Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think employee should have asked me for assistance?

12 replies

Lis1992 · 30/05/2023 13:42

So a random one. AIBU to think my employee should have just asked me for a tissue/ excused themselves in this situation? I’m managing a department team at the moment. Had a meeting with an employee this morning. She didn’t seem herself was very fidgety etc. She came to me after to explain that she had scratched a cut on her leg during the meeting and it started bleeding. She said she was too embarrassed to ask me for a tissue etc as I had helped her with a first aid issue 2 months ago. So she didn’t want me to think she was always needing aid or something like that (I’m paraphrasing there)

So instead of just asking me she was trying to wipe
the blood during our meeting. She does talk a lot and gives extra details and she started telling me she got awkward and got the blood off her hand from licking her finger and wiping the other hand! Basically some TMI but I just reassured her all was well, not to be embarrassed and that I would have got her a wipe from the first aid kit.

AIBU to think she shouldn’t have been embarrassed just because I got her first aid for a cut previously? Or is it reasonable that she tried to hide it and manage it during our meeting! It’s not a big deal obviously I’m just curious on people’s thoughts. I was left a bit baffled by the whole exchange but then I am new to management!!

OP posts:
DiddyHeck · 30/05/2023 13:52

It's such a non-issue that it's hard to have an opinion either way to be fair 🤷‍♀️

All I think about the matter is MN is a huge public forum and you're going to feel really silly/unprofessional if she spots this.

Testina · 30/05/2023 13:58

MN AIBU is not the place to come for your management training!

FedUpBoiledFrog · 30/05/2023 14:08

I wouldn't have asked for your assistance either. It really is a non issue and so many reasons why she didn't.

She sees you as a boss not a friend/colleague so not appropriate to ask.
Ditto for asking to leave in middle of meeting, it wasn't appropriate.
She might think you wouldn't have any clean tissues to hand, only dirty ones.
She might have hoped it would stop bleeding before it actually did.
Or the main one for me...she hadn't shaved her legs yet and they were plaitable Blush

Bosses are not friends and many judge your capability to do the job on ridiculous things, ie not carrying a tissue with you at all times makes you too scatty and irresponsible. It happens.

Maverickess · 30/05/2023 14:10

I'm someone that would have done this - I'd have wanted to appear focused on the meeting and you and would then realise afterwards that I'd been fidgety and probably achieved the opposite! Which would lead me to explain and in an effort to justify myself over explain.

But I'm dyspraxic and so cuts/scrapes/bruises are a daily occurrence for me and I do tend to try and ignore because if I stopped every time (I do if I'm bleeding if it's going to impact someone else obviously) then I'd never get anything done! And I was often accused of attention seeking or had the piss taken out of me if I hurt myself and reacted to it, so I learned to not react if possible and deal with it if needed later.

I once answered a phone call and made a full booking with a bleeding hand wrapped in napkins from glass I'd been clearing up watching it seep through 🤦. A guest came to the desk as I finished and was baffled as to why I hadn't ignored the phone and dealt with my hand and insisted that I get myself sorted and they'd wait.

I think her instinct was to ignore it, deal with the meeting and the cut afterwards, but as the meeting went on she realised that it could become noticeable and if you noticed you'd be wondering why she didn't just say something - like you are now. She made the wrong call but sounds like she's realised that.

Megifer · 30/05/2023 14:11

If you're thinking about it this much she was probably right to try and style it out 🤣

BettyBananaMan · 30/05/2023 14:22

This!!

What a drama over naff all! I feel for her!

Seasonofthewitch83 · 30/05/2023 14:48

Wow, good luck talking to HR if your employee sees this.....

This is the sort of idle mindless shit you save for your partner at the end of the day.

CeliaNorth · 30/05/2023 14:59

I think it would have been best to excuse herself from the meeting for five minutes and gone and dealt with it properly. She presumably knows where the First Aid box is kept, or who to ask for it, and could get a proper dressing. (And if she doesn't know, she should, as anyone should know where/how to access First Aid in the workplace.)

Readyplayerthr33 · 30/05/2023 15:01

I really wouldn’t even call giving someone a wipe and a plaster, “first aid.”

If I were you, I think I’d have a wee think about my managing style and attitude to staff, because someone being too afraid to ask for a plaster would ring alarm bells for me. It may be totally them and their hang ups but it could be the way I treat people, so I’d want to examine that in myself.

CornishGem1975 · 30/05/2023 15:05

I don't even know why it was raised afterwards?

Original poster
Lis1992 · 30/05/2023 15:17

I get on very well with this employee. She said she was embarrassed because she was injured recently that was all. I’m the opposite of someone you’d be afraid to ask for a plaster 😂

OP posts:
Original poster
Lis1992 · 30/05/2023 15:18

Also- no HR issue. I’m simply asking what others would do in the situation- would they also be embarrassed to ask and deal with it themselves or ask. I was surprised as I’d be happy to help. Not once did I criticise my employee or say anything negative about her. 🙄

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page