Aibu to commit to a new puppy

[Saddogmum]

4 days after the sudden death of my 3 year old?
my dd is against it but I miss him so much I could never replace him ever but my other dog is really lonely and I feel like I need to fill the big hole left in my life. I do f want to wait and lose time when memories can be made. I’m so heartbroken over the death of my big boy I couldn’t get out of bed for the past 3 days until someone suggested this and see how I feel.
I’m so confused I don’t want to ever forget him and iv chosen one that looks very similar I just want him back so much

I am so sorry for the loss of your dog, but I would advise you give a lot more time before deciding to buy a new one. The new puppy is not your old dog and choosing one that looks the same as him shows that you’re not ready for a new dog - you just want your old one back. Totally understandable, but not a healthy basis for a major decision like this.

Listen to your DD. Give yourself time to grieve this one. Replacing him won’t stop the pain - grief always catches up with you.

I think, as kindly as possible, you are being a bit unreasonable. You said you want to ‘fill the hole’ left and ‘just want him back.’ To me that does not sound like someone wants a new puppy. It sounds like you want your dog back, which is totally understandable but not fair because the new puppy won’t fill that hole. It won’t be getting the old dog back.

I would get some time and try to grieve your beloved dog before rushing into another one. Puppies are hard work enough without putting unrealistic expectations on them.

God, when I read the first sentence I thought that your human child had died
Sorry about the loss of your dog. I know how gutted I'd be if it were mine. However I think you need to allow yourself the time to grieve before making any hasty decisions. It does get easier (my cat was put down not so long ago)

There’s no time frame for this sort of thing but I would be wary of getting own that looks similar to replace your previous dog. No other dog will be the same as your previous boy. If you go into it thinking this, you are in for a disappointment and may struggle with the puppy.

You will be getting a new dog, a new character to create new memories with.

Hello,I'm so so sorry for the loss of your big boy.I hope you know he is now in safe hands and will be healed and happy.🌈

I would not get a puppy .
not yet.
both your dog and you need to grieve and give yourselves time.give your dog lots of attention and your time .I bought mine a big curved dog toy with a heartbeat inside that she curled up with a lot in the first few months after we lost our boy and it gave her some comfort.
your dog has enough going on without a puppy coming in and taking all of your time and attention,then he loses out all over again.Plus if he and new dog don't get on what are you going to do?not all dogs get to l ove each other.And of coyrse,with an age gap you will have the same issue down the line.
maybe in time consider a rescue dog the same age as your current dog,say in six months time.
You will meet your dog again in time but for now you must get up and go on living your life as best you can.
life and death is a cycle it is not the end.

I'm sorry for the loss of you dog.

There was a thread recently where the OP also lost a dog and they purchased a puppy and she ended up really disliking the puppy for the total normal puppy behaviour he had, but that wasn't present in the dog she had just lost.

I don't think you should purchase a new puppy yet while you're still massively grieving the loss of your other dog.

I’m so dreadfully sorry OP I lost my darling girl a month ago so know how wretched you feel, from what you say it doesn’t sound like you are ready yet, you are probably still in shock and have yet to grieve fully, give yourself some time and see how you feel in a few months time.

I know how you feel. I enquired about a puppy just days after losing our dog very suddenly at a young age too. We obviously had to wait a further 8 weeks to bring him home but have never for one minute regretted it. It was definitely the right thing to do for me. You have to do what's right for you. It's such a difficult decision to make for you and the family. Sending love 💐

Yes, you don't want to find your memories of your old dog obscured by the new dog who looks similar. It's not nice. It happened to me and we hadn't even rushed... it's just a lot of dogs of the breed do look pretty similar. I found it harder to recall my old boy as memories of the new one would come up. Don't be me OP!

When I lost my old lad it took a couple of years to be ready for a new dog. I literally said 'I want S back and that's not fair on a new dog' honestly I'd give it a little time

Really sorry for your loss. If you’re wanting a new dog because you are trying to replace the dog you’ve lost I don’t think the timing is right. Wait until you want a dog for the sake of a new dog as an individual.

Wait until you want a dog rather than your dog.

I know your all right it just doesn’t stop me wanting to just hold him again. But your right maybe I would be disappointeD or my grief may stop me being able to care for them
prooerly I will hold off

I didn’t think of this I thought it may help me remember him more as I’m so worried I’ll forget how much I loved him

You will never forget, it’s impossible to, the love I have for my late dog is forever with me

A friend did exactly this albeit a couple of weeks later and she has never bonded with the new dog. She goes through the motions but I think she actually dislikes him purely because he’s not her original dog. This wasn’t helped by the fact that puppies are inherently hard work and annoying at times.

We lost our beautiful boy a few months ago. It’s agony. It also does gradually get better. Hug other dogs and allow the grief.

Best wishes.