Noise from child upstairs...

[Otins]

I live in a flat. It's more of a maisonette really, with just me downstairs and 1 more flat upstairs.

Upstairs are very reasonable people. We get on OK. They were tenants but are now buying it.

The sound proofing isn't great. I am totally fine with hearing them in the background..soft footsteps, their toilet flushing, their washing machine on, their front door slamming etc etc.

The issue is their 4 year old who sounds like an elephant when they run up and down their hall.

We've had issues in the past with creaky floorboards which were fixed at my request (as they woke me up every night at midnight when the parents walked over them when they went to bed, as they clanged against the heating pipes) and they mentioned that they had previously lived in a ground floor flat and had issues with noises from upstairs)

It was all very reasonably discussed, as it was the fabric of the building that was at fault, not a person as such.

So my question is, if I am supposed to suck up the noise as I am a ground floor occupier and this is what living on a ground floor brings (which I do for all the other noise), should first floor occupants also be a bit more aware of noise they produce that affects downstairs? It surely isn't all 100% down to the ground floor to be inconvenienced.

The kid doesn't do it that early (although it was 6.15am this morning and my alarm doesn't go off til 7) and it isn't late as she is in bed. (Late I just hear normal adult footsteps above my bedroom, the occasional TV and v low level conversation)

(I grew up in a detached house so don't know if "stop that running up and down you'll disturb the neighbours" is reasonable for me to expect the parents to say to their child)

Or do the parents know. They just a) don't care or b) think that the noise I experience is just part of living in a flat.

If they don't know, would I be a shit to make them aware? Would this then restrict what they do to an unreasonable degree/make them uncomfortable in their own home....as the kid is just being a 4 year old.

It sounds like a 4 year old being a 4 year old and just moving around their home.

You can mention it to them and ask if they would mind carpeting everything. But you can't stop noisy footsteps or reasonable noise which a child moving around their flat is.
Escalate this too much and it could get nasty. The issue is the building not the people in it. The council won't do anything because moving around your building is reasonable noise, this isn't people partying or blasting music.

So you haven't even made them aware of the problem? They're supposed to guess and then solve the problem without any communication?

Have a rational and reasonable conversation with them, point out uts only in the hallway and discuss what the solution could be? As a pp suggested, a carpet?

Yes, it is just the 4 year old being a 4 year old, but would a bit of consideration om their part to ask their child to walk not run around be unreasonable to expect? I seem to be the only one making allowance for urban living in a flat, not them.

The place is already carpeted (although very thinly) apart from their kitchen. When the kid is in the kitchen it sounds like she has a hammer on the floor, but that is far enough away from my bedroom/lounge it doesn't disturb me as such, as i don't 'relax' in my kitchen.

"Whenwillitallmakesense · Today 17:47
So you haven't even made them aware of the problem? They're supposed to guess and then solve the problem without any communication? "

Not yet. I'm guaging opinion on whether or not it is reasonable to. Their kid isn't doing anything wrong. It isn't late at night....(but it is bloody irritating during the day!)

I don't want to rock the boat of a generally good relationship with them, if it is generally seen as unreasonable to mention this to them and make the feel uncomfortable in their own home.

But you mentioned the creaking floorboards and managed to resolve that amicably. A thicker carpet may be all that is needed. It's not unreasonable to try resolve something that's impacting your sleep or daily routine.

We had this although child was only about 2 when they moved. We were the downstairs of a 2 floor block with them above.
We just accepted that the noise of them running around was part of living in flats. We did complain about the very loud playing of bob the builder (think we could hear every word level) at 6am in their bedroom (immediately above ours). Let it go the first couple of times but then complained and it didn't happen again. But I would consider running around normal noise unless it was pre 7am or post 8/9pm. So maybe I would ask your neighbours to keep him/her a bit quieter first thing but other than that I think you just have to deal with it.
We now live in a 1st floor flat with a 1 year old- thankfully sound proofing is pretty good in these flats and we have very understanding downstairs neighbours!

I agree with a PP that it sounds like a building problem rather than a badly behaved 4yo problem. He will hopefully grow out of his heavy footedness in time.
The fix from their side would be a high quality soundproofing underlay. They could also fit a soundproof layer between the joists and floorboards. I can't see them agreeing to either of these however, as it will be a lot of expense and disruption for no gain (to them). You could add soundproofing to your ceilings? Not cheap though!

It’s fine to ask them to stop the 4 year old running before 7 in the week, and, if possible 8 at weekends. As long as you accept there will be times they can’t stop him.

You could also suggest a runner rug with a rubber mat underneath it? I’d offer x amount of cash for that. Have a Google to double check it will help though.

I would talk to your upstairs neighbours and ask one of them to come down to your flat to listen to what it sounds like when the other adult and the four year old walk across their kitchen floor. You can then decide if it is a building problem or a four year old problem.

I sympathize as flat construction can be crap. One of my friends got horrible complaints from her downstairs neighbour about her DC's noise, but they were just walking across the room in an ordinary way. The flats had no sound insulation and a pet dog would sound like an elephant to the people below. At least you sound reasonable, my friend's neighbour seemed to want the children to levitate everywhere.

If it's already carpeted then I'm not sure what they could do? If it's specifically the hall way you could maybe ask them to fit some thicker rugs or some decent underlay?

I could ask my ds not to run until I was blue in the face but he only has one speed - especially when he is excited to come in for a hug first thing.

Could you try white noise or ear plugs to help you sleep a bit deeper?