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Original poster

To not know how to feel about this information?

64 replies

tertrisnblox · 15/06/2023 21:09

I am a criminal justice social worker and have had a student with me for the past six weeks (I am her link worker). She's been great, passed with flying colours, went above and beyond, was really empathetic and this really stood out. She was able to communicate and build strong relationships with the clients in such a short period of time. I have no doubt she will make a fantastic social worker.

Wednesday was her last day, and we had our final supervision. Said our goodbyes etc. At the end student said to me, something along these lines (can't remember exactly), 'I never shared this with you in the beginning as I was worried about being judged, but eleven years ago I actually went through the criminal justice system and have four convictions, I've also had my own addiction issues, it's been such an honour being on this side of things and able to help others'.

I just said some pleasantries, nodded and smiled and told her well done again.

I know that she will have been PVG checked through both the uni and my employers before starting her so I have no doubt they have deemed her suitable. However, I feel slightly duped and unsure how to feel. To come out with this on the last day? Kind of feels like she's been keeping some big secret.

Am I being precious? I just feel uncomfortable about it and don't feel it's something I can speak to my colleagues regarding.

Should I approach my team leader?

OP posts:
RebulahConundrum · 15/06/2023 21:11

She probably didn't tell anyone because she didn't want anyone to judge her. As you are now. She's clearly been through a hard time and is trying to better herself and others. She should be commended for that.

KrisAkabusi · 15/06/2023 21:12

She hasn't done anything wrong. As you say she will have been checked before placement. I think she was right, you would have judged her. Be grateful she trusted you enough in the end to tell you the truth.

cansu · 15/06/2023 21:12

Fgs. Should she have to go over her past with everyone she meets. Many people will judge her. She has the right to get on with her life. It is not about you. She did a good job. She thanked you.

GottaGirlcrush · 15/06/2023 21:13

It's life

No need to go to 'managers'

YouveGotAFastCar · 15/06/2023 21:15

However, I feel slightly duped

I'd consider why. She's been adequately checked and judged competent, and she didn't need to share her past with you - she did so because she trusted you, and she wanted to share her experience. They may well have contributed to her being the great social worker that you've said she is.

I'd also have expected that yours is a career that knows more than most that lives are not linear...

Alittlesummeroasis · 15/06/2023 21:15

You’re being ridiculous. Her own journey is probably what fuels her empathy and desire to support others. You thought she was good at the job, don’t let that view be swayed by events in her youth. Are you sure you have the right frame of mind for the job?

SnapPop · 15/06/2023 21:15

She wanted to avoid being judged. I don't blame her.

Princessconsuelabananahammock9 · 15/06/2023 21:15

I don't understand why she should have told you sooner?

phoenixrosehere · 15/06/2023 21:15

'I never shared this with you in the beginning as I was worried about being judged, but eleven years ago I actually went through the criminal justice system and have four convictions, I've also had my own addiction issues, it's been such an honour being on this side of things and able to help others'.

Considering your discomfort, it sounds like she was right in her assumption that you would judge her and instead of thinking how amazing she has been and how she has turned her life around and will be able to help and connect with people, you instead feel duped.

Be honest with yourself, if she had told you these things beforehand, would you have given her a fair shot or would it be something you couldn’t get pass and would have you waiting for her to fail or do something wrong?

Waitingforsunshine · 15/06/2023 21:15

OP, your reaction tells us that she made the right call. It seems as you wouldn't have given her a fair chance otherwise, most likely.

Pickledpegg · 15/06/2023 21:17

Jesus christ

Your post here is exactly why she didn’t tell you

Jelly0naplate · 15/06/2023 21:17

Is she not allowed to turn her life around come back from mistakes she made when younger?

She feared you'd judge once you knew about her past. And you did judge her. Let's hope she didn't walk out of that room feeling judged.

GottaGirlcrush · 15/06/2023 21:18

Criminal justice actively recruits people with lived life experiences and vets accordingly

It's a non issue

Juiceboxxy · 15/06/2023 21:19

Pickledpegg · 15/06/2023 21:17

Jesus christ

Your post here is exactly why she didn’t tell you

And probably the reason people reoffend. Whats the point in turning your life around if people never let you move past it.

You need to sit down and have a long hard look at yourself. If you don't believe people can change any are you even doing this job?

WiddlinDiddlin · 15/06/2023 21:19

Looking at your reaction to this... do you not think she was absolutely spot on, if she HAD told you, you WOULD have treated her differently.

WiddlinDiddlin · 15/06/2023 21:19

Hit post too soon...

Perhaps in part your discomfort is in realising that she was right!

2lsinllama · 15/06/2023 21:20

What would you say to your team leader?

ghostyslovesheets · 15/06/2023 21:20

really empathetic and this really stood out. She was able to communicate and build strong relationships

maybe take a leaf out of her book - an as a social worker you should KNOW not to 'talk to your colleagues' about her - and what on earth would you tell your line manager

She would not be in the job/on the course if there where concerns

I work within Children's Services - 10+ years ago all 3 of my children where on CP plans - not only did it not impact on my ability to do my job - it made me better at it, less judgemental and more compassionate.

GottaGirlcrush · 15/06/2023 21:20

Maybe she should have your job op...

Ponoka7 · 15/06/2023 21:20

I think that you are duty bound to share the disclosure. It's more than likely that the convictions can be disregarded because they were over ten years ago. As you know, you can never assume that someone else has been told. I find on here the codes of conduct/responsibility etc within SW isn't understood. You are questioning, so do it. When I was doing my BA in SW we had people half way through placements suddenly being told that they couldn't continue.

neslop · 15/06/2023 21:20

Seriously? I honestly can't see why you would feel like this?

hattyhathat · 15/06/2023 21:20

So you've judged her...

Lamelie · 15/06/2023 21:20

Be flattered that she told you but also reflect on how your good opinion of her would never had been formed because you would have judged her before, as you have judged her now.
It would be an issue if she wasn’t dbs’ed. Certainly don’t pass on the information to anyone.

Puzzledanddissatisfied · 15/06/2023 21:21

I hate to break it to you OP, but you’re not automatically entitled to know everything about everyone you meet. And thinking you are - and that anyone who doesn’t tell you everything has duped you - is really quite odd.

Is it that you’re now worried you’ve said something you ought not to have done about your clients?

LifeIsPainHighness · 15/06/2023 21:21

That’s very small minded of you OP. It will probably make her an excellent social worker. I actually think more people with loved experiences should be in these jobs!