Parents are so critical

[User0311]

Am I being unreasonable to be upset about this?
I am mid 30s, have 3 children of primary school age, I feel I have achieved a lot of good things in my life. Yet still constantly seek approval from my overly critical parents. They have never once said they are proud of anything iv accomplished. Now I have my own children I cant imagine never being positive about what they are doing in life.

There are plenty of people who do not see the need to praise or tell their children how wonderful they are. This maybe strange to you - but you are not them and probably have had this all your life

Its more important to get your self worth from yourself and not expect other people to do it - once you get to that point it gets easier - stop looking to them to give you the reassurance that they can’t give ( for whatever reason that is)

You recognise the situation, accept it and free yourself from the rejection ( I don’t mean free yourself from them - accept them for who they are)

I think the previous poster is somewhat unfair in how they've worded that response. I think having critical parents can massively shape your life for the worse. You internalise parental criticism from a young age, and your inner critic becomes a prevalent voice. Often children of critical parents become people pleasers in life and have low boundaries for unacceptable behaviour from others such as managers at work, friends or partners.

Where the pp is correct is that your job as a healthy adult (and especially as a parent yourself) is to free yourself from that and start to recognise the inner parental voice whenever it shows up. It's not easy and often takes therapy, reading, and work to dig into it and re-programme your brain.

Yeah wow if only it was as easy as waving a magic wand and not caring what your parents think of you. Lol.
YANBU to expect your parents to give a shit and to express that from time to time.