mainly say you dislike change, prefer things done your way and are quite selfish and opinionated - I think that applies to most people to be honest

What I'm trying to say that is there's a big difference between liking things to be done a certain way and needing things to be done a certain way in order to prevent sensory overload or a meltdown.

I like a lot of things to be down a certain way because I'm quite fussy, but there are also things I need to do in a certain way or I get distressed - sometimes to the point or tears if I'm experiencing extreme overload. I can mask for a short period in social situations but not on any kind of long-term basis.

You don't describe any kind of extreme stress or reaction to anything you dislike - you just say you don't like it and prefer other things.

Have a look at the AQ10 - you can Google it. It’s not a diagnosis in itself but it’s a good start to see if it’s worth exploring.

Brilliant post.

Succinct easy to use advice. Could also be applied to any other condition.