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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Would you judge me for this? Be honest please!

370 replies

Biggestandbrighteststar · 16/06/2023 22:36

Hi! Just looking for some honest opinions on whether I’m acting weirdly and if you would judge me for this!

I’ve had family dogs before as a child, but im in my early 20s and my dog is my first dog that’s actually been mine IYSWIM. I’m a bit of an obsessed dog mum who spends the majority of my time with my dog and making sure she’s ok. But I’m getting better haha.

anyway, my dog is a large breed double coated dog who really, really struggles with hot weather. We can usually get away with walking very early and very late but with the heatwave recently they have been miserable even with that and even walking at 6am has been too hot for them.

however, I’ve found a good window between 2-4 where it’s perfectly cool enough for them. So we have been going to bed at 10, then walking from 2-4, then going back to bed and sleeping until the morning. I can be extremely flexible with my work (I don’t work 9-5 for example) and I’m feeling fine with the routine. I’m still getting enough sleep I’ve just rejigged my day to accommodate it all and it works.

I don’t particularly like being out in the middle of the night but my dog absolutely adores it so I take a torch, charged phone etc. During the day she gets to plod around the house and chill in her pool but it means she also gets exercise too.

i briefly mentioned it to some friends who snorted, rolled their eyes and said I’m being ridiculous walking about during the night and that it’s unsafe and I’m being selfish disrupting my dogs sleep. But she was so depressed not being able to be walked and this solution works for us both. But I don’t know if me being an obsessed slightly neurotic first time dog mum is clouding my judgement and I’m being silly? Just to clarify I wouldn’t judge others for not doing this, it’s just something that works well for me and my dog

OP posts:
Beargrumps22 · 16/06/2023 22:37

Being kind sensible and responsible

Bananaspliff · 16/06/2023 22:38

Don’t see a problem if it works for you and your dog.
I’d only judge you if your dog shit outside my house and you didn’t clear it up.

CrystalCoco · 16/06/2023 22:38

I think you're being a good pet mom and doing what you think is the best for your pooch, who cares what others think and if they don't understand then so be it. As long as you feel safe walking at that time then I wouldn't stop.

tweener · 16/06/2023 22:39

I'd think you were being silly. Why can't the dog have a walk at 8/9pm when it's cooler? Why the middle of the night?

murasaki · 16/06/2023 22:39

If it works for you, the dog, and your.job, then go for it.

RuffledKestrel · 16/06/2023 22:39

Totally bonkers! But if I was in your position with such flexible work then I'd probably do the same 😅
If it works, it works. So long as neither of you are suffering a lack of sleep from it then it's not a problem surely.

Biggestandbrighteststar · 16/06/2023 22:40

tweener · 16/06/2023 22:39

I'd think you were being silly. Why can't the dog have a walk at 8/9pm when it's cooler? Why the middle of the night?

Because it’s still above 20 degrees at that time and she cannot cope with it at all. It was 23 degrees at 11 the other night and 16 at 2

OP posts:
continentallentil · 16/06/2023 22:40

It’s perfectly reasonable if it works for you both

whst isn’t is using the phrase Dog Mum..

Biggestandbrighteststar · 16/06/2023 22:41

Bananaspliff · 16/06/2023 22:38

Don’t see a problem if it works for you and your dog.
I’d only judge you if your dog shit outside my house and you didn’t clear it up.

Haha good point, I always pick it up thankfully!

OP posts:
AtrociousCircumstance · 16/06/2023 22:41

They just don’t get it, that’s all. You’ve made an assessment of the situation and found a solution that works for you and your dog. It doesn’t matter what others think.

Dogs are the best ❤️

LaurieFairyCake · 16/06/2023 22:41

I'd shave her coat (not completely as half an inch affords protection from sun) and take her out 9-11pm

Basically to get home before pubs shut.

tulippa · 16/06/2023 22:41

Could you get its coat cut so it feels cooler? And then walk in the evening. I know nothing about dogs so don't know if there are some breeds that have to keep their fur long.

LaurieFairyCake · 16/06/2023 22:41

You're an AMAZING dog mum btw FlowersGrin

Lastqueenofscotland2 · 16/06/2023 22:42

No. I judge the people I see dragging their dogs to beer gardens in the middle of the day. You’re doing the right thing

Biggestandbrighteststar · 16/06/2023 22:42

continentallentil · 16/06/2023 22:40

It’s perfectly reasonable if it works for you both

whst isn’t is using the phrase Dog Mum..

It’s just a tongue in cheek phase, and I bloody well feel like it sometimes haha she’s hard work at times (but that’s why I love her so much I suppose ! 😊❤️)

OP posts:
Tulipvase · 16/06/2023 22:42

Whilst I wouldn’t judge you, I wonder if it’s necessary. I get up at 0630 and the temp hasn’t been more than 14 degrees any day this week at that time. It’s been 28 degrees in the day so has been hot.

Bayleaf25 · 16/06/2023 22:42

Literally fine if it works for you (as long as dog isn’t barking outside in the middle of the night I don’t really care).

tweener · 16/06/2023 22:43

Biggestandbrighteststar · 16/06/2023 22:40

Because it’s still above 20 degrees at that time and she cannot cope with it at all. It was 23 degrees at 11 the other night and 16 at 2

23 degrees is fine for almost all dogs, potentially not flat faced breeds but if it's a walk and not vigorous exercise it's fine.

Zhougzhoug · 16/06/2023 22:43

5-7am would be safer as there will be early risers about, but still cool

Biggestandbrighteststar · 16/06/2023 22:43

Good point RE cutting her hair. Unfortunately She has already been trimmed as much as she can safely but can’t be shorter as she is risking sunburn with it x

OP posts:
Ponoka7 · 16/06/2023 22:44

I had a rescue GS who did have issues. I could only run him off a lead in the middle of the night, so that's what we did. I used to deliberately go out so I saw the sun rise, I got really in touch with the changing seasons, they were lovely times.

Biggestandbrighteststar · 16/06/2023 22:45

tweener · 16/06/2023 22:43

23 degrees is fine for almost all dogs, potentially not flat faced breeds but if it's a walk and not vigorous exercise it's fine.

Maybe so but she is visibly uncomfortable with it, I wouldn’t take a large double coated dog out above 20 tbh anyway but she is particularly sensitive to the heat and wouldn’t be able to cope with that

OP posts:
OneTC · 16/06/2023 22:45

I once had a incredibly dog aggressive staffy rescue that only ever really went outside at 2am for about the first year we had her. It's funny because there's quite a few people out 2am with their antisocial dogs

itsmylife7 · 16/06/2023 22:45

Honestly I'd think you're crazy for doing it 😀
( says the person who used to heat her cats food in the microwave as he preferred it that way )

MonumentalLentil · 16/06/2023 22:45

I think it's a good idea, however I do think calling your dog 'they' and 'them is weird'. It's bad enough trying to work out if someone is referring to one person or several these days without it being applied to dogs too.

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