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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Wanting to spend time with my folks visiting from abroad?

2 replies

MagpieMomma · 09/06/2023 09:35

I’m a long time lurker, first time poster. We were supposed to visit my folks in 2020, but obv that didn’t happen. Now my kids are in uni/college and we don’t have a long enough break to go out during their summer, so instead they’ve come out here to see us, as well as my sister and her family. I paid for one air ticket as they couldn’t afford both.
They’re splitting their time between staying with me, and my sister.

Now my AIBU is this - I have a hobby that my dad is super keen to try, I’m doing it tomorrow. I suggested they all meet us so he can have a go (there are options for those not doing the hobby) but my sister said she couldn’t because they’re cooking a beef joint that needs hours of looking after for dinner. So I then suggested we switch to the morning instead, and she then said she doesn’t know what time her 21yr old son gets back so can’t commit.
I feel like she’s blocking me from spending time with my folks, I know they’re with her but she complains if she has them for longer than I do, and they don’t do anything with them other than sit in the garden drinking and bbq’ing every night. We’re going to Scotland with them during our time with them, and it’s because I know how keen my dad is on trying my hobby that I’m trying to organise this. Tomorrow is the only day I can do it before they come to me and we head to Scotland.

Sorry, I know there’s nothing I can do but it makes me feel sad that she’s blocking me and essentially our dad from having fun. She has form for this, last time they came out we were both holidaying 30 min apart, but I wasn’t allowed to see them as she says her holiday time is for getting away, reading, fishing and relaxing, not for sightseeing or socialising. During a regular holiday I totally accept this, but when our folks are out from so far away it seems unfair to take this attitude.

OP posts:
LittleOwl153 · 09/06/2023 09:39

Is your dad aware of the option to do this hobby? What's his view?

Is he relying on sister for transport- could you collect him?

MagpieMomma · 09/06/2023 13:25

No, not entirely. I started suggesting it with everyone around, but was cut off by my sister because of her dinner plans. I could pick my folks up, but this would add an extra hour on for me, but am happy to do so if it comes to it. The issue is though that while they’re with her, I’m not allowed to encroach on ‘her time’ with them.

OP posts:
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