AIB unreasonable or AIB useless?

[highlydiverse]

Most days I go straight to bed after work. I put my phone on Do Not Disturb and ignore texts from friends while I browse Reddit or MN. The thought of meeting up with people is overwhelmingly stressful. I can’t be bothered to watch tv, read a book or even listen to music.

I’m an extrovert and used to thrive on contact with others but increasingly need most of my spare time all to myself.

Subjectively I don’t feel depressed, more burnt out. I don’t value each of my friends as much as I used to, some of them drain me and I don’t know why. Not everyone has that effect.

But if I am depressed, am I morally obliged to get help and try to recover or can I just accept it?

Why are you so drained, is your work stressful or unpleasant? Could it be the job that's causing you to feel this way?

It’s definitely one of the least stressful roles, if not the least stressful, in the entire organisation. Yet I am always worried about doing something wrong, or being unmasked as a fraud, or that one day I simply won’t be up to it at all.

You are not being unreasonable OR useless OP!

This sounds like a subset of depression called Anhedonia.

You can do whatever you want to do. There is no moral obligation to seek support and you are allowed to sit in this space for some time if that feels right? Of course you can just accept it... but will that give you a fulfilling and meaningful life?

I think that Covid lockdowns changed a lot of us. I can’t cope with as much company or being “out” as I used to. That might be because like everyone I’m older than I was before, but I think it hit most of us quite hard.

Anhedonia is a good fit, on the Wikipedia entry it is linked to a disorder I was diagnosed with years ago.

Definitely not been the same since lockdown. Friendship has changed somehow but I don’t know why. People who used to irritate me are now soothing to go for quiet walks with. I have no problem making myself go out to meet them even when I feel tired. I know it won’t make things worse. But people who used to be fun now feel like hard work. I don’t know what to talk about with them.