Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To quit my job and go back to uni in my thirties?

36 replies

Lottie2267 · 07/06/2023 08:01

Im in my thirties and doing well in my job but I hate it and don’t enjoy the field I work in. DH and I have tried for a baby, multiple losses later we have decided that we won’t be trying any more. Therefore, I feel like now is the time for me to go after my dreams instead? I always thought I would grow up and have kids and I never really thought about my career. I would love to do a degree in dietetics but this would be a 4 year course as I would need to a foundation year first. I think financially we could just about manager although it would be a struggle. The uni is also an hours drive away, maybe we could move slightly closer if this is something I do decide to do. Am I being ridiculous or do you think I should go for it? Be brutally honest. Thank you xx

OP posts:
Toomuchmarking · 07/06/2023 08:07

As you may be able to tell from my name I work at a university 😀
Do it! I teach many people in their 30's and older. I find them to be more engaged, interested and committed than a lot of younger students who are more interested in the social side. People often sacrifice more to come and want to get the most out of it. I know someone who went back into education in their 30's and loved education so much they now have a PhD and head up a research department. It's not easy but can be so rewarding.

Toomuchmarking · 07/06/2023 08:10

Happy to answer any questions you may have.

Blancmangemouse · 07/06/2023 08:24

Not too late, absolutely go for it!

Personally though I would consider spending your money (or at least some of it) on holidays, hobbies, pets or other things that make you happy. 4 years of study sounds like hard, expensive work!

drpet49 · 07/06/2023 08:27

“I think financially we could just about manager although it would be a struggle. The uni is also an hours drive away, maybe we could move slightly closer if this is something I do decide to do.”

^And what does your husband think of your plan? I wouldn’t be happy to struggle and move away if my husband decided to do a degree.

ISeeMisledPeople · 07/06/2023 08:27

You are likely to have thirty working years left.

You have to do what makes you happy.

Go for it!

redskylight · 07/06/2023 08:29

I wouldn't give up my financial independence, so if I wanted to study it would be part time.

What's the long term career plan once you have your degree? Is there any other way to achieve it without getting a degree?

Elfandwellbeing · 07/06/2023 08:30

Do it ! I’m 40s and managed just fine. 30 ‘s is not too late. If your dh can support you financially then go for it. The hours drive away is more of a concern than the degree.

Lastqueenofscotland2 · 07/06/2023 08:31

I did it in my late twenties BUT it wasn’t a struggle and I didn’t have to move.

RoxyMuzak · 07/06/2023 08:35

I did an OU degree in modern languages from 45 to 52. Could be an alternative to quitting work. I did have to arrange a couple of week long field trips, and there were tutorials to go to, it's probably all done by Zoom these days. I love the letters they send addressed to Ms Roxy Muzak BA. Nobody IRL outside of me and DH know about the BA.

Original poster
Lottie2267 · 07/06/2023 08:50

Thank you all so much for your replies, sorry I can’t respond to all but very much appreciated!

@Toomuchmarking that’s great to know, thanks very much!

@drpet49 I have supported my husband for the last 5 years! He bought a house before we got together which has taken 7 years to renovate. In this time, he has moved into my house and I have paid the majority of bills so has been able to afford to renovate his house. We are now married so no longer his / hers. Also I’m not suggesting we move to the uni, just maybe 30 mins closer. He works from home and would actually be moving closer to some friends. His family would still only be a 20 min drive. I have obviously discussed this all with him.

@redskylight the degree is funded by the NHS. I would be a registered dietician once the degree is completed and would then need to commit to working as a registered NHS dietician for two years after. I live in Wales.

OP posts:
RoxyMuzak · 07/06/2023 08:51

Can I just issue a silent plea for the word 'university'? The poor thing has been so chopped off in the last 10 to 20 years.

JandalsAlways · 07/06/2023 08:53

You do you. You only live once, I'd go for it!

Spirallingdownwards · 07/06/2023 08:56

Go for it. I qualified at the age of 31.

abyssofwoah · 07/06/2023 08:58

Do it! You’ve had your original plans for the future taken out of your control, it sounds like the perfect time to reassess and take charge of what that new version of your future is. Good luck to you!

emmylousings · 07/06/2023 09:03

Blancmangemouse · 07/06/2023 08:24

Not too late, absolutely go for it!

Personally though I would consider spending your money (or at least some of it) on holidays, hobbies, pets or other things that make you happy. 4 years of study sounds like hard, expensive work!

Completely misses the point.
Holidays etc are fleeting, OPs looking for meaningful career and intellectual development.
I used to teach adults in FE, heading for uni. 30s is quite young for mature student. Go for it OP. Note you might not need to move...probably only in uni a few days a week.

Blancmangemouse · 07/06/2023 09:33

emmylousings · 07/06/2023 09:03

Completely misses the point.
Holidays etc are fleeting, OPs looking for meaningful career and intellectual development.
I used to teach adults in FE, heading for uni. 30s is quite young for mature student. Go for it OP. Note you might not need to move...probably only in uni a few days a week.

Show quote history

I don’t think I missed the point at all. And I told her she is not too old and to absolutely go for it!

I also shared my own, personal, perspective on what I would do. As somebody who went back to university myself for 4 years of postgraduate study and made a complete career change on the back of this, I have realised that while I do prefer my current job, it is far from perfect and there are different things that stress me out quite a lot. Plus I approached burnout from the all the studying and am now too broke to do many of the things I mentioned in my previous thread. In hindsight, dropping the mindset of ‘the right job will bring me happiness’ and instead pouring my energy into life outside of the workplace would have saved me rather a lot of time and money.

All personal anecdote of course, which is why I didn’t put all of this down in the first place. But just because I offer an alternative perspective doesn’t mean I miss the point!

Blancmangemouse · 07/06/2023 09:33

Also, good holidays are not fleeting - they bring memories and experiences that last a lifetime!

unfor · 07/06/2023 09:35

Go for it. I am retraining at the age of 48 and wish I had done it ten years ago. It's great!

chupachucks · 07/06/2023 09:37

I did this at 40, now very happy iny new career earning more than I could have dreamed about in my last career. Do it 😁

I've never looked back.

MasterBeth · 07/06/2023 09:38

Blancmangemouse · 07/06/2023 08:24

Not too late, absolutely go for it!

Personally though I would consider spending your money (or at least some of it) on holidays, hobbies, pets or other things that make you happy. 4 years of study sounds like hard, expensive work!

I cannot understand how building a fulfilling, rewarding life for yourself through study and hard work would make you less happy than cleaning up cat shit from your lawn, but each to their own.

Whichwhatnow · 07/06/2023 09:42

Of course go for it. I did an access course and the age range was approx 20 to 50. The oldest one on the course went on to get a first class degree at the University of Bristol and a brilliant career as a social worker. My husband is retraining as a counsellor at the age of 40. Never too old!

Blancmangemouse · 07/06/2023 10:07

MasterBeth · 07/06/2023 09:38

I cannot understand how building a fulfilling, rewarding life for yourself through study and hard work would make you less happy than cleaning up cat shit from your lawn, but each to their own.

Show quote history

Please see my response to PP.

I don’t see where the OP mentioned having a cat?

I have told the OP to go for it if it’s what she really wants and it isn’t too late.

I am also suggesting to the OP that work isn't the only way to find fulfilment, and forgive me for wondering whether a life working for the NHS and struggling financially (as the OP says they will if she takes this route) may not bring her unbridled joy.

She asked for honesty, and I am saying YES go for it, but also suggesting that she consider all other options too and asks herself some searching questions about what will bring her the fulfillment. There are many positives to a childfree life, besides working more / differently.

It’s very easy to just come on here and say “do it”, I am giving the OP a thoughtful and considered response.

Hankunamatata · 07/06/2023 10:09

I'd go for it. Time for a new dream

OrlandointheWilderness · 07/06/2023 10:12

I'm 39 and just finishing year two of a degree. Definitely say do it, even though mine has been hell at times (nursing...! 😂).

StrongandNorthern · 07/06/2023 10:14

It's an absolutely brilliant plan.
I suspect you have a very bright future ahead.
NHS funding is the icing on the cake.
Go for it!
Good Luck.