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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

…to not pay nursery the two months notice?

33 replies

IDontDrinkTea · 10/06/2023 20:29

I am planning on pulling my DS out of nursery. He has had a few incidents recently that I have been unhappy about the standard of care he’s received. I therefore don’t want to pay the two months notice that is in the contract I signed, because I believe they’ve breached the contract first by not looking after him properly. Is this unreasonable?

For context, these incidents involve not noticing he’d been attacked by another child, not calling me when he had an allergic reaction and instead putting him to bed to “sleep it off” (plus giving him the food he’s allergic to in the first place) and another time he came home injured and they have no explanation for how it happened.

I will obviously never be taking him back there again, but do I still have to pay two months notice?

YABU - pay the nursery
YANBU - don’t pay

OP posts:
rightioly · 10/06/2023 20:31

What is the exact wording re cancelling.
I'm wondering if you could claim the service isn't what was advertised.

MrsMenmen · 10/06/2023 20:33

I did this recently and they of course asked for the money, I said no and that was the end of it.

Sonnywith · 10/06/2023 20:34

They have staff to pay so YABU

pinksquash13 · 10/06/2023 20:36

YANBU

UpaladderwatchingTV · 10/06/2023 20:36

Personally, I would write them a formal letter stating your reasons for removing your DS from the nursery, and stating that as they have clearly failed in their duty of care, that you will not be paying the usual notice fees.

TempyBrennan · 10/06/2023 20:37

I didn’t pay our notice - we had similar issues and it was around the 20th of the month. There communication was awful and my daughter ended up on hospital, I said I was paid up till the end of the moment and would appreciate it if that was the end of the matter.

They never replied, never called and deleted me off all the apps etc. still don’t know how they’re an award winning nursery to be honest 😂

DisquietintheRanks · 10/06/2023 20:38

Well you can try. But unless you can prove they've been negligent they can just take you to the small claims court and they'll likely win.

cyncope · 10/06/2023 20:44

not calling me when he had an allergic reaction and instead putting him to bed to “sleep it off” (plus giving him the food he’s allergic to in the first place)
If you immediately pulled him out after this incident I'd have said fair enough, this is extremely serious and a clear breach of contract on their part.

HidingFromDD · 10/06/2023 20:53

I got taken to small claims court for something similar, although note it was over 20 years ago. They also took my friend to court a month earlier. My friend lost and was ordered to pay the notice period. I actually won. The argument was that standards of care had dropped significantly in previous 6 months. They countered that it hadn’t and they had a waiting list for places. The person hearing checked that they had filled the place immediately, which they confirmed. They then ruled that there was no actual loss and therefore the notice period did not need to be paid. I’m sure someone legal could give more information on the basis for that

Kiwano · 10/06/2023 20:53

If they are in breach of contract, you don't have to give notice. But you need to be sure the breaches are fully evidenced.

Ponderingwindow · 10/06/2023 20:56

Accidentally feeding an allergen is a bad mistake. Not following up properly is a huge mistake. Did you pull him immediately after this incident or after a repeat incident? It so, then I think you have grounds for not paying. You should also report back them

ModerationInEverything · 10/06/2023 20:57

I'm a cm and my contact is clear that it may be ended by either party immediately if the other breaches the t and c s.
I would say failing to provide adequate care for a significant allergy is a breach.

NewNovember · 10/06/2023 21:00

staff cabt always notice every time a child is hit by another child. What kind of allergy was it it's really strange they wouldn't call you or do you mean an intolerance?

ThePoint678 · 10/06/2023 21:04

You need to carefully read the contract to determine if you have the right to terminate without notice if there’s been a breach. I assume your child didn’t go back after the allergy incident.

Separately, if the contract doesn’t say that or is unclear and it’s taken to court you could argue (a) they breached the implied terms of the contract - to keep your child safe and (b) that if they have filled the spot there are no damages as there is no loss suffered.

rightioly · 10/06/2023 21:04

Sonnywith · 10/06/2023 20:34

They have staff to pay so YABU

Tough. If they can't provide a service at a safe standard I don't see why OP should be paying for this. And I'd be reporting it to ofsted too

Mummyoflittledragon · 10/06/2023 21:10

The trust has broken down. It sounds as if they’re not providing safe and adequate care. The allergy feeding is of particular worry. I would do as the posters advising you to contact them about a breach of contract.

xyz111 · 10/06/2023 21:15

I wouldn't either. And if they kick up a fuss, I would say that you're going to put a complain into ofsted (if you're uk of course). I would complain anyway! Imagine if your child had a life threatening allergy?

Newname211 · 10/06/2023 21:20

NewNovember · 10/06/2023 21:00

staff cabt always notice every time a child is hit by another child. What kind of allergy was it it's really strange they wouldn't call you or do you mean an intolerance?

I think the mother probably knows if their child is allergic to something or not. What an ignorant comment 🙄

My daughter is allergic to milk, not intolerant. She doesn’t require an epi pen/antihistamine, but it is still an allergy.

NewNovember · 10/06/2023 23:31

Newname211 · 10/06/2023 21:20

I think the mother probably knows if their child is allergic to something or not. What an ignorant comment 🙄

My daughter is allergic to milk, not intolerant. She doesn’t require an epi pen/antihistamine, but it is still an allergy.

Show quote history

A nursery doesn't ignore genuine allergies or they would be shut down by Ofsted. It's not unusual for people to mix up allergies and intolerances and would explain why ( still obviously not ok) the nursery didn't take it as seriously.

Newname211 · 10/06/2023 23:43

NewNovember · 10/06/2023 23:31

A nursery doesn't ignore genuine allergies or they would be shut down by Ofsted. It's not unusual for people to mix up allergies and intolerances and would explain why ( still obviously not ok) the nursery didn't take it as seriously.

Show quote history

Again you are showing your ignorance.

First, Ofsted only applies in England.

Second, I believe you are confusing non ige allergies with intolerances.

Thirdly, I believe a parent will know whether their child has an ige allergy/non ige allergy/intolerance. I do not believe parents make this mistake about their own children.

Finally, it is incredibly common for allergies to be overlooked by nursery staff. It happened to my child on two occasions. It’s happened in the nursery where a family member works too. And it’s happened to my friends daughter at nursery.

Nursery don’t just decide to “not take something seriously” - wtf?!

Florissant · 11/06/2023 00:00

DisquietintheRanks · 10/06/2023 20:38

Well you can try. But unless you can prove they've been negligent they can just take you to the small claims court and they'll likely win.

I hope that's the case.

pinkginfizz9 · 11/06/2023 00:11

How long ago did the allergy thing happen? If you didnt pull him out immediately ie next day, I dont think you have a case. The other 2incidents you mention are par for the course really. They cannot be looking at every child every second

Original poster
IDontDrinkTea · 11/06/2023 06:24

Thanks for the responses.

The allergy thing was the most recent day he was at nursery, and yes I won’t be sending him back there.

I don’t know why it’s relevant, but it’s definitely an allergy and not an intolerance. I have no proof of what he ate but he had all the symptoms of an allergic response (hives etc). This is not the first time it’s happened - about two weeks ago I picked up a child who was vomiting because he’d been given ice cream.

And yes I appreciate they have to pay their staff. But I also have to now take time off work until I’ve found somewhere new to take him, plus then pay somewhere new, and I can’t afford to pay for two nurseries at the same time.

OP posts:
GoodChat · 11/06/2023 06:43

I wouldn't pay them on the basis you're saying. They failed in their duty of care.

My little one often comes home with bumps they can't explain, but they're honest and she's wild so that's par for the course IMO.

The allergy - depending what it is they might have just not realised it was in the food, which is still unacceptable, but the actions that followed are a huge safety issue.

Reugny · 11/06/2023 07:30

NewNovember · 10/06/2023 23:31

A nursery doesn't ignore genuine allergies or they would be shut down by Ofsted. It's not unusual for people to mix up allergies and intolerances and would explain why ( still obviously not ok) the nursery didn't take it as seriously.

Show quote history

Yes nurseries can ignore allergies.

When a friend sent her children to nursery one of whom haf known allergies, they fed the child stuff they had been warned the child was allergic to, she was advised that complain to OFSTED at the same time as pulling them out.

OFSTED did SFA with her complaint.

The nursery's arguement was that their catering was award winning, even though every other nursery at the time had put up clear signs that a common allergen was not to be allowed in their buildings. (Some nurseries are on premises that are used for other things at the weekend so I'm use to seeing the signs.)