School withholding food as punishment

[catgirl1976]

DS is due to start high school in September.

I’ve just seen a highly alarming thread about the school in a local Facebook group.

Massive disclaimer : Obviously people can write any sort of garbage on social media and it may well not be true and I will of course be speaking to the school at the earliest opportunity to gain clarity before taking any action but enough people have confirmed the allegations to make me a bit worried.

The issues raised are

1. Toilets are now pretty much all gender neutral. I can deal with that - I know enough about the law to be confident I. Challenging and ensuring sufficient single sex provision is in place so whilst I’ll be challenging if true I’m confident in my ability to do that.
2. Kids are getting a detention for being one minute late. I can live with that. Late is late. Important lesson.
3. Classrooms are 29 degrees (new building has thermometers in each classroom) and kids cannot have water during class or in the playground at breaks. Seems a bit mad. Willing to listen to the rationale and alternative arrangements if this is true.
4. This is the big one for me…kids are routinely being denied lunch as a punishment for bad behaviour. I am totally fine with appropriate sanctions for bad behaviour. E.g. mess about in the lunch queue eat lunch in isolation or miss break. But actually not he allowed to have lunch? To be denied food? Surely that’s illegal? I would have thought this was nonsense but at least 10 people have commented that their child has been denied lunch. No other arrangements or food just no food. So breakfast at home and nothing to eat all day. Surely this cannot be legal?

as said before I’ll check with the school about the truth of this and points one to three I can deal with but if point four is true and good is being withheld as a punishment…what would you do? There’s a transition evening coming up where I will have chance to ask questions and I’m gong to email the school asking for their response to these comments but surely a school can’t deny a child the opportunity it y to eat as a punishment?

Even googling I can’t find any incidences of this. It seems barbaric. AIBU or is this a thing?

Children say all kinds of things to their parents and many believe them.

I had a student P who was tapping his ruler while waiting for the lesson to start. I asked him to stop. Then two more boys came in, one had his arm around the other's shoulder. P shouted out a homophobic slur. I went apeshit, took him out, bollocked him, etc. His mum phoned me that afternoon asking why I sent her son out for tapping his ruler!!!

Ask your child. If they can't give you a clear answer then email the head teacher or HOY and say share the list of allegations from other parents. Ask them for their responses on each point, then you'll know.

My friend recently went to work in a local school. A few weeks later I saw a whole bunch of parents ranting over Facebook about the school. Some of the stuff being posted was outrageous. I messaged my friend who was laughing her head off and the truth was very different from the versions being posted over social media.

There seems to be an epidemic of parents who believe everything their little darlings tell them and are completely blind to their poor behaviour.

Can’t you ring the school and ask to speak to the safeguard and also the head or deputy head and just ask out right what’s their policy on this and clarify if what you have read is true?? X

Ring the school about what you presume to be malicious lies. Someone could be spreading them because of a disagreement about the way their child has been treated, or with some other axe to grind (think things such as the thread about parking on a local resident's drive).

I'm sure you'll get a response.

I very much doubt that denying lunch as a punishment is true. I also doubt it's true that kids can't have water at breaktimes.

Classroom 29 degrees - pretty much standard. Why don't you offer to fundraise for air con? The teachers would love you forever.

even at primary school they have a water bottle accessible at all times. Surely that’s a basic need

I’ll stick my hand up as a teacher and say….if I keep a child back at break or lunch, I would always give sufficient time for them to go to the loo and get something to eat. In other words, I wouldn’t keep them the whole of lunch or break, but they wouldn’t get the pick of the food.

Water bottles are a pain. A real pain. In and out of bags, spilling on tables, crackling of single-use plastic, breathing in and out of the bottle, demands to be allowed to fill it up (2 minutes after break/lunch), demands to go to the loo ‘cos they’ve refilled 15 times since 9am and it’s now 11:15 (and I’m really not exaggerating). No, it’s in your bag and it stays there. You don’t need to be drinking constantly.

Im surprised every day so many of us over the age of 30 didnt die of thirst as children.

Please come back and tell us exactly what the school said in response you your detailed questions.
Save the email, so you have it on record as a reference for later.
I’m pleased you’re not relying solely on parents and children as a source of accurate information.

And what did they parents saying they did about it? There is not a chance in hell I'd let that go unchallenged if it was mine!

Same for the water.

I wonder how many parents find their children suckling on water bottles all day long at home? Or does access to water when they need it mean their child drinks a reasonable amount, rather than constantly?

*say

Food and water being DENIED??

No fucking way. That's just cruelty.

This

I’d be rethinking my options if I were you OP.

I'm almost 40 and was allowed a drink at break, it was usually a small carton of milk.

My primary school's water fountains didn't work, and occasionally we didn't get water at lunch either because it was coming through the taps brown. Nobody brought in their own drinks with their packed lunch (I don't remember whether it was disallowed, or whether people just didn't). I remember being thirsty and getting headaches quite frequently. Sometimes it stung when I peed. None of us died, but it wasn't pleasant and I doubt it helped learning.

Or utter bullshit

So these desperately worried parents of course went to the governors, ofsted? Oh no wait, they posted on the cesspit that is your average fb group.

And I would lay money on the fact that the ten parents who all claim this happened to their child too all know each other, and their little darlings are the thugs that hang about outside the local shops and intimidate the locals after school.

Or stop believing fb nonsense

This is NOT OK.

I do not withold food from my children and I do NOT expect anyone else to either. If this is happening it is abusive.

I am shocked you would be OK with this for your children.

Yes. But it was constantly sucking on a litre of water all day long.

Quite. Often known as "site for shite".

Utter nonsense. And I'm not sure why you included punishments in your list that you actually agree with.

That's so kids lying to parents so they don't know what they actually did at school...

I would be surprised at the no drinks on the yard at break thing as every school I have worked in has allowed drinks at break apart from energy drinks, our local one has a coffee hut...

The lunch time detention and not allowed to get food if you have not brought lunch from home has happened to my daughter though. Ironically the detention she got and missed lunch for was because she did not come to the detention the lunchtime before which was class detention as punishment for bad behaviour on a day she was at the dentist and was not in class when the behaviour happened.
Not sure what lesson that taught her.