AIBU for not replacing a broken wine glass on holiday?

[OtterlyMad]

My DH and I have just spent a week in a rural holiday cottage. We accidentally broke a wine glass while washing up on the last night of our trip, so we messaged the owner the next morning to let them know and apologise for the inconvenience.

After we checked out, we received a text from the owner complaining that it’s the norm to either replace breakages ourselves or leave a £5 note. Is everyone else aware of this “rule”?Because we weren’t! In fairness I don’t think we’ve ever broken anything in a holiday let before so no experience of this situation. Obviously if we’d damaged something big or stained a carpet or whatever then I would expect to reimburse them, but I suppose I assumed that breakages of small/cheap things like glassware, crockery etc. would be super common and therefore factored into the price. It’s also quite difficult to buy a singular wine glass. Would they not care about it matching the rest of their glassware? Or do you think they would expect a whole new set?

It got broken around 11pm and we had to check out before 10am the next morning, so frankly we wouldn’t have had time to buy a replacement even if we’d known that was the expectation. The rule wasn’t mentioned anywhere in the online listing or in the welcome pack. We also don’t tend to carry cash, so as above, couldn’t have left a £5 note even if we’d wanted to. Most irritating of all is that lots of the kitchen sets were already incomplete e.g. there were only 3 wine glasses to begin with (the property is advertised for 4 people). We didn’t mind as it was just the 2 of us, but it’s clear the owners don’t actually check and replace items that get lost/broken… makes me think we just shouldn’t have mentioned it. Too honest for our own good!

I feel guilty as we strive to be excellent guests, but I also think it’s a dumb rule and I’m annoyed that they’ve cast a shadow over our holiday for the sake of a £1.50 glass (especially as we paid over £500 for the cottage).

Did we act unreasonably?

YABU - the owner is right, and you should have carried change on you to leave in case of a breakage.
YANBU - the owner is being petty, a broken glass is normal wear and tear.

They would be a guest in your home in a similar way that the OP was a guest in the rental accommodation.

Perhaps a clumsy way to try to make an analogy but I think it's relevant. At least I'd expect the friend to offer to replace the glass.

The OP didn't offer, didn't actually replace what they broke.

Oh my word, no, of course I wouldn’t! Am curling up inside with horror at the very idea of expecting a friend to reimburse me for a broken glass!

OP - the host is being petty, and daft. Hope you otherwise had a lovely holiday.

I'd expect a friend to at the very very least to offer to replace the glass that they broke. Depending on what glass it was, it could be a cheap glass from Ikea or it could be a crystal glass from a set. It is not normal wear and tear.

it's good manners for the breaker to offer to replace the glass for her friend, and it's good manners for the friend to say 'don't be silly'.

I would never expect a friend to replace a glass they'd broken in my home.

If a friend was visiting you and they broke one of your wine glasses, would you expect them to replace it or find a suitable replacement or pay for the breakage? I would

Not in a MILLION YEARS would I expect a friend to replace a glass they accidentally broke. I can't imagine any of my friends asking for payment, it's so UNfriendly!

@LookItsMeAgain

If each guest broke just one glass and didn't leave some form of compensation, then after 6 or eight guests, they'd be out of glasses. Not normal wear and tear.

After 6 or 8 guests, they'll have a few thousand pounds in the bank account and could buy a couple of 4 packs of glasses for £8! It IS normal wear and tear and basically a consumable, just like tea, coffee and sugar, just like loo rolls, just like washing up liquid/dishwasher tablets, kitchen foil, just like a bar of soap in the bathroom.

Any professional holiday home owner will have "spares" that they can put in on changeover day, or even better, will already provide extras in the kitchen cupboards so they'll be plenty for the next guests even if the cleaners don't notice one has been broken.

They're insane if they're providing any kind of "quality" glassware that costs more than a pound or two per glass and/or don't have a few spares of everything in their store cupboards ready for changeover day.

But offering to replace a glass if you break it in a friend’s home - where presumably you are not paying for a service - is totally different to breaking a glass in a place where you have paid to be accommodated! Why are people trying to make the comparison? The cottage owner is not your friend, you are paying them for a service!

I wouldn't expect them to replace it. Absolutely not.

But I would expect them to at least mention it to me and apologise - I just think that's the least you can do when you break something. To me it's just basic manners.

If I was asked to pay for something that cost less than a fiver that I accidentally broke in a friend's house - that would probably end up being a mumsnet thread and the end of the friendship.
Completely different if it was something of value, I would obviously pay then.

well I'm not sneaking about their house drinking alone. presumably they're with me when I smash the wine glass...

anyway, the friend's house thing is irrelevant to the OP.

But even if it happened right in front of them, my instinct would be to say "Oh God, I'm so sorry! Let me clean it up for you." I wouldn't just say nothing and sweep it up.

what?

PP's have said they wouldn't even think to mention a breakage to the cottage owner as it's "just one of those things".

I'm saying that my instinct would be to apologise whether the person was in front of me or not, because it's just basic manners to apologise when you break something, even if it was a complete accident.

Not sure what's so hard to understand

because you've gone off on some odd tangent where you're comparing dropping a glass in your friend's house, in front of said friend to breaking a wine glass in a holiday let.

You are completely not unreasonable!! Small breakages are to be expected and definitely part of wear and tear (and it's really helpful if people leave a note so we know). Sorry you were given so much grief by the owner and on here!

I wouldn't even have said anything 😂

It was a middle-aged couple who lived in another cottage further up the same road. They definitely didn’t have “holiday let empire” vibes.

I’ve asked around family and friends and the only people who are even vaguely aware of this “rule” for breakages are aged 60+ so I think you’re right, that it’s probably an old-fashioned custom and the owners haven’t really kept up with the times.

You really have no idea how wrong you are on this, do you?

Do you have any actual friends?

@OtterlyMad

Wine glasses are always getting broken (as are other glasses). Cups and plates don't tend to get broken, but they frequently get chipped so have to be replaced.

I regard all this sort of thing as ordinary wear and tear, and wouldn't dream of expecting a guest to pay for a broken wine glass any more than I would expect my children to!

I do appreciate it if guests let me know, though. Ideally during their stay, so I can bring a replacement with me from home (I have a supply of everything, so that the replacement items match the ones already there)!

@CountZacular

Considering airBnB owners expect you to both clean to an high standard AND pay an extortionate cleaning fee, there’s no way I’d also pay a tip on top of that

I don't think holiday let owners expect you to clean to a super-high standard. On the whole, it's fine just not to leave your stinky rubbish such as nappies and sanitary towels scattered across the floor, or to at least try to clean up your vomit (to use two recent examples of things I've encountered).

The correct thing to do was inform the owner of an accidental breakage and offer to pay for replacement. That way she knows to provide a new wine glass for next client.

Most reasonable owners would reply "thanks so much for letting me know; no problem, these things happen" and cover the cost themselves. A small price to pay for good customer relations.

(I've been both the owner and the guest in that situation).

It's not an odd tangent in the slightest

It follows on from earlier comments in the thread.

The nearest supermarket was a 25 minute drive away, so would have ended up adding at least an hour to our already very long drive home (7+ hours). Fair enough if you want to call me unreasonable but I wouldn’t have been prepared to do that!

At the last place we stayed my two year old accidentally broke a side plate so I wrote the owner a note explaining and left €10 on the table to cover a replacement IKEA set.

I would have felt so guilty not saying anything.

Having been on both sides of this situation I think the owner IBU.

You did the right thing by not trying to hide it. If you rent out property then you should stock it up with cheap but reasonable items that can be easily and quickly replaced.

We bought a big box of wine glasses from a catering wholesalers. They look nice but are sturdy and don't break easily. If one does break you just get another one out of the box. The cost of this should come under wear and tear.