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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be considering flying alone with 3 kids?

57 replies

Anna34 · 03/06/2023 19:12

Or is it a crazy idea? Anyone has any experience or tips?
We have booked flights for myself, husband and 3 kids to my home country to stay there for 5 weeks during the summer. However looks like my husband's work circumstances are changing and he will need to return to work 2 weeks into our trip. So here is my dilemma, do we all cut it short and return to UK together earlier than planned or do I stay behind with kids and we fly back later. I want to stay all planned 5 weeks but really could do with extra pair of hands when travelling and being so outnumbered by my children. They are aged 11, 7 and 4. Youngest one is a handful, very mischievous and rules don't apply to him. 7 year old has ADHD. 11 year old is fantastic when it comes to help with younger siblings but can also wind them up. I imagine long queues, suitcases, not enough hands, trying to keep an eye on them all at the same time etc and just the thought of it fills me with dread. Or is it completely doable? It's a 3 hour flight.

OP posts:
KatieB55 · 03/06/2023 19:55

Speak to the airline. I flew to Australia on my own with 3 under 7 and they gave me assistance from check-in. Fast track security, help through airport, boarded first, off plane first and fast track through security. Amazing service from BA. It was a few years ago though.

RedRosette2023 · 03/06/2023 19:56

UndercoverCop · 03/06/2023 19:21

I wouldn't be concerned about the flight itself, just the rest of it

Same.

TwoBlueFish · 03/06/2023 19:59

Book special assistance for your child with ADHD. Airport staff will take you through check in and security which makes it much easier.

2bazookas · 03/06/2023 20:04

Ask in advance for the airline groundstaff assistance before boarding; and assistance from flight staff on board.

Original poster
Anna34 · 03/06/2023 20:12

I think flight itself would be ok. We would have to book 2+2 seats. I would sit with youngest one and other two kids together.
My husband would be away at work so nobody collecting us from airport, would have to get home by taxi and train.

OP posts:
CatsOnTheChair · 03/06/2023 20:14

If you are confident the ADHD bit can be managed, go for it.
I'm guessing everyone has flown a number of times, so will know what is coming up, and family/husband will assist with getting to/from the airports.
Yes, yes, yes to minimal hand luggage - if you can get it into one bag, the oldest could carry it? Indeed, minimal luggage full stop - I used to take the clothes we were growing out of, and leave them at the end of the holiday, topped up with some new stuff - bit then the holiday was in a place with better shopping than home!

Lovingitallnow · 03/06/2023 20:14

I'd do it with my three- younger but no ADHD. I'd make sure I could carry everything myself so max one wheels and one back pack. Tablet and headphones each. Tons of snacks. Fastrack, taxi to the airport and dh to collect. I would want to be super organized- but that calms me.

CatsOnTheChair · 03/06/2023 20:15

X'posts. DH takes half a days leave and collects you from the airport!

Howiwonderwhat · 03/06/2023 20:17

I flew long haul with 2 by myself. I've 3 now and haven't flown alone with them as I thought it was against the rules for some reason!

PaigeMatthews · 03/06/2023 20:18

TwoBlueFish · 03/06/2023 19:59

Book special assistance for your child with ADHD. Airport staff will take you through check in and security which makes it much easier.

This.

DonnatellaLyman · 03/06/2023 20:24

Even if it is misery, it’s 1 miserable day for 3 whole weeks with your family so sounds worth it.

As previous posters have said, you should be able to get assistance through the airport due to your 7yo diagnosis. Allow plenty of time, screens, games/magazines for the flight and stock up on snacks once you are through security. Minimal hand luggage. Book a taxi with car seats for the other end so it’s minimal stress when you are all tired.

I took mine aged 5, 2 and 3 weeks on a solo 4h round trip by tube/bus/train recently. Loads of gasping from parents of 1, but it was fine… and quite fun?

olympicsrock · 03/06/2023 20:27

Would be absolutely fine. I’ve travelled with 2 very young children on my own. Organised bags, lots of snacks , iPads. No issue.

Ginger1982 · 03/06/2023 20:28

You'll get people tell you that's nothing and that they travelled for 48 hours alone with 10 kids and you should just suck it up and do it because it's not that hard. But you know you and your kids best.

LadyGaGasPokerFace · 03/06/2023 20:29

Hang on, 11, 7 and 4? Easy. I took dds 13mo and 2y9m from Oz back to the Uk and back again. The 11 yo can help organise the other 2 with you. Make sure you have snack and their devices on hand. We got assistance through the airport with a cart taking us through. Thought I was the bloody queen 😂

continentallentil · 03/06/2023 20:32

It’ll be fine. Get the younger two small things to upwrap every hour to keep them busy. Bribe the elder one to not to any winding up. Take turns with the elder one to walk the little ones up and down a meal (not when the trollies are out obvs). Pay for fast track through security if you have that option.

DontBePassiveAggresive · 03/06/2023 20:35

I thinks it's doable. As long as you are prepared. Minimal baggage. Lots of snacks and either toys or screens. Go for it.

VWRabbit · 03/06/2023 20:37

I'm registered severely visually impaired, and I'm taking my four kids (aged 15 down to 7) all the way to Japan and back, totally on my own. Two of them are also being assessed for autism, so we aren't a straightforward family either 😁 It's only a relatively small amount of actual travel time , worth the stress for the reward. Implement whatever it takes...bribes, tablet/iPad, activities, food, your existing coping strategies, begging plane staff for help/distractions, anything. Life is short, may as well do it! I'm expecting to have to be ultra 'Disney parent" to get us all through it though... Plastered on smile and positivity and holding the merry band afloat..Good luck.

Iamuhtredsonofuhtred · 03/06/2023 20:37

I just got off a plane with 4 aged between 14 and 6, alone. I’m a single parent, who is going to help me? They drove me crazy but it was fine.

VWRabbit · 03/06/2023 20:39

Forgot to add, I have no one else to come with us and help. So if I don't do it, we miss out. I don't want to miss out! Even though I know there will be bumps in the road.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 03/06/2023 20:39

I only have two but have flown with them both a few times, at ages 4 and 9, 5 and 10, and 8 and 13. Youngest has ADHD but is fine with sitting on a plane.

I do take a tablet for him, and snacks

Havent got any experience with three kids I’m afraid, but I found two kids of the above ages on my own infinitely easier than one toddler with unhelpful ex husband! (Or indeed 6 and 1 yos with same ex husband)

SoupDragon · 03/06/2023 20:58

Ginger1982 · 03/06/2023 20:28

You'll get people tell you that's nothing and that they travelled for 48 hours alone with 10 kids and you should just suck it up and do it because it's not that hard. But you know you and your kids best.

Equally, you'll get people throwing their hands up in horror and telling you it will be a nightmare.

wherearethewindows · 03/06/2023 21:13

Surely one hard day is worth the extra weeks at home country where I presume you'll get help with the kids rather than alone at home while your husband works?

Pack as light as you can, get each kid to carry their own hand luggage with their own entertainment and it will be manageable.

reallyworriedjobhunter · 03/06/2023 21:16

I have three at similar ages and also with additional needs. I'd do it. It's only a short flight and mine tend to be better behaved when it's only one parent.

Nevermind31 · 03/06/2023 21:21

Anna34 · 03/06/2023 20:12

I think flight itself would be ok. We would have to book 2+2 seats. I would sit with youngest one and other two kids together.
My husband would be away at work so nobody collecting us from airport, would have to get home by taxi and train.

I would book 3 + 1 - you and two youngest, and oldest across the isle. That way your younger children are contained, but oldest is still close enough.
i have seen a single parent with 2 (presumably on the spectrum from how they behaved) being assisted by airport staff - only you know how your child behaves - of those two children, one was a runner trying to take off across the airfield whilst waiting to board, so parent could not have done it on her own.
i would ask DH to take the day off and collect you.

Simianwalk · 03/06/2023 21:22

God I thought you would say little ones. I have regularly flown with 3. Most memorably a 13 month old, 3 and 4 year old. Eldest is autistic. Hard work but just use lots of snacks, sticker books, stories and colouring books. Got through it. Carrying all the bags and pram was hard work. About a 3 and a half flight. Did it every year. Now we don't pay to sit tog6and I read a book on my own as Ryanair hasn't worked out that I would pay to be on my own 😜