School Safeguarding Concern

[ItsMyGoldenHour]

Name changed as outing. The week before half term I got a call from school to say my son had fallen and possibly broken his arm. I took him to hospital and contacted the school as I could tell I wasn’t getting the whole story from my son. They told me as far as they knew he had fallen and their concern was getting his arm attended to.

I took him to hospital and he had snapped the bone ja shad a fracture and was lucky not to need surgery. The following day I had a call from the head of year asking if I knew what had happened. I told her I was told he’d fallen but didn’t believe it. She then went on to tell me that an older boy had come over to my sons friendship group on the school field at break time and bet them they couldn’t push one of the others over. The teachers story is my son agreed which he insists he didn’t but was pushed over. This resulted in the broken arm. They had taken statements from his friends and agreed it was more rough play than anything serious and more stupidity than maliciousness.

My son has come home today and told me that one of his friends has gone to hospital with a suspected broken arm as someone had slide tackled him on the field at break ‘as a joke’.

I really feel like I want to contact the school again and raise concerns about this as how can two children break their arms in a few weeks as a ‘joke’.

My son doesn’t want me to ‘be a Karen’ but surely this needs addressing? I don’t know what the answer is but it sounds like no one is supervising anything as no teachers/staff saw this happen to my son or this boy.

I just don't really see what you would contact them about? You've already been in contact with them about your son, the other boy has nothing to do with you and you aren't involved at all.

How old is your son?

Teachers are not supervising all pupils at all times during breaks, particularly when they get older. It isn't feasible.

Well because there is a pattern of similar injuries which could be linked? Worth pointing out, surely? Fractures are serious injuries and will impact their lives for weeks at least.

For context I had two sons who managed to get through education (and to the best of my knowledge so did their friends) without any such injuries.

Sporting injuries yes, definitely. Playground, no.

I am a secondary school first aider ,I see lots of boys messing about type of injuries! I have to record every single visit to first aid , and complete incident reports for more serious injuries, ie broken bones . These go to the business manager , and possibly on to the council , one of the reasons for these reports is to see if there’s any correlation between various injuries and something else, perhaps equipment failure, loose flooring etc etc .

We don’t just go fuck it , it’s just a couple of broken arms, what’s the problem!

Definitely address this with school. I did for a game where boys were punchibg one anothers arms to the point of bruising in a so called game, never mind fractures. (Please stop using Karen in this derogatory way)

I would imagine that this 2nd incidnet will trigger some sort of review anyway - its not something you may know about, you have no idea what they are now doing behind the scenes.

Yes raise it. Tell them you don't want it disclosing that your son told you. But the more info they have the better they can respond to it and put things in place.

She isn't using "Karen", she's quoting her son. I hate it too, though.

OP this isn't good enough. The school have a duty to keep children safe, and they aren't doing so. Make sure you have every detail in writing - what happened and when, who di and didn't report what, any correspondence. Ask for a meeting with the HOY and take it all with you. Make notes before you go, because they will try to take control of the meeting and you won't get to speak unless you go in organised. What you need from them is a concrete plan for preventing violent incidents going forward, and a clear assurance of how any issues that do occur are handled - there were multiples failures here, and it can't continue.

You think the school doesn’t know about the second broken arm? What extra information has the OP got to pass on?

The second incident had nothing to do with the OP or her son, so the school quite rightly won’t discuss it with her. Why do you think she has some insight they don’t have, or that they won’t be reviewing procedures anyway?

I’m pretty sure the school don’t need it pointed out that someone broke their arm in the playground. I imagine they are quite aware. OP doesn’t know any other details nor does she know what the school are doing.
It just seems odd to assume the school wouldn’t know. I’m sure the child’s parents were called.

What would be in a plan to prevent "violent incidences" going forward because you can have the most beautiful looking policies on realms of paper with an abundance of supervision and if kids want to act the maggots and push and slide tackle you will not prevent it.

If this had been my son and it wasn't an accident/isolated incident then I would want to know what the school are doing about it.
Of course boys will rough and tumble and accidents happen, but a trend that's leading quite serious injury needs addressing.

Two broken arms within a couple of weeks! Breaking a teenage boy's arm is not an easy thing to do. I'd be back on to the HT, making it clear that you think there is a more serious issue and you expect them to step in. If there is another incident this term, I suggest you contact the Chair of Governors and start asking loud and pointed questions on social media. Someone will know what is going on.

What does your son say happened to him?

I don’t know what you think you can do about the second incident.

What is the issue? Lack of supervision? If so ask about that.

If you think there is a violent sub culture in the school that’s being hidden by teachers I think you might need a bit more to go off.

The following day I had a call from the head of year asking if I knew what had happened. I told her I was told he’d fallen but didn’t believe it. She then went on to tell me that an older boy had come over to my sons friendship group on the school field at break time and bet them they couldn’t push one of the others over. The teachers story is my son agreed which he insists he didn’t but was pushed over. This resulted in the broken arm. They had taken statements from his friends and agreed it was more rough play than anything serious and more stupidity than maliciousness.

Wait a minute! Why did the school asked if you knew what happened AFTER they had "investigated" the incident and decided it was just horseplay?

Your sons version means theirs is crap. Someone , possibly staff, has made your son cover up the truth. I'd immediately say to them "That is NOT what happened to my son."

What if the second fracture was caused by the same older boy? I'd certainly want to know if the two incidents involved the same bullies.

In your shoes I would be making a formal written complain atbout the school's handling of serious injuries; and if the boys concerned are older, I'd take it to police for investigation.

The next child they hurt might not get off with a broken arm.

Well, just off the top of my head - I'd expect more supervision at known flashpoints for the behaviour (in our case this was the changing rooms, DS was regularly beaten up there), clear and consistent application of the behaviour policy including consequences for breaking it, a commitment to honest, same-day reporting of incidents to parents (cover-ups are rife in schools, especially when it comes to violence and bullying), safe spaces available for children to retreat to if they feel they are at risk (we had to fight for this one, but it did happen eventually)

It's not being "that parent" or "a Karen" to expect - and demand - basic safeguarding standards in schools. You do have to use your elbows a bit, but when the alternative is having your child come home covered in blood on a regular basis, you learn pretty quickly.

Ages would be useful.
Is this a 5 year old pushing a 4 year old, or a 17 year old pushing an 11 year old?

I'd contact the parents of the other injured child to compare notes. About their childs version of their injury, which other children were involved, and how the school explained it to the parents.

My son doesn’t want me to ‘be a Karen’

Possibly because he's been intimidated/ silenced?

Agreed. A broken limb is a notifiable injury.

It's definitely worth checking the school are taking it seriously and talking to the other parents.

Many schools build into their environments and routines measures to prevent things getting out of control eg one way corridors and staggered breaks. It's possible that they're not currently dealing well with multiple year groups out on a big field. Schools have more kids with social and relational problems IME, possibly lockdown and poverty related.

Please don't use the misogynist (and in the UK classist) term Karen and fgs don't tolerate your son doing so either otherwise he's one of tomorrow's misogynists. We really don't need any more.

How old are they?

These boys sound like absolute idiots and I remember similar dates in my school until a girl almost broke her back and then it never happened again.

I would speak to the school although I’m sure they’re already aware of the situation and why it’s so concerning but I’d also tell your son that he needs to be 100% honest to understand what’s going on and stop them being so stupid.

My school would have an assembly about this and put in very strict sanctions like suspensions for doing any sort of dare and may even get the police involved.

School governor here. The same at my school. Would so much easier to just say ah fuck it, boys eh? But that's not how safeguarding is supposed to work. We can't keep anyone safe if just shrug things off.

Thanks for the replies I appreciate it. Initially my son told me he fell. It was only when his form tutor overheard his friends discussing how he was pushed that statements were taken and I was contacted. He is 13 and in Year 8. The boy who dared them to be pushed over was in Year 10 and it was another Year 8 boy who did it. It was at lunchtime and he went to his next lesson as normal. He said he started feeling sweaty, sick and dizzy and realised he couldn’t move his arm. When he told his teacher he thought he’d broken it the teacher said “You haven’t broken it or you would be crying!”.

My concern is that this other boy is in his friendship group of around 8 boys and it just seems coincidental to me that twice in three weeks there have been broken bones. (Now confirmed broken). My sons was brushed off as boys being immature and silly but I’m worried there’s more to it. This boy was actually my sons chaperone whilst his arm is broken (leaving lessons 5 mins earlier to avoid crowds etc) and now he has a broken arm too.

My son had insisted he had fallen until the Head of Year rang me and told me. I am an over thinker so might be looking into it too much.