Medical abortions *TW*

[Badabingbadaboomm]

Trying to think of a way to word this but AIBU to think medical abortions aren’t really understood for what they are?

Recent news sparked a conversation between a group of us about abortions and I realised that a few of the people I was chatting to thought that taking pills for a medical abortion was a fairly simple quick thing with one woman saying “it’s just like a heavy period isn’t it?”

I have had 2 medical abortions, one as recent as December and even though mentally I have no trauma from it like regret or guilt, the actual process was horrendous. It lasted 10 hours for me each time of the most excruciating pain I’ve ever felt, the blood loss was far more than “a heavy period”, the pain made me pass out more than once and I was vomiting from the pain too. I couldn’t do anything other than writhe in pain once the contractions started.

I understand some women may have had a easier time but it does make me question how many people thing “you can take pills at home” means that abortions aren’t physically challenging.

Yes, I used to perform these for women over from weeks 4 up to 19w6d and it could be pretty traumatic.

I think the thought of taking pills and the reality of what happens are very different, and the reality isn't something most people are exposed to.

Sorry you had such a difficult time x

Agree.
So much blood - more than I've experienced after the birth of my children. And excruciating pain that was like a cross between period pain and labour, but without any of the drugs to take it away.
I think I also had retained products as I had excruciating pain for several days afterwards and then passed something. This was a long time ago but in those days you had to go in to hospital until you'd "passed". No-one checked me or scanned me afterwards, just said you can go now. Don't think I even had a follow up appointment. No advice of what to do with heavy bleeding. No compassion at all - just nasty, dismissive nurses.
I won't go into detail of how I became pregnant but it was not me just being a silly girl, it was quite traumatising.

I had a twin miscarriage (stopped developing after 7 weeks) and had to take the medical abortion pills as my body wasn’t processing itself.

Completely agree with you - I was vomiting and in pain for hours. I have recently had my son and can honestly say the pain from the medical pills was worse than half of my active labour. Most certainly nothing like a heavy period!

I am an MTOP practitioner & it astounds me daily how many of my patients think its an "easy, quick, simple" process.

We’ve moved so far in terms of childbirth being a taboo subject - so many women and young girls in the past who had no idea what was coming but now there is a wealth of knowledge available.

I realise we’re still fighting for abortion rights across the world but in the UK at least we should be talking about it.

The BPAS consultant told me over the phone to get paracetamol. It did nothing. The second time they said they could prescribe me codeine and sent me 28 pills. I used all of the ones I could in the time period and it still didnt even touch the pain.

Between vomiting, sitting on the toilet to pass blood and tissue, looking to see if you have passed the foetus, wanting to lay back down, all while in this horrendous pain - I found It so disorientating

It was just like a heavy period for me but I was only about 9 weeks. However I did see the foetus and that wasn't explained to me. I had no idea what the pills would do until I got the leaflet on the day. I did do some reading beforehand but they explain it properly at the hospital. I also regret it and didn't receive anything to try to counsel me around that beforehand, but if I had it would have made me angry as I was adamant, but ultimately I wish I hadn't done it.

I have twice used the medical abortion pills to medically manage miscarriages.

The first time was not much more than a heavy period with cramps and was over and done in a day.

The second one I was in so much pain I called the suppliers of the pills for advice, was crawling around on the floor in pain, and while initially over within about 6 hours of excruciating pain, actually tailed on for two weeks with intermittent cramps and a fist-sized clot passed two weeks after taking the pills.

People react differently and can react differently each time.

I was quite dismayed on another thread that posters thought that the abortion pills poisoned a foetus instead of what actually happens.... inducing a very intense labour.

And yes, you're quite right that more info should be shared with women about what to expect.

It is definitely not like a heavy period!

I had pain in my cervix, I passed massive clots, and the bleeding flowed. And it lasted about 7 weeks! Plus I was extremely emotionally distressed by the whole thing, so the sight of the heavy blood and clots was just a constant reminder of what I did. You pass the sac when you have a medical abortion too, so how can it possibly be like a heavy period? It’s that and more!

I did a 5 minute walk to the supermarket and soaked through a whole pad and leaked by the time I reached supermarket. It was horrific. A heavy period is not that heavy, and I have had some heavy periods in my time.

Before I had a medical abortion, I was guilty of this misconception that it’s just like a heavy period. How stupid and wrong I was.

I haven't had an abortion but I had a missed miscarriage at 12 weeks so I had to take the same pills.
What I was shocked about was that I was having continuous contractions, which obviously makes sense but I'd never even thought about it. I was in pain for hours and hours and the bleeding during and after was horrendous. Definitely not like a heavy period.

I agree - I also do wish they had more support after the abortion and after my miscarriages - I had no aftercare with either. Just left too it. But I'm finding womens health care very limited and woefully lacking in any suppot or guidance- (currently suffering with peri symptoms) its a very much get on with it attitude with the hc professionals I have met.

I didn't want an abortion either had one due to my financial circumstances - dont think I'll ever be the same person again and do wish more support was given during the process - I found it all quite distressing.

I'm so sorry for the experiences you have all posted about here. I'll just post my experience here in the interest of balance. As someone that suffers with very heavy and very painful periods i found my MA to be manageable. It was cramping for 3 hours and passing clots but it was managed alongside codeine. I found the mental build-up to the process the worst part by miles. I was petrified to go ahead as I was worried the pain would be worse than what I go through every month, but it was on par if not a bit better. So much so that even when I was in some pain I was just happy that the ball was rolling and that it would be over soon.
I'm not writing to discredit anyones experience, as I believe MA and women's pain relief and mental health needs to be taken a lot more seriously by medical professionals. It currently just isn't good enough. But just in case someone is reading this and panicking like I was a few days ago, you will be okay.