Are all films <5 years problematic in some way

[anon666]

I guess it might be a sign of rapid progress, but recently I've watched:

Pretty Woman
Dirty Dancing
Bend it like Beckham

All of which have a girl/woman falling for an authority figure. It really looks creepy to a modern eye. Or does it? Am I being too Gen Z about the whole thing?

Are you asking if all films in the history of cinema made before a certain date are problematic? Did not pick up on the Dirty Dancing bit where a much older woman using him, the husband pays him and then goes off to another guy. Why is that not problematic? Pretty Woman I never understood that one. The romcom around prostitution -unrealistic, unpleasant and sending a dodgy message.

Some films the image they push should be questioned. And to some extent it's a good thing that things are always revaluated. Some films, if they are more serious, are just meant to show the reality of a situation. But not all films are made to teach a lesson, neither should they be.

I know you're meant to separate the artist from the art etc, but I was channel hopping yesterday and came across Mel Gibson in "What Women Want" and just kept thinking "probably not to be battered and have to take out a restraining order" so had to switch over.

I used to love Leo DiCaprio and can't stand his acting now. There are babies not even born yet that he will date one day.

Shhh!

Nobody makes insulting comments about Gen X because we keep very quiet, let the Boomers/Millennials/Gen Z fight each other, and hope they forget we're here.

A friend just now sent this. What timing.

A generation so dull, nobody noticed you? Meanwhile, millennials over here still occasionally getting blamed for whatever "young people today" are up to, even as our children start graduating from university

He's not really that much older though. He's meant to be early 20s. I think in RL they were 27 and 34 though so it looks odd as she looks young and he doesn't really. 17 and 24 is not a massive age gap. People baby 17 yos now but when I was 17, 25 years ago 17 yos were much more mature and it wouldn't have been a huge imbalance to go out with a 24 yo. Depending on the people involved of course. I personally think people are trying to make out DD is something it's not to suit their own agenda.

People baby 17 yos now but when I was 17, 25 years ago 17 yos were much more mature and it wouldn't have been a huge imbalance to go out with a 24 yo.

No, 17 year olds weren't more mature 25 years ago than now. What 17 yos were was put at risk at college etc in ways that we no longer find acceptable. I was 17 around that time and was manipulated by a 19 yo compulsive liar with no job and no driver's licence. At 18, I was emotionally abused by a 30 yo with a job and licence. I had no concept of red flags and how to deal with abusive men. My neurotypical peers were only a little less vulnerable.

But Baby wasn't 17 25 years ago because the movie was set in the '60s. And I would say a 17-year-old dating a man in his early twenties probably wasn't super uncommon during that time period. And Baby was portrayed as being much more mature than her sister who was older.

Johnny is used by the older women at the club. He isn’t really free to turn down the sex and gifts they offer. To say he is the person in power is completely untrue.

he loses his job, not because he slept with Baby, but because he upset one of the mature women he was servicing. She reported him to management and that is was gets him fired. We don’t even know exactly what she reports.

johnny also isn’t free to have relationships with the daughters, and not because he is older . He is roughly the same age as Robbie. He isn’t a college boy so he isn’t good enough for those girls.

The only person who has less power than Johnny is Penny.

I thought Johnny was sacked because they thought he was nicking wallets?

Pretty Woman was always problematic

at the time many actresses were questioning why there was such a nonsense story knowing how many young women come to LA to work in the film industry. I remember going to see it in the cinema and coming out thinking well that’s all a load of ridiculous negative nonsense

i can’t remember the reasoning behind Dirty Dancing isn’t a young women pushed into having a termination j no it sure if this was shown with sensitivity or not

i can’t remember the reasoning behind Dirty Dancing isn’t a young women pushed into having a termination j no it sure if this was shown with sensitivity or not

Penny is pregnant out of wedlock in pre-Roe America, ends up seriously ill from a backstreet abortion. She's not pushed into it by a person as much as by her circumstances IIRC

I don't really have a problem with relationships with an age gap, I think people way overestimate its importance. People of similar ages, with similar backgrounds, and similar incomes, get into shitty exploitative relationships all the time.Teens who date other teens often have shitty relationships if they are immature but no one seems to want to ban that. Which would probably be the more sensible approach if that was the real worry.

The obsession that Gen Z seems to have with puritanism and assuming the effects of very simplistic visions of power dynamics is odd. There seems to be a very flat understanding of human relations.

Sure they were. They were more independent, often more well read, typically had been working at least part time, sometimes had even finished school and were supporting themselves. Most 17 year olds had real responsibilities in the family.

My aunt was married and had a baby at 17, she'd been working for a year at that point and lived on her own.

My husband, at 13, went with two friends the same age on a backwoods camping trip that lasted a week, in the wilderness, without any adults.

Kids from much younger walked alone to school, or played out all day, with no contact with parents.

These kinds of experiences drive brain maturation.

I don't think this is true. I have a 19 and nearly 17 yo, they are about as mature as I was at their respective ages. At 18/19 I went out with a PHD student who was running a tutor group. Even though I approached him, I still think there was a power imbalance.

The movie was set in 1963. The average age women were married in US has changed dramatically since then. Baby was going off to the peacecorp soon, I think?

https://www.pbs.org/wgbh/americanexperience/features/pill-mrs-america-womens-roles-1950s/#:~:text=In%20the%201950s%2C%20women%20felt,college%20was%20considered%20the%20norm.

*VitoCorleoneOfMNMafia
Have you seen Twelve Years A Slave? I wouldn't call it "sanitised".

I haven’t but whilst it’s not sanitised it does fit an agenda.*

What "agenda" might that be? You do know it was based on a true story, right?

This 👆

Besides, there are also some good strong female lead films that are not recent.

Alien (1979) and Dawn of the Dead (1978) spring to mind.

The agenda of telling the story of a real real who was sold into slavery?

That's certainly not my experience and also 19 yo with a 17 yo would not be alarming even now. It is all done to the specific person. By 18 I was in a full time local authority job and renting my own place. Things are very different now IMO and experience. 18 and 30 is quite a different gap than we are talking about though.

We won't all have the same experiences.

Exactly. Kids are babied now, this isn't just parents fault, it is a lot to do with how things are generally now too but so many parents (as its clear on here) seem to censor way too much. If you think an older film sends a wrong message then discuss it. I absolutely love some of the films mentioned but I certainly don't live my life in the same way nor encourage my kids to either.

Power imbalances are all over the place, one person has more money, a stronger personality, more social cache, education, social class, whatever. That doesn't make a relationship, be it romantic, friendship, a family relationship, whatever, exploitative. It may affect how the relationship operates, and maybe undermine it, but most of the time, it doesn't.

Personally I don't agree people are babied now. Young people were exposed to higher risks when I was young, of employment exploitation, sexual exploitation, harassment, violence. Those practices were not positive and the lives of my children have been better than the lives I remember from my school days.

My children were adults when adults, they are independent and capable.

So at what age do you think a woman can safely decide who to date?