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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Nursery v childminder?

1 reply

Blev2022 · 13/06/2023 12:18

Posting here for traffic, apologies!

I just want some experiences people have had with settling their little ones in nursery

I've started sending my son to my daughter's nursery for 2 x 5 hour sessions a week (this is the plan anyway!). He's onto settling session number 5 - he had two with me there and the last three he was dropped at the door. He has had to be picked up early from the previous one due to distress, today I picked him and he had been crying most of the morning and they had to bring my daughter down into his room to settle him. He has been saying I don't like nursery for the rest of the morning.

He's generally a bit anxious around busy crowded places with lots of children - last week he was invited to a party with his sister and he had to be outside in the car for the full two hours with dad because he was crying that he wanted to leave.

Should I consider childminders? Will the settling at nursery get easier and this is just normal? For context, this nursery is 140 a week for those two sessions and with the current COL crisis I can't afford more than two half days.

YABU - you're too soft, he will settle he just needs more time
YANBU - nursery may not be the best fit, try a childminder.

OP posts:
MindatWork · 13/06/2023 12:44

It's still very early days OP - how old is he? My daughter started when she was 1 and took ages to settle, despite being a v sociable child (this was pre-covid, she's now 4.5). She cried a lot at drop off, didn't eat the food, struggled to nap etc - we had no choice though as we both had to work and there weren't any local childminders. It took around a month for her to settle completely with no tears at drop off, but bear in mind this was only 8 days in total as she only did two full days a week.

2 x 5 hours sessions isn't a lot of time for him to get into the swing of things; are they on consecutive days?

If you have a good local childminder with availability you may find he settles easier in a 'home from home' environment with fewer children.

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