To be annoyed at DH porn use?

[NCforthis47]

We are currently on our honeymoon. Everytime I use DH phone to Google something he’s been on pages called “all my links” for various girls or has porn videos on open tabs.

DH does IMO have an issue with porn (used to watch daily but has cut down afaik) but this just seems so icky as we are on our honeymoon. I do generally think masturbating is healthy and is something I do myself - at home when he’s not there and we are not on our honeymoon 🙄

we have only had sex a few times he hasn’t really initiated other than to say “shall we have sex” when we’re about to go out / I’m cooking etc.

AIBU to feel angry and a bit upset. Obviously I look nothing like these women he’s looking up.

should I bring this up? It’s our last night and I really don’t want to ruin it.

Porn on your honeymoon? Pity you married him. And you don’t want to ruin the last night… what lies ahead do you think? He won’t change.

How often do you use his phone to ‘Google something’ presumably you have posted this on your own phone?

DH has an Irish phone number , I have a UK one . I’m on wifi at the air bnb but don’t always have data when out as have a PAYG plan that doesn’t include roaming.

I have strong opinions about people who watch porn/support misogyny, so that will color my opinion here just so that you know. Anyway, here it goes:

What a fucking loser he is, his a gross man, why did you marry him if you knew this, what changed in between the few days of not married/married - just the honeymoon, why wasn’t it problem before, degradation women was fine but not on your honemoon?

Too bad you went and married a porn-watcher, though…

Jesus, just get the marriage annulled. Lie and say you haven't consummated it.

I personally don't have a problem with a partner watching porn,sometimes we will watch together how er on your honeymoon is shocking.

should I bring this up? It’s our last night and I really don’t want to ruin it

He's already ruined it for you.

Like a pp, I cannot abide the porn industry due to the objectification and degradation of women, so I am already thinking 🤢

It's your honeymoon for goodness sake.

What a sad little man you have married.

Should I bring this up? It’s our last night and I really don’t want to ruin it.

Sorry to be crass, but feels a bit like an "apart from that, how did you enjoy the play, Mrs. Lincoln?" situation. Is there anything much to ruin?

Is your sex life normally good, or had you not had it prior to marriage? Is it a situation where you get along well but maybe it's not a sexual/passionate connection? It's hard to tell, but if something is really bothering you I think you need to find a way to bring it up. But figure out first what the focus is. Do you not want him to watch porn at all? (I'm of this persuasion, for similar reasons to IsThereAnEchoInHere, but many people are not). Or is it that he's doing that but not showing interest in sex with you? Or that you feel negatively compared with the airbrushed porn stars? Or is it specifically that it's on your honeymoon? Just for example.

Be prepared to tell him what bothers you, what questions you need answered, how (if at all) you wish things could be different. Your feelings are important, but if the two of you haven't really talked about his porn habit before, expect him to act perplexed and as if it's a normal thing. You may have to spell out for him why and how it's having a detrimental impact on the relationship and on you. And if the issue is not really the porn but the sex, maybe start with that and let the porn issue come up (sorry) if and where it's relevant.