I know lots of people will probably think I'm being unreasonable but here goes...
Growing up, my father was abusive to me (physically and mentally and also emotionally neglectful). As an adult, I decided to forgive him as he admitted his wrong doing and seemed to be making an effort. I must add that he is a drinker. He will deny he has a problem but I spent every friday in the pub after school, my parents drank every Saturday night and were drunk and he'd go out sunday as well as drinking in the house. He's cut down his home drinking but still drinks every weekend to excess.
I have children. They've never been great at seeing the kids and when they do see them they spend an hour then go but fine. Since new year it's got worse. My dad has a tendency to go cold and not speak when he's in a mood and he spent 2 months doing that to me and mum before snapping out of it. No reason given. He has seen his grandkids twice in 6 months despite driving and living only 10 min drive away. He spends nearly every weekend at the pub around the corner from my house but hasn't once come to see the kids before he's gone there and so I've stopped making effort and I don't offer to drive to his either. My elsest son can't stand him when he's drunk. Anyway, after only seeing them twice in 6 months and making no effort despite being round the corner nearly every week drinking alcohol, he's invited us to his next week for a get together where drinking will obviously be involved. I feel like if you can't see your grandkids when your close by every week why should I make effort to bring them to you now? Also why is it he only wants to make effort when drink is involved. Am I being unreasonable not to go? Do I ask my children who are a teenager and a 10 year old and see if they want to and then just do it even though I'm going to be annoyed? Do I say something to him?
Thanks