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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To have been intimidated by dangerous driver

35 replies

babypanther · 30/05/2023 04:34

I had a near miss with a dangerous driver yesterday and I can’t stop thinking about it: I was driving with my partner in the front seat with me and our 3 month old baby girl in the back. As we were driving, a blue car tried to pull out into the road in front of us from a side junction, the driver was looking the other way and with absolutely no concern for the oncoming traffic, so I had to slam on my breaks and I hit my horn at him. My partner shouted at him to watch where he was going as we passed.

Next thing the blue car is tailgating us, the driver was flashing his headlights and yelling, and waving at us to pull over. I didn’t and carried on driving, at this point I was already shook up and he was literally almost bumper to bumper with us. I could also see him get his phone out as he was driving and it looked like he was either filming us or taking pictures of the car. I had to take a few turns to get rid of him from following us and eventually he gave up.

I’ve been so shook up from this all night and keep thinking if he had pulled out and hit our car with our baby in it. I‘m also worried about why he seemed to be filming/taking pictures of our car - we weren’t in the wrong as I was driving along a main road, under the speed limit, and it was my right of way. I just feel very shook up and wish I’d got his registration plate so I could have reported it. AIBU to be so shook up and intimidated?

OP posts:

Shadowworry · 30/05/2023 09:26

I pull over with doors locked and windows up and dash cam running and then just point to the dash cams filming everything - front and back

GoodChat · 30/05/2023 09:26

@AmazonAmazine it's exactly the point.
Everyone could have behaved better and the whole situation would have been avoided.

AmazonAmazine · 30/05/2023 09:28

GoodChat · 30/05/2023 09:26

@AmazonAmazine it's exactly the point.
Everyone could have behaved better and the whole situation would have been avoided.

yeah…. No one pulls out if ever you aren’t looking just because you are a good driver. Right.

GoodChat · 30/05/2023 09:29

@AmazonAmazine no, but you can stop or slow down, not swerve on to the other side of the road or beep your horn or shout at them.

DRS1970 · 30/05/2023 09:29

If you are still so concerned I would report it to the police, even if you don't have the registration. It is road rage on the other drivers part, and careless driving, so worth getting it on record.

AmazonAmazine · 30/05/2023 09:33

GoodChat · 30/05/2023 09:29

@AmazonAmazine no, but you can stop or slow down, not swerve on to the other side of the road or beep your horn or shout at them.

If only we are good little women men won’t shout. I’m sure.
Totally ignoring how the OP mentions slowing down/ hitting her brakes you are now accusing her of not slowing down wrote swerving?
mmm

AmazonAmazine · 30/05/2023 09:33

DRS1970 · 30/05/2023 09:29

If you are still so concerned I would report it to the police, even if you don't have the registration. It is road rage on the other drivers part, and careless driving, so worth getting it on record.

I’d agree. The length of time following is a concern.
He’ll do it again.

piedbeauty · 30/05/2023 09:39

NowZeusHasLainWithLeda · 30/05/2023 06:03

He was pulling out and hadn't seen you (on the main road) You honked your horn at him and your partner shouted at him.

That he hadn't seen you when he was going to pull out but didn't is one thing, but your partner being abusive could perhaps explain the other driver's response to the event.

Really? Her partner shouting 'watch where you're going' is an EXCUSE for him to drive dangerously and tailgate? Ok then.

GoodChat · 30/05/2023 09:40

@AmazonAmazine it's not about being a 'good little woman' is it. It's about being a sensible driver and avoiding unnecessary conflict on the road.

If he was already in the middle of the road she'd have had to have swerved around him if that was the only solution to avoid hitting him. If she didn't swerve and drove round him cautiously she had plenty of time to stop. It's one or the other.

CalistoNoSolo · 30/05/2023 09:41

I see the hollier than thou brigade are out in force on this thread 🙄. Yes of course he was in the wrong to firstly pull out on you and subsequently drive like a dick to intimidate you. I can't see that you did anything wrong particularly, your partner could perhaps keep quiet next time, but tbh, when you get a shock and it's all happening in a few seconds it's easy to react without thinking. Don't sweat it OP, there are idiots and unpleasant people everywhere.

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